You’d think that someone like me would enjoy reading reddit, a site that bills itself as “the front page of the internet“. I’m always looking for topics to write about and I love reading and writing a good rant. However, aside from the occasional reference to reddit in news stories or forum posts, I don’t really frequent the site very often.
Somehow, I got hooked up to push notifications for reddit’s r/rant page, which is where people who need to vent their spleens go. More than once in the past week or so, I’ve gotten a notification for a juicy ranting on reddit. Unfortunately, the notifications always come when I’m in the middle of something else and I’m not fast enough to click the link before it disappears. This morning, I finally clicked and found myself staring at a page full of glorious profanity. I do enjoy a little profanity and, in fact, read a couple of my old posts from my Blogspot. I will candidly admit that even I was a little shocked by my own use of foul language. On the other hand, I’ve never been one to hide that I swear a lot.
My dad used to tell me that swearing was the mark of someone with a limited vocabulary and intelligence. I disagree with that notion. I happen to have a great vocabulary and, although some people may claim I say and do “dumb things”, actually, I don’t. I don’t know where the idea comes from some people that I’m “dumb”. Could it be my blondish grey hair? Could it be because I giggle a lot? Because I’m the youngest child in my family? Because I’m a female? Truly, I’m not a stupid person, and those who dismiss me as “stupid” are usually sorry later.
But anyway, the point is, I do cuss a lot. And yet, even though I cuss, and sometimes even indulge in the “sin” of name calling, I do cringe a little when I read some of my more impassioned rants, like this one. However, that particular post was also influenced by something offline which negatively influenced my mood. I guess, when I’m outraged and indignant, it colors my writing, regardless of what causes the upset.
In any case, even though I swear a lot, I have to admit to being a little turned off by the cursing on reddit/rant. Maybe it’s because a lot of the swearing came from insolent teenagers in the midst of a psychic meltdown. Having been through the storms of adolescence myself, I don’t wish to relive them by reading profane rants written in Internetese. Also, poor grammar and spelling are very irritating to me. It’s like listening to a choir singing flat, which is also like nails on a chalkboard to my sensitive ears. I don’t mind cussing if it’s done creatively and humorously, but when every other word is “fuck” or “goddamn”, it becomes boring in a hurry.
On the other hand, sometimes profane rants are hilarious… like this one. Evidently, this poor soul tried durian fruit for the first time and wasn’t impressed. One of the commenters described the distinctive (emphasis on stink) odor as “smelling like garlic, hot garbage and really stinky feet all at once. The smell is so overpowering (and I ate it still partially frozen so it wasn’t at peak odor) that there’s really no separate taste that I could distinguish. You’re just eating garlicky, hot garbage, foot-fruit.”
That’s quite a vivid description. I don’t think I’ve ever tried durian fruit myself. I do remember the Vietnamese bartender at Fort Belvoir once brought some in. She said it tastes like pudding or custard, but before you can enjoy that, you have to get past the stench. Most people probably won’t bother with it when they can have chocolate.
No… I think if you’re going to write a “fuck” filled rant, you should limit it to a funny topic like trying durian fruit for the first time. Don’t write a rant like that about anti-vaxxers, which is a serious issue that puts a lot of innocent people at risk. I mean, I get that it’s contentious and infuriating, but one or two fucks will be fine. Your rant loses its impact when every other word is “fuck”. And people do need to read and heed rants that call anti-vaxxers to task, especially since once almost eradicated diseases like measles and mumps are making a comeback and actually killing people. Ditto for this rant…
I mean, what’s s/he trying to say, anyway?
I need to spend a few minutes reading some of these reddit rants, though. They might remind me that, in the grand scheme of things, my problems are pretty small. At least I’m not Lori Loughlin, right? Looks like she could be headed to the big house before too long. You know things are pretty bad when Abby Lee Miller from Dance Moms is offering unsolicited prison survival tips. Of course, they were directed at Felicity Huffman, who is pleading guilty to her part in the “Varsity Blues” college admissions scandal and could also very well be off to jail before too long. But Huffman is not in as much trouble as Loughlin and her husband apparently are. Hell, maybe they’ll rant on reddit, too. Bonus points if they cuss a lot.