This morning, as I was scrolling through my feed, I noticed a new ad from the Facebook gods. Apparently, I am in the demographic for which bowel cancer screening is now encouraged. Check out this ad.

All kidding aside, it probably wouldn’t be a bad idea for me to take this test. I just think it’s kind of depressing that it shows up on my Facebook feed, along with ads for shape wear, ugly leggings, and period proof underwear. Lately, the ads have been getting more and more obnoxious and offensive, and I find myself clicking the “hide ad” button. They don’t give you enough choices to explain why you want to hide the ad, though. If I want to hide an ad, I have three choices as to why– it’s irrelevant, repetitive, or I’ve already purchased it. I don’t have the opportunity to claim that the ad is offensive, annoying, or stupid.

See what I mean? This just showed up in my feed. Good on them for showing women of different body types, but what in the world makes them think I’d want to wear leggings?

I’ve also been getting ads for things I’ve Googled, but not necessarily posted about on social media. For instance, a few weeks ago, I had an itchy rash. I was looking online for a good skin cream to soothe the itch. Before I knew it, Facebook was showing me ads for German skin products that treat itching. It was kind of creepy, since I never posted about the rash on Facebook. I mean, sometimes I do overshare, but even I have my standards.

For some reason, Facebook seems to think I’m in the market for beachfront property in Spain and Croatia. I get ads for homes for sale in those countries. To be honest, Bill has been talking about buying a house in Spain, mainly because we like Europe better than the United States. I don’t know that we’ll ever do that. It’s possible. He has friends who have done it, and we really don’t have any pressing reasons to move back to the United States, other than to reclaim the stuff we have in storage. In Spain, especially, there are lots of like minded Brits who abandoned England for sunny Spain. I like Spain, too, although it reminds me a little of Texas, especially in the summer.

The Croatian houses appear to be a good value, but I don’t speak a word of Croatian and have only been there on a joyride that lasted about two or three hours. I have yet to take a proper trip there. So why does Facebook think I want to buy a house in Croatia?

I’m kind of surprised I haven’t gotten more ads for cars. Bill and I recently test drove a couple of vehicles and decided on a Volvo. We usually buy our cars brand new, but we drive them until well after they’re paid off. I have a 2009 Mini Cooper that hasn’t even cracked 50,000 miles yet because I don’t drive it much. But it’s been paid off for five years. The Volvo is probably going to be our last expensive car. We’re getting older and there’s no need for all the bells and whistles. But I have mentioned the car shopping on Facebook and haven’t really been bombarded with car ads yet. Bill is placing the order for the car today, though, which probably means I’ll start getting hit with ads.

It seems to be the way of things that I get ads for things I’m no longer shopping for, like period proof panties. I mean, I can still use them, but I don’t see the point in that, since I’ve been dealing with occasionally bloody undies for over thirty years now. Why switch when pretty soon, I’ll be in the blissful land of menopause?

I also get ads for dentists and dental insurance. It’s true that once I hit forty, I started having more dental needs. In fact, I have a date to see our dentist this week. Hopefully, there won’t be anything wrong, because that’s all I’d need.

I think the worst ads are the ones that seem to read my mind. It’s almost like advertisers know what’s in your head. Sometimes that’s not such a bad thing, since it can lead to finding something you want or need. For me, it’s unnerving, though, that social media seems to know what I want when I haven’t even expressed it. Right now, there’s an ad for a Swiss mattress on my Facebook feed. I haven’t posted about needing a new mattress or even shopped for one, since I have an American bed and European mattresses are different. But we do need a new mattress. The one we have is about ten years old and it’s due to be replaced. That will have to wait. 2019 is already turning out to be very expensive!

I suspect there will be more annoying noise pollution today as the road workers continue to reconstruct our sidewalk. Last year, in our last town, they were fixing the road in front of the house. This year, in a new house, it’s the sidewalk. I’m glad we’ll be leaving town in a couple of days, because the noise really stresses me out.

Oh… and I’m so glad Meghan “popped” yesterday. Funny, she was probably in the process as I was writing that post. I guess we were on the same wavelength.