Edited to add: On December 29, 2021, I noticed that Justin and Julia have very recently taken down their original videos. They can now be accessed on this channel. They explain that they have remastered the recordings and “bleeped” out the expletives that are in the original recordings, so that people who really need to hear the message can do so comfortably. Personally, I am all about cussing, but I get why they felt the need to censor the “dirty words”. Below is a screen shot of their explanation.

And now, the original post from last spring, minus the video links…

I know I already wrote today, but I want to take a quick moment to share this podcast I discovered, courtesy of all the Duggar followers out there. The podcast is called “I Pray You Put This Journal Away”, and it appears on the YouTube channel of the same name.

The podcast is done by a husband and wife named Justin and Julia. Justin grew up in the Deep South and was a fundamentalist Christian. He knew the Duggar family, and was once friends with Josh Duggar. Back in 2015, when Josh’s world was imploding, Justin tried to speak to the press about what he knew about him. Unfortunately, no one wanted to listen to him then, but people are definitely listening now. Julia was also raised fundie, but she’s from out West. They seem like a really good couple… and they have DEFINITELY left fundie Christianity. Justin was dropping lots of f bombs, which I appreciated greatly. I can hardly blame him, either.

What makes their podcast so interesting, besides the obvious regard Justin and Julia have for each other, and the truth bombs they share about sex pest Josh Duggar, is that Justin grew up undiagnosed with autism. Since Bill’s older daughter supposedly has autism (as does Ex’s youngest child), it was very illuminating for me to hear what he has to say. I mean, it’s not like he talks a lot about what it’s like to be autistic, but he does talk a little bit about how it’s hard for him to catch on to social cues.

I listened to all three (LONG) episodes today, mainly because I have nothing else to do. I must say, I was moved by Justin’s comments. My heart kind of went out to him, as he read his journal entries from around 2005-06, particularly as he spoke about his struggle and great pressure to be the perfect Christian. He was trying to impress the likes of Jim Bob Duggar, who certainly wasn’t worthy of his admiration or ambition. But I can tell by what he wrote, and remembering what it was like when I was a teenager, that he really was trying so hard… to the point of fasting obsessively, praying constantly, and quoting the Bible. Obviously, a lot has changed since those days. I like his theme music. It’s kind of lovely and sensitive… I relate to it.

I have a feeling this podcast is really going to take off, even if they eventually run out of journal entries to read. I had a journal when I was young, but no one would want to hear what I had to say back then. I don’t think many want to hear what I have to say now, either! I admire how candid Justin is, and how loving and friendly Julia is… I can tell they have a warm and friendly relationship, which is really nice. It’s clear to me that above all, these two are friends and are well matched. They care about each other, which is probably more than a lot of couples, especially those raised in fundie Christianity, can say.

Sometimes this podcast is sad. Sometimes it’s touching. Sometimes it’s funny… I really do recommend it, especially to anyone who is at all interested in the Duggar drama going on right now. I think I would have enjoyed it even if not for the Duggars, and all the dishing Justin does about knowing Josh back in the day (and finding out firsthand what a fucking creep he is). I think I would enjoy knowing Justin and Julia, too.

And now, back to my super boring Friday night alone, drinking sparkling mineral water… Hope your Friday night is more exciting and less lonely than mine is.