condescending twatbags, language, modern problems

“Using that word to describe the woman in this article says a lot about you… and none of it is good.”

Last night, I read a post on God’s Facebook page that is very timely, as kids all across America head back to school. The article was derived from a lively Reddit thread, where poster BlueCarrot002 asked if she was the “asshole” for getting personalized stationery for her daughter.

I must admit, as a childless child of the 70s and 80s, this trend of parents being asked to buy extra supplies for classrooms is a strange idea to me. In my day, everybody brought their own supplies to school. And parents would put their child’s name on their stuff, so it wouldn’t get “borrowed” or redistributed. I’m sure it sucked back then for kids whose parents didn’t have a lot of money. But, if you think about it, we all knew whose parents had money, and whose didn’t. Hell, I used to be jealous of my classmates whose parents bought them Trapper Keepers for every subject, while I had cheap plastic binders with shitty plastic rings. Or they had those cool erasable pens, while I had some cheesy ballpoint pen my dad got from some business. My mom wasn’t one to pander to my desires for fancy school supplies, and we would usually shop for that stuff at AAFES. And AAFES, at least in the 80s, was not a high end store.

This was THE status symbol, when I was in the 4th grade.

Unfortunately, life isn’t fair. Some kids are more athletic than others are. Some are more attractive or musically talented or funny. Some kids are academic geniuses. And some have parents who have money, and can buy them pencils with dinosaurs on them, personalized stationery, or lefty scissors. Or they have parents who are willing to deal with the child’s sensory issues by getting them notebooks with plastic spirals instead of metal ones. Some people prefer to write with certain types of pens and pencils. If that helps them succeed in doing their work, what’s the big deal? Part of growing up is learning to accept that life isn’t fair, and doing the best you can with what you have.

I don’t remember this ad, but we liked our Paper Mates, too.

I can understand the reasons teachers might have for asking parents to contribute supplies. I also understand why they would want the parents to get things that are generic. However, based on God’s article, it doesn’t sound like the teacher specified that the supplies should be the cheapest available. She was likely fine with genuine Crayola crayons over the generic ones that are found at the Dollar Tree. It sounds like the mom in this instance simply wanted to provide the best available supplies for her child. I don’t blame her for that.

What really got my hackles up, though, was the fact that the teacher sent home what the Redditor describes as a “very passive aggressive note” inviting her to come in for a “talking to” with the teacher. Now, it could be that the teacher’s note wasn’t actually passive aggressive. Maybe it was a friendly note. But since the actual note isn’t provided to Redditors, I will just assume the mom’s assessment of the note’s tone is correct.

I don’t blame the mom for refusing the teacher’s request. I would do the same thing.

Generally speaking, I am very pro-teacher. I think they are underpaid and disrespected. I know they have a tough job, and they literally put their lives on the line working in education these days. I still think it would grind my gears to have a teacher dictate to me that I must buy extra supplies for the classroom, to cover the kids who don’t have what they need, and then tell me that I can’t provide the school supplies that work best for my own child. And I would not take kindly to a “request” to come in for a discussion about my kid’s perfectly good school supplies, especially after I contributed the “generic” extra supplies that were requested. In fact, I would probably end up complaining to a higher power. My response to the teacher’s “request” (which sounds more like a demand) would likely be a resounding “NO.” However… It does seem strange to me that the mom would buy “personalized stationery”. In my day, we all just used college ruled loose leaf paper.

No more chalkboards!

Most of the people on God’s page were all about the mom providing personalized supplies for her child. I see on Reddit, the commenters are offering good reasons why the policy of redistributing supplies is potentially traumatic, as well as unfair. One person wrote about how they were going through tough financial straits and sent their child with used supplies from their older siblings. The teacher sent the used supplies back, explaining that they weren’t appropriate. Why not? The used supplies work as well as brand new ones do. And then the poor kid was humiliated in front of their peers.

Others wrote about how they were asked to buy tons of supplies every year that never got used, or were items that should last for years, like scissors, protractors, rulers and compasses. Specifically, one poster wrote “those things will last for years, if you take care of them.” Exactly… and part of the experience of being in school should be teaching children to take care of their things, and maintain possession of their own stuff. So yeah, if I were the mom in this scenario, I would be raising some hell.

A pretty good representation of what it was like for us in the 80s.

I read some of the Facebook comments… and then I had to stop. I must be turning into an old lady now, because one comment literally made me cringe. A man from Minnesota (I checked to make sure he wasn’t a Brit or living in Britain), wrote something along the lines of, “That woman is just a cunt. She just wants to show off how much money she has. Fuck her!”

Wow. I’m not sure what prompted this guy– name of Ryan– to leave such a misogynistic and completely inappropriate response to that article. However, against my better judgment, I felt compelled to respond to him with what I think is a gentle rebuke.

I wrote, “Ryan, using that word to describe the woman in this article says a lot about you… and none of it is good.”

I fully expected Ryan to come back and call ME a cunt. Usually, that type of person has no qualms about spewing their nastiness on anyone in the strike zone. I did pause before I commented, because I don’t want to be called a cunt. Especially after I’ve had a beer or two, as was the case last night. But then I realized that I can always block Ryan if he lobs verbal abuse at me. Lately, I’ve been blocking people I haven’t even engaged with, simply because I can easily tell that they aren’t people with whom I wish to interact.

After I commented to Ryan, I had to sit and contemplate for a few minutes. I must be getting old. I have often stated, and I do actually believe, that all words are useful sometimes. I do think there are even some times when the word “cunt” is appropriate. However, in the United States, that’s generally a term that is saved for the end of an argument. Sure, if you’re a Brit, you might use it to describe a silly fool, or something. But that article was written for and mostly read by Americans, and to Americans, the word “cunt” is among the worst of the worst insults, especially to women. We would all be up in arms if someone casually dropped the n bomb on social media. So why is it okay for Ryan to call some mother he doesn’t know a “cunt”, simply because he has unresolved issues regarding women? I mean, I know I’m assuming, but why else would he go there so early?

Anyway… I was surprised at myself, because after I read Ryan’s comment, it turned me off of the comment page. I had to click off of it. I shared God’s post on my own page, and a few friends who are teachers chimed in. Most seemed to think the teacher’s policy of redistributing school supplies is ridiculous. I mean, I guess some teachers pass out and collect the supplies at the beginning and end of each session. I still think there’s value in teaching children that they have to keep up with their own stuff, and that labeling things, especially when you’re working in a group, is a smart policy.

Count me among those who also think that if a stranger’s behavior seems wrong or unfair, it’s better not to call them a name that connotes so much hatred for a group of people. The fact that Ryan felt perfectly fine in referring to a concerned mother as a “cunt” who is “showing off” her money, tells me that he has some serious issues with women, and probably people with money, too. It’s not a good look, as the orange turd would say.

Reading this story makes me glad I don’t have children.

Bonus video… this one is pretty funny!

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narcissists, politicians, royals, Uncategorized, YouTube

Speaking the “Queen’s English”, doesn’t make you a Brit, Ex…

Recently, I read and reviewed UK journalist Tom Bower’s book, Revenge, which is all about Meghan Markle. As I read the book, I also followed H.G. Tudor’s YouTube channel, in which Mr. Tudor read the book to his followers and explained what was happening within the lens of a narcissist. H.G. Tudor claims to be a sociopathic narcissist, and he says that gives him special insight to obvious narcissists. Tudor believes that Markle is a narcissist. Frankly, I agree with him, but I obviously don’t know for absolute certain. It’s just a hunch.

Let’s just say I clearly see the signs of narcissism and facade building, and I am fairly convinced that most of what Meghan Markle does publicly is an act. It would stand to reason that she’s playing a role, since she was most recently pursuing an acting career. She is literally an actress, albeit not a very convincing one, in my opinion. I’ve been around a lot of narcissists in my lifetime, as most of us have. Hell, Donald Trump has subjected the entire world to narcissistic abuse, so it’s safe to say that the vast majority of the world’s population have been exposed to the toxicity that comes from narcissism and narcissistic people. In my view, spotting a narcissist or narcissistic behavior is kind of like spotting pornography. You can’t always define it, but you know it when you see it.

H.G. Tudor explains why he thinks Meghan is a narcissist.

H.G. Tudor is not the only person who thinks Meghan Markle is a narcissist. So does The Body Language Guy, Jesus Enrique Rosas, who has done a bunch of YouTube videos analyzing Meghan Markle’s body language and nonverbal behaviors. If you look around YouTube, you will find many people making videos about Markle and her apparently self-serving behaviors, to include a thinly veiled ambition to someday be the President of the United States or some other high ranking political leader. God help us… I hope the country figures out that obvious narcissists don’t make good leaders. Because besides being abusive and lacking in empathy for others, narcissists are FAKE… and they are constantly putting up a facade that is meant to fool people into thinking they are better people than they are.

Jesus Enrique Rosas talks about the speculation about Meghan’s political aspirations.
Lady Colin Campbell says that she thinks Meghan is a narcissist, too. I’m not the only one, obviously.

So why am I writing about this today? I had actually meant to write about an entirely different topic. I changed my mind when I checked out Ex’s latest tweets, most of which give me a good laugh. Lately, she’s been tweeting incessantly about a certain TV show about Scotland, excitedly claiming she is, herself, a member of a famous Highland family. She has also, more than once, expressed a desire to learn “Scots Gaelic”, as she claims that it’s her “native tongue” (even though she was born to US citizens in Texas). Like Meghan Markle, Ex is very narcissistic, and she isn’t satisfied with who she is. So she goes to great lengths to try to convince people that she is someone she’s not. The harder she tries, the more unconvincing she is.

As far as I know, this obsession with Scotland is a somewhat recent development for Ex. According to Bill, when they were still married, Ex didn’t speak incessantly about being a “Scot”. She was then a fan of romantic historical fiction and fantasy, as she apparently is now, but she wasn’t claiming to be from a renowned Scottish family. Given that she was adopted, it would have been a strange claim to be making. But Ex has since apparently met her birth parents, and has openly disparaged them. So why she would want to claim any ancestral ties to them– people who had an extramarital affair, conceived Ex, and then gave her up for adoption, where she landed with abusive and neglectful parents– I don’t know. Obviously, they weren’t great people, even if there’s any truth to her claim that one or both of them came from a famous Scottish clan from the Highlands. What they did is, in fact, very ordinary behavior that had rather tragic consequences on many levels.

Like Ex, I have heavily Scottish roots, and I am proud of them. I have been to Scotland several times, and I used to live in England, which is where my second highest DNA concentration of ancestry comes from. I’ve also visited Ireland, which is where the third highest concentration comes from in my DNA heritage, though by much less than Scotland and England. I do feel a kinship to the UK, not just because I have the DNA from there, but because I have also spent a lot of time there, have friends from there, and it’s just become a really familiar place for me, just as Germany has.

BUT– I am still an AMERICAN. I don’t claim to be British, in spite of having a huge amount of British DNA. Most of my family came to the United States in the 1600s and eventually made their way to the western side of Virginia. That’s more like my home, even though I have never officially lived in Rockbridge County or its environs. I was born and mostly raised in the Tidewater area of Virginia, and even though I have no family living there, aside from my mother, that is also my home. Not Britain… in spite of my very British heritage, and in spite of the fact that I feel at ease there and obviously look like the natives, especially when I’m in Scotland.

I have lived in Germany now for ten years of my life, but I don’t have a lot of German heritage. I know I have some, because I’ve found obvious Germans in my family tree, and I doubt the Germans I found were actually Brits who were adopted by German families. The DNA tests don’t seem to recognize my German ancestors, even though they recognize the Native American woman who got pregnant by one of my ancestors in the 1600s. I guess this just proves that the DNA tests aren’t necessarily the clearest picture of where a person’s origins are. I’ve been in Germany for a long time, but I’m not German. I’m still American. Living here, learning the language, and appropriating the culture would not make me German, no matter how long my stay is. If I became a German citizen, I guess that would make me more of a German, at least by means of a passport. But really, at least culturally speaking, I’d still be an American.

On some level, I suspect Ex is engaging in some fantasy, building a story that makes her feel better about herself. What I find interesting, and potentially problematic, is that she is presenting her bullshit to the masses on Twitter. There are people who actually know her, and know the realities of who she is. People who know her real story probably laugh at her claims of being descended from a famous Scottish family, as if that somehow makes her special. Nevertheless, Ex still tries to put out this false image– the same thing Meghan Markle does– as if she hopes to convince strangers to accept her for what she’s not.

If you do some digging into Meghan Markle’s life, you quickly realize that her false “Diana-esque” humanitarian facade is not real. She knows how to act like a nice person when people are watching, but based on multiple accounts by credible people, it’s not genuine. Furthermore, Meghan has lied about a lot of things, like, for instance, her assertion that she didn’t know much about Prince Harry before they dated. That is obviously a whopper of a lie, and it has been debunked by people who actually know her. And yet, in spite of people who know her reporting the truth of what they know to others, Meghan has still tried to convince us of the veracity of her obvious lie.

Same thing with Donald Trump. There are many examples of his egregiously bad behavior… but people will still swear up and down that he was sent here by Jesus Christ to save America, and that the media is “persecuting” him. I won’t say that the media can’t be brutal, and certainly there has been “fake news” put out there. But… where there’s smoke, there’s almost always fire. Lots of credible people have spoken and written about what a vile person Trump is, and the proof is becoming more evident every day, especially right now. So, even though Trump knows how to charm people, that charm is superficial. It’s not real. And people who are clued into narcissism obviously clue in to it quickly and don’t accept Trump’s alternative version of “truth”.

Narcissists love to revise history. Listen to H.G. Tudor, and you will hear him talk about how Meghan Markle has done it many times. Meghan has, just like Trump, also used DARVO. Remember when she claimed that Kate made her cry during a dress fitting? I don’t believe Meghan’s story. I have not seen Kate Middleton make a false step yet. Although she’s clearly human, and like all people, she makes mistakes, I have not heard of Kate Middleton bullying anyone. When she smiles, it’s believable. She’s the epitome of charm and grace. If anyone were going to do the impossible and step into Diana’s shoes, it would be her, not Meghan Markle.

I remember hearing that when Princess Diana died, Ex was reportedly devastated. Bill has told me that she idolized Diana, as many people have. People like to emulate those they admire– and take on some of their traits. Obviously Meghan wants to be like Diana, or at least get people to see her as “Diana-esque”. She’s a poor substitute, because she doesn’t have what Diana had… and Diana, by the way, was no perfect saint herself! But, she was clearly much more genuine in terms of her feelings than most Royals are. Ex would probably very much like to be like Diana, just as Meghan obviously wants to be, but that’s impossible. All she can be is herself, which is all any of us can be.

Now… just for those who have managed to wade through the bulk of this post, I’m going to show everyone what has inspired today’s rantings. Before I do that, let me explain that there was a time when Ex was decidedly NOT liberal in her political leanings. But like many, in the age of Trump, she has apparently chosen a different path. I don’t fault her for that at all. In fact, I am delighted that she’s voting blue, because today’s Republican Party is a total shitshow, and every vote is a push for getting rid of this very destructive political trend. However, some of Ex’s “woke” platitudes are very hypocritical, especially given that I know firsthand about the horrific and obvious physical, mental, verbal, and emotional abuse she has delivered to her supposed loved ones and former spouses.

Someone on Twitter posted this:

This is a funny song that Trump adversaries sang at some rally. It uses the word “cunt”, which Americans recognize as an extremely misogynistic, offensive, nasty word that is often hurled at women. Sadly, most people who use the word “cunt” don’t even save it for the end of an argument anymore. Ex… showing everyone that she is, in fact, an American, and not a Brit, posted this response.

Ex… you are quite clearly NOT a Brit. You are an American, and you think like an American. Time to embrace that, and stop trying to be someone you’re not.

As to Ex’s contention that no one has the right to use the word “cunt”, I would say that she’s wrong. That word, like all words, has a use, and sometimes the use is appropriate. There are times when it’s not even offensive to use the word “cunt”. It’s all about context, right? Like, people in Ex’s precious Scotland don’t get upset when Brits say the word “cunt”. Why? Because it doesn’t have the same meaning there that it does in the United States. Same thing with the word “fag”. In the US, “fag” and “faggot” are very offensive slurs that refer to male homosexuals. But in Britain they are, respectively, a cigarette and a type of sausage, or even a bundle of sticks.

If Ex really wants to be “woke”, she might want to consider that the US perspective is not the perspective for everyone else in the world. Like, for instance,– I have seen the Confederate battle flag flown in countries all over Europe. People don’t care much here, because that flag doesn’t have the same meaning to Europeans as it does to Americans, and many people here don’t feel like they should have to avoid offending Americans. Likewise, a Nazi era swastika is offensive to many people, including Americans. Hanging one up here, outside the house, would likely merit a visit from the police. But Nazi symbolism will likely be much more offensive to certain groups– specifically Jewish people and Germans, who have been taught that it’s very taboo– than it is to, say, your garden variety American redneck who is also proud to display a Confederate battle flag.

Those symbols, which obviously mean something to some people, don’t mean the same thing to every person, because not every person has the same perspectives. And people can’t and shouldn’t automatically be expected to follow the perspectives of everyone else. We shouldn’t, for instance, get angry at someone who lives in the bush country of Africa for admiring the Confederate battle flag after seeing it for the first time. They wouldn’t automatically assume the flag is “bad”, because they lack context or a concept of what that flag represents– just like any young child does when seeing or hearing something for the first time. In fact, I would argue that the flag isn’t actually “bad”, in and of itself; it’s actually a neutral thing. It’s the racist and hateful attitudes from the people behind what the flag symbolizes that makes it “bad”. But it’s much easier to ban a flag than it is to confront the people behind what it symbolizes.

I could go on and on about this, as it’s a pet topic of mine. I get annoyed by people who want to aggressively cram their agendas down other people’s throats, as they claim to value freedom of expression and opinion. The left is just as bad as the right when it comes to this, especially when it’s clear that the person who claims his or her opinion is “correct”, hasn’t actually thought much about the issue at all, and is really just parroting what other people have said.

Father Nathan Monk has had a couple of recent contentious Facebook threads about so-called “spelling and grammar police” that has clearly demonstrated that as open minded and tolerant as some left wing folks want to seem to be, they really share some characteristics with some of the most militant right wingers. The behavior is the same, even if the ideology isn’t. But… this is already a long and convoluted post, and I’m thinking about doing a music video. So I’m going to close this post and get on with the day.

Personally, I think Father Nathan Monk, as well as a lot of his followers, are doing what they accuse other people of doing. Any time someone responds to a disagreement with rudeness, anger, and derision, rather than patience, forbearance, and tolerance, they are guilty of the same toxic behavior as what they’re criticizing. And before anyone calls me out, I will admit that I am guilty of this myself, sometimes. Telling that guy I posted about yesterday to “fuck off” wasn’t constructive. But then, I doubt he wanted to hear me out, anyway.

Well… if you’ve managed to get through this and actually read it to the end, I thank you. I continue to write about this topic because it’s fascinating to me, but it also helps me maintain perspective. Anyone who has had direct ties to a narcissist knows that things will get confusing quickly, if you let them call all of the shots. So I write this stuff down to keep my head straight. If anyone else finds it helpful, informative, or interesting, so much the better.

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stupid people

I don’t care if strange men call me the c-word…

Today’s post is a very frank discussion of a certain hateful word toward women. Please don’t read this if you can’t handle it. It’s going to be quite raw and probably offensive.

Yesterday’s post is bleeding into today’s post… Heh heh heh… I wrote “bleeding”. Just got off the rag myself, because a certain part of my body has been bleeding this week. Monthly periods are a by product of being able to make babies. I won’t lie. They’re gross. But without that body function, none of us would be alive.

Apparently, some men feel that the vulgar word referring to that part of a woman’s body is the best insult to hurl at a woman… any woman at all. I got called a “cunt” on Facebook yesterday. I probably should have thought to take screen shots of the exchange, but I decided not to. I was on my iPad and it wasn’t convenient.

I was reading ol’ Ron’s inane conspiracy post about how the Democrats and the Chinese are colluding to destroy our American economy by spreading a dangerous viral pandemic and killing thousands of people. I read some of the comments on that post. A guy named “Bill”– not MY Bill, but another Bill that, in this post, I’ll call “‘ol Bill”– posted a meme featuring a picture of Donald Trump with both of his middle fingers in their upright and locked positions. The meme in question kind of looked like today’s featured photo, except both of Trump’s middle fingers were raised. It was obviously intended to be rude and insulting to anyone who isn’t a Trump fan. The meme included the caption, “Still your president.” And, with the raised fingers added the non-written sentiment, “so fuck you…”

I don’t usually respond to stuff like that, but for some reason, yesterday I was feeling kind of saucy. Maybe it’s all this social isolation and boredom that did me in, and my utter exhaustion at being confronted by boorish Trump lovers. So I posted the below picture… Actually, I posted a GIF, but this came up on my memories today and was convenient for this post…

Ol’ Bill didn’t like this much… and he responded to me with another meme styled personal insult.

I noticed that ol’ Bill had a photo of himself and, apparently, his son as his profile picture, with a caption indicating that he’s in favor of “men’s rights“. My guess is that he and the mother of his son are embroiled in a custody dispute, since ol’ Bill’s Facebook page was full of pictures of a young male child, Trump quotes, and comments about how it’s not fair that women get custody of children more often than men do.

For the record, I’m not totally against men’s rights, particularly when it comes to child custody issues. I strongly believe that, post birth, fathers must have parental rights, too, unless there is a damned good reason for them not to have them. I also think that some mothers should not have unbridled access to their children. My own husband, Bill, was denied contact with his daughters for almost their entire childhoods. Bill’s abusive ex wife is a terrible mother and, as we’ve recently learned, regularly uses her children to hurt other people. Bill’s ex puts her kids through hell. I still kick myself for not reporting Bill’s ex wife to child protective services, although back when it would have mattered, we didn’t have nearly as much information as we have today. I did struggle with the decision back then, but opted not to call, since we were in Virginia and they were in Arizona. I now know that my gut instinct was right on, and we should have reported her, fallout be damned.

In any case, if conservative, Trump loving, ‘ol Bill had gotten to know me, he might find that I do have some empathy for his plight. I’m not impressed by his political leanings, but the fact that he’s a Trumper doesn’t necessarily mean that he isn’t a good father. But I never got to tell him that, because unfortunately, ‘ol Bill then went right below the belt with a misogynistic insult. And I couldn’t help but think that maybe the mother of his son is right to keep the boy away from his father, who obviously hates women– or at least has a problem with them having any say.

I knew I’d struck a nerve by posting back to ‘ol Bill, even with a non profane picture of Trump with a frog on his face. I had a feeling that trolling him would be like shooting fish in a barrel. Just for fun, I called ‘ol Bill an off brand buttplug– a toy that can be enjoyed by anyone. I have to confess that it wasn’t an original insult. I read it in a hilarious open letter to Donald Trump and thought it was funny. I guess that hurt ‘ol Bill’s feelings, though, because next, he went right for my reproductive parts by coming back with this…

Wow… them’s fightin’ words, ain’t they? Luckily, when it comes to the c-word from strangers, I wear a steel plated panty shield.

Once again, I chose not to respond to ‘ol Bill with a meme. Instead, I wrote “Trump supporters aren’t known for being deep thinkers. I don’t care that you think I’m a cunt. I think you’re a load that should have been swallowed.” And that was the end of our discussion. I didn’t get any other notifications from ‘ol Bill. Hours later, I discovered that ‘ol Bill had blocked me, which suits me fine. As George Carlin would say, “you don’t want to have anything to do with an asshole like that.” I was glad he quit engaging, because it’s a strain to be vulgar to strangers and, if I’m honest, after the first couple of barbs, it ceases to be fun.

Before ‘ol Bill blocked me, I took an even longer look at his Facebook page. I could see that he has a young son that he apparently doesn’t get to see as often as he would like. I can only assume that the reason ‘ol Bill doesn’t see his son very often is because, for whatever reason, the boy’s mother doesn’t cooperate with him. And maybe that makes ‘ol Bill feel hateful toward her, and by proxy, all other women who take him on, especially on social media. Maybe that’s also why he admires Donald Trump. Trump openly disdains women, and doesn’t mind trying to put them in their places by making disgusting, gender specific comments about them and treating them like sex objects. For all I know, ‘ol Bill is actually a sweet person with a good heart. But I think he was hateful to me because I am a stranger who happens to own a body part that has ultimately caused him significant pain. And, just like the child he doesn’t see enough of, he’s lashing out in a childish way by going nuclear with the c-word.

I don’t usually engage with people like ‘ol Bill. I find that it’s a waste of time and energy, even if it’s sometimes fun to watch them squirm. I probably responded to him yesterday because I was so shocked by the sheer stupidity of that post by “‘ol Ron” and thousands of people posting who were patting him on the back for his non-sensical drivel about how evil liberals are. I’m tired of the daily Trump shitshow, the lack of civility and interest in working together for the common good, and the idiocy that is inspired by Trump’s non-stop lunacy. I’m offended by people who openly taunt those of us who are sincerely worried and upset about Trump’s disastrous leadership, particularly when they do it in a profane way. Every once in awhile, God help me, I simply can’t resist.

But today’s post isn’t so much about Trump and Trump’s seemingly hellbent intention of destroying the country. Today I want to address men who think the word “cunt” is the best weapon to use in an argument with a woman. Guys, the fact is, it’s not. In fact, whether or not the word “cunt” is offensive depends on where you’re from. In the United Kingdom and Australia and other British influenced cultures, the word “cunt” is not even all that gender specific. Calling someone a cunt in England is akin to saying they’re stupid. It’s just like the word “fag”, which is so offensive in the United States, is not at all offensive in England, where it’s a slang term for cigarettes. As George Carlin would say, the words are totally neutral and innocent. Words are just tools. It’s the intention behind them that make them “good” or “bad”.

Please tell me. Why should I care if someone like ‘ol Bill calls me a cunt? Am I supposed to be hurt that some strange guy I’ve never even met supposedly thinks I’m a cunt? I don’t even know ‘ol Bill, and he doesn’t know me, so his comment isn’t personal. He’s certainly not the first person to call me a cunt. I’ve survived every other time someone’s called me that. He was simply lashing out, and my retort that he’s a load that should have been swallowed apparently cut him deeply enough to block me. It shouldn’t have, though. I was simply giving him what he put out… and I don’t know him, so whether or not his mother should have spat or swallowed instead of conceiving him is immaterial to me.

For all I know, ‘ol Bill is not an off brand buttplug. He might be a swell guy, like my Bill is. I do think, however, that he asks for insults by taunting people with stupid memes featuring Donald Trump with his middle fingers raised. I mean, if you respect Trump, why would you use his picture to insult perfect strangers? The middle finger is, in and of itself, intended to be rude. When you use a world leader to put out that message, it becomes more personal and offensive. That meme wouldn’t have drawn the same reaction if ‘ol Bill had used a stick figure with middle fingers raised instead of Trump’s picture. But he started our unfortunate encounter by using Trump to insult all comers. Is he surprised someone called him out for doing that? Would he have had the same reaction if I’d been a man?

The word “cunt” to an American woman is supposed to be a deeply personal, hurtful insult. If someone I loved and respected– say my dear husband, Bill– called me a cunt, I would probably be very hurt and angry. But honestly, when some guy I don’t know or respect calls me a cunt, supposedly to put me in my place, all I really feel like doing is laughing at the stupidity of it. Especially when I can see on the guy’s Facebook page that a fellow cunt owner has obviously deeply injured him and has apparently made him hate every other cunt owner out there. And yet… I highly doubt that ‘ol Bill is gay, so deep down, he probably enjoys interactions with cunts. His pecker probably craves the occasional meeting with that particular part of a woman’s anatomy. Indeed, it was a cunt that provided Bill with everything– from his own life, to the life of the boy whose photos are plastered all over his Facebook page.

Yes… besides ‘ol Bill’s mother, who probably had conventional sex with ‘ol Bill’s father and passed the baby version of ‘ol Bill through her cunt, another “cunt” has also given something very precious to ‘ol Bill. Now, it appears that the owner of the cunt ‘ol Bill’s son sprang from has taken away that gift by denying him equal access to the boy. So now, ‘ol Bill responds by championing misogynists like Donald Trump and attacking women he doesn’t even know with a very insulting word that is usually meant for the end of a heated argument.

Like I said, the word “cunt”, in the American style, is supposedly designed to be cruel, hateful, and demeaning. But it really only has power if the person on the receiving end cares about the opinion of the person who said it. And beyond thinking about ‘ol Bill’s “insult” for the purpose of writing this post, I genuinely don’t care that he called me that word, even if he really does think I’m a cunt. People I have known, loved, and respected have said much worse things to me than ‘ol Bill did. It’s probably because of those people that I engaged with ‘ol Bill in the first place, because I have my own anger issues.

So… to all of you guys out there who feel that calling a woman a “cunt” is the worst thing you can do– particularly if you also add the word “fat” in front of it, I have news for you. It’s very likely that the woman you’re calling a cunt doesn’t give a shit about your opinion. In fact, most of us know that most of you crave access to our cunts and that’s your very specific and pathetic weakness. When you resort to using that word to demean women, you’re really just showing us how weak and sad you are because some woman in your life hurt you and denied you access to her body… and you are reminding us that when it comes down to it, without cunts, you wouldn’t even be here. I suggest you come up with something else.

Yeah… but even this isn’t that offensive, is it?

And… if you are an obvious Trump supporter calling me a cunt, just know that I think it’s hilarious, and you might even inspire me to write about you. Because, just like ‘ol Bill and Donald Trump, you’re stupid and ultimately powerless. A stronger leader than Trump wouldn’t have daily meltdowns on TV and Twitter, and blame other people for his own obvious failures and egregious mistakes. It’s true that Trump is in charge right now, but one day, he definitely won’t be. And you’ll be on the wrong side of history, just like Hitler’s supporters are.

Now… I’m off to give my cunt some much needed attention.

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