communication, healthcare, law, mental health, psychology, social media

“Ammosexuals” who steadfastly refuse to accept reality, as more people die…

Happy last day of March, y’all. It’s been quite an eventful month for Bill and me. We lost our beloved Arran, finally took a road trip, and watched the weather gradually turn from wintery to springlike. I always enjoy spring, even though April is historically kind of a “cruel” month. Especially when it comes to gun violence.

I remember back on April 20, 1999, when we first heard the names Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold, of Columbine, Colorado. News of the Columbine High School shootings was on every major television network. People were incredibly shocked by the violence of it. Until February 2018, the Columbine High School Massacre was the deadliest mass shooting in U.S. history. It is still the deadliest mass shooting in Colorado history.

What initially prompted Harris and Klebold to do what they did? I read that they had originally planned to bomb their school. Were they influenced by Timothy McVeigh and Terry Nichols, two men who were behind the Oklahoma City Bombing in April 1995? Reading up on Columbine, I don’t think Harris and Klebold were motivated by the same causes McVeigh and Nichols were, but maybe they admired the sheer number of people who died. And now, their community’s name is a code word for the mass shootings that have plagued the country over the past 24 years.

As I sit here typing this, I remember April 1995, when the Alfred P. Murrah building was blown up. That incident was inspired by another incident– Ruby Ridge in 1992 and the 1993 Waco siege carried out by US federal officials. The one thing these incidents have in common is a violent precursor. The old saying goes– “violence begets violence.” When someone is hurt or killed in a violent way, it inspires a violent reaction in other people. And, just like the cursed COVID virus, it spreads apace.

I have a Facebook friend who is an Air Force veteran and an ex Mormon. He lives in Texas, and espouses surprisingly liberal views. I haven’t seen him posting much lately, but when he does post, he often refers to “ammosexuals”. I like that term, because it really does seem like a lot of people are practically in love with their guns. Like… they almost get a sexual charge from owning and carrying a weapon.

While a lot of those folks claim to care about gun safety, and often bring up their Second Amendment rights, they have what I think are inappropriate reactions to mass shootings. It’s almost as if they forget that real human beings were hurt or killed by the shooter’s bullets. They have no empathy for what that must feel like. I’ve never been shot myself, but I would imagine it feels like a searing hot pain that blasts through the body as the person’s insides are suddenly given egress and blood and other “stuff” comes bursting out. Again, I am only speculating. I could be totally wrong. Maybe this is only inspired by what I’ve seen on television. Still, the idea of it is horrifying to me. Especially when it involves already born children.

Last night, I happened to run across an argument two people were having about gun control. The argument became quite disrespectful and abusive in a hurry. I later found out that these two people had been friends for decades, but they had a fundamental disagreement over guns. One person argued that we need more gun control. The other argued that guns aren’t the problem; mentally ill people are the problem. Then they queried whether or not we should be banning motor vehicles, since they can also kill or hurt a lot of people.

I was observing the argument and it occurred to me how ridiculous the gun lover’s argument was. Cars are meant for transportation. Guns are meant for hurting or killing living things or– maybe– target practice. But a person doesn’t need an actual weapon to practice their aim. They could use a laser gun for that purpose. Guns are intended to hurt and kill. Cars are intended to get people from Point A to Point B.

Yes, cars have also been used to hurt people, too. The recent case of Darrell Brooks comes to mind, as he drove an SUV into a Christmas parade and killed six people, injuring another sixty-two. However, Mr. Brooks’ case is a relatively rare one. It’s not like dozens of angry, mentally ill people have decided to crash their cars into parades, or other public events. The only other incident I can think of off the top of my head took place in Charlottesville, Virginia back in the summer of 2017, when a young woman named Heather Heyer was killed by James Alex Fields, Jr., a right wing terrorist who deliberately drove his car into a crowd. Besides the one fatality, there were another 35 people injured, which is no small consideration.

Although I do believe that people who go on shooting sprees are often mentally ill, in a sense, I also want to point out that the vast majority of people with mental illness are not dangerous. These shootings, which often involve radicalized white, male, right-wing terrorists, aren’t typically the people one might find in a psychiatric hospital. I’ve also noticed that the same people who blame the shootings on the “mentally ill”, are also people who don’t seem to want to do anything to help the mentally ill. They don’t vote for affordable and accessible healthcare, nor do they want to be mandated to have health insurance. They’re all about their “freedoms”, but they don’t seem to realize that feeling the need to pack heat every time one goes out in public isn’t very “freeing”– especially for those of us who don’t want to be armed.

I’ve mentioned before that I find living in Germany quite liberating. There are far fewer people with weapons here, so there are a lot fewer stories about people being killed because they were in the wrong places at the wrong times. I like the fact that anyone who carries a weapon in Germany has to go through a lot to prove they can handle the responsibility. It’s way too easy for Americans to get guns, and way too hard for Americans to access mental healthcare… or regular healthcare, for that matter. To me, this problem seems very obvious.

I understand that some people think the horse is already out of the barn on this issue– there are so many weapons out there that it’s impossible to collect enough of them to make a difference. And some people really don’t feel safe without their Smith & Wesson strapped to their holsters. I wonder if it’s going to take them being personally affected by gun violence before they realize that more guns aren’t the answer to this problem. Even if it really is an issue of the mentally ill running amok, there’s still the problem of them getting guns so easily, so they can do real damage to people.

Audrey Hale owned seven guns, all of which were legally purchased. Because of that easy access to guns, six people are dead. Meanwhile, Tennessee is banning drag shows and forcing people to stay pregnant. When are we going to realize that mentally ill people and guns don’t mix? Hale had a history of receiving mental health services. I’m sure in that respect, healthcare privacy laws were respected, and no one asked questions when Hale bought weapons. If Hale had been pregnant and wanted to terminate the pregnancy, people in Tennessee would have had a lot more to say about it. It boggles the mind…

Anyway… it turns out that my friend who was engaged in an argument about gun control is no longer friends with the person with whom he was debating. The conversation spiraled out of control from the get go, and became offensive in a hurry. No one’s hearts or minds were changed, and a very long friendship seemed to come to an abrupt end. My friend told me that the end had been coming over the past few years… probably when Trump came on the scene. It’s sad to see friends and family members so polarized over what, to me, seems like a common sense issue. But when it comes to guns, some people really are “ammosexuals”. They can’t stop being attracted to that killing device, and the imagined powers it gives them… until they actually hurt or kill someone and have to answer for that in some devastating way.

Well, tomorrow is April Fools Day. Maybe I’ll have a cheerier topic to write about then. Have a good Friday, y’all.

I took the featured photo at a Mix Markt store a few years ago… it’s a depiction of another thing that doesn’t mix– guns and booze! But even in peaceful Germany, some people worship weapons!

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law, true crime

A routine traffic stop turns deadly… and now a man is on death row…

Yesterday, while we were waiting for Arran’s chemo appointment, I found myself watching a video about a true crime that happened in Tulsa, Oklahoma on June 29, 2020. I didn’t seek out this video and, in fact, hadn’t even heard of this case before yesterday. I landed on this video entirely by chance, and was about halfway through it before I realized how shocking this case is. It made me realize why police work is so very dangerous, even when it seems like a traffic stop is totally mundane.

It was about 3:00 am on that fateful June night. David Anthony Ware was driving a car that had expired tags. He also ran a stop sign and failed to yield to Officer Aurash Zarkeshan, who then turned on his lights to signal to Ware that he was being stopped. David Ware pulled over, and Officer Zarkeshan began to question him, asking for identification, proof of insurance, and other information. At first, the stop seems to be going on in a routine manner, although Ware is clearly eager to be on his way.

Zarkeshan checks Ware’s background and finds that he has a police record and is a convicted felon, which Ware claims was supposed to be expunged. Soon, Sergeant Craig Johnson is on the scene. Zarkeshan asks Ware to step out of the vehicle. Ware then becomes agitated and uncooperative. He demands to speak to Zarkeshan’s supervisor, who happens to be Sergeant Johnson. Johnson identifies as Zarkeshan’s boss, and demands that Ware get out of the car. Ware continues to refuse to get out of the vehicle, so Johnson starts to yell at him, his voice growing more and more forceful and angry. He threatens to use his Taser and Mace. In spite of that, Ware doesn’t comply, probably because he was a convicted felon, and he knew that if he got out of the car, the police would find his gun, and that would mean going to jail. If he was under the influence of drugs, that might have also contributed to his mental state.

I heard Sergeant Johnson’s insistent shouts turn to screams, as he uses profanity and deploys the Taser. Somehow, the device doesn’t manage to stun Ware into compliance, and neither does the Mace. Ware had prior drug charges and given that the Taser and spray weren’t effective, my guess is that he was under the influence of drugs during that stop. That would have also made him dangerous behind the wheel.

Ware then gets on his phone and calls his friend, Matt, who shows up as the traffic stop is truly escalating and both cops are trying to force Ware to get out of the car as he screams for help. Unfortunately, the police officers were so focused on getting Ware out of the car and Ware’s friend, Matt, on the scene, that they didn’t see Ware reach under the driver’s seat and pull out a handgun. Ware was able to fire a few rounds into the officers before they knew what happened. In the below video, the visuals are thankfully redacted, but you can hear Johnson start to say, “What the fuck.” as he realizes he’s been shot at close range. Ware shoots him again in the head. Zarkeshan was also severely wounded, but not killed, as Ware jumps into Matt’s car and leaves the two police officers for dead.

Ware’s friend, Matthew Hall, was charged with two counts of being an accessory to a shooting with intent to kill. He pled not guilty. Last year, Mr. Hall was convicted of both charges. He is now serving twenty-four years in prison. Prior to June 29, 2020, Mr. Hall had no criminal history. It just goes to show how, in a moment of poor judgment, a person’s life can be changed forever.

In May of 2022, Mr. Ware was convicted of the capital charge, first degree murder and shooting with intent to kill. He was also found guilty of shooting with intent to kill, possession of a firearm after former felony conviction, unlawful possession of a controlled drug with intent to distribute, and obstruction. I assume that “shooting with intent to kill” is separate from the capital charge, since a person can shoot another person, intending to kill them, but not actually succeeding in killing them. Ware did kill Sergeant Johnson, but he did not succeed in killing Officer Zarkeshan, hence the separate charge for his crime against the surviving officer.

At the end of Ware’s trial in April 2022, the jury recommended the death penalty. Judge William LaFortune agreed, and in May, Ware was sentenced to death, as well as life in prison for the shooting with intent to kill charge, 30 years for possession of a firearm after former felony conviction, 25 years for the drug possession charge, and one year for obstruction. There are also massive fines, which will probably never be collected. Ware was already scheduled for the death chamber in August of this year, but as is standard in these cases, there’s an automatic appeal. Ware’s attorney, Kevin Adams, filed documents in support of overturning the verdict. He said that in Oklahoma, there’s about a 50 percent rate of overturning death penalty punishments, while the prosecutor said that he hoped the penalty would “deter people” from disobeying law enforcement and using firearms against them.

Special thanks to the Line of Duty channel for sharing this video.

I played this video for Bill last night. Bill was horrified for the cops involved, and although he is mostly against the death penalty, he said he felt it might be justified in this case. Personally, I disagree, because I am more against the death penalty than my husband is. I really think it should be reserved for cases in which a person represents a truly severe danger to the public, such that releasing that person will result in more people being killed. Frankly, I would be more inclined to sentence someone like Darrell Brooks to death than David Ware. Brooks, to me, has obvious disdain for other people and clearly has no sorrow for what he did. He also killed more people in a less humane way, and injured dozens more people. That mindset won’t be fixed with rehab. I don’t think Brooks can redeem himself, as being the way he is is likely due to his personality. Ware, on the other hand, might be salvageable if he got clean.

Mr. Ware does not strike me as being as obviously cold and callous as Brooks is. Even though he could have avoided the escalation simply by complying with the cops, I can hear genuine fear and anguish in his voice as he screams for help. According to the US News & World Report:

“The truth is that when David Ware shot Officer Zarkeshan and Sgt. Johnson, he was in fear for his life,” Ware’s attorney Kevin Adams said. “Sgt. Johnson and Officer Zarkeshan beat David Ware, they kicked David Ware, they tased David Ware, they maced David Ware as he pleaded and begged for somebody to help him.

“And when it got to the point that he felt that he was about to lose his life, he shot Officer Zarkashan and he shot Sgt. Craig Johnson.”

Ware said that he meant to shoot the officers in their body armor in the hopes it would incapacitate them long enough for him to escape. But then he shot Sergeant Johnson in the head after both officers were on the ground.

Having watched and listened to the video a few times, I can agree with Kevin Adams that Ware “lost it” and the crime escalated because he feared for his life. Yes, he absolutely should have complied with the officers, and he should certainly be in prison for the rest of his life. But Ware probably hadn’t planned to hurt or kill anyone that night. He committed a driving infraction and was pulled over, and if his luck had been better, he would have gone home without taking anyone’s life. When he was threatened by the police officers, he probably did literally fear for his life. I’m not saying it was a credible fear that Ware would be killed by the cops, but I believe that he did experience that fear, and that influenced his extreme actions.

Darrell Brooks, on the other hand, clearly meant to hurt and kill people when he drove his SUV into a parade route at speeds up to 30 miles per hour. What he did was clearly premeditated, and he obviously had no fear or remorse whatsoever. He’s a very callous individual who seems to hate the world. To me, that indicates that Brooks is a lot more dangerous than Ware is. I think he would be a better candidate for execution than Ware is.

However, unlike Brooks, David Ware committed his crime in a red state, where the death penalty is strongly supported by the citizenry. He also killed a police officer, and in a lot of death penalty states, that will result in a death sentence. I doubt the death penalty in this case will deter anyone, though. These types of crimes often happen when someone is highly emotional and not thinking clearly. What might make this type of crime less likely to happen is if the United States got much more serious about gun control and limiting public access to weapons. But that will probably never happen in my lifetime. Even if it did, there are so many guns out there that it probably would take a long time before the public’s access to them would be diminished enough to make a difference.

I feel very sorry for Sergeant Johnson’s family, especially his wife and two children. He was clearly a brave man, and it’s obvious from the video that he didn’t want to use the Taser. He gave Mr. Ware multiple opportunities to comply, and warned him several times before deploying the Taser. Maybe it would have been better if he had been a little bit colder, and not given Ware a chance to prepare before popping him with the Taser. But I’m not a cop, so I really don’t know. And again, as is obvious from the video, there was a lot of emotion going on at the time of the shootings. All three of the men engaged in that fight were operating on high adrenaline and instinct, rather than rational thought. It’s truly a terrible thing that it turned out this way, as three men’s lives were forever altered and shortened, and one man’s life was ended way before his time should have been up.

Anyway… given how the death penalty is, my guess is that David Ware still has some time to spend thinking about what he’s done. I don’t think he intended to be a murderer, even though that’s how it worked out for him. If he hadn’t had a handgun in his car, he almost surely wouldn’t be on death row in Oklahoma. Darrell Brooks, on the other hand, strikes me as someone who would easily kill again if he ever walks free. Hopefully, the state of Wisconsin will keep Brooks put away for the rest of his life. And I have no doubt that Ware’s days as a free man are over, and he probably will be executed as planned.

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condescending twatbags, law, narcissists, true crime, YouTube

Darrell Brooks meets his match in “saintly” Judge Jennifer Dorow…

Recently, I’ve found myself watching a lot of court proceedings on YouTube. I can’t seem to help myself. I grew up at a time when there were a lot of dramatized court shows on TV. Then came Court TV, which I never had time to watch. Nowadays, you don’t even need cable TV to see these things unfold, almost in real time. I never thought there’d be a day when I could watch actual court cases progress on my computer, or that I would one day have a “smart” TV that could “talk” to my computer and beam these proceedings into my bedroom, as is the case in our current home.

YouTube shows me videos based on things I tend to watch. Although I’m no fan of Fox News at all, Fox News does show court proceedings. So that’s how I came to see the bizarre case of Darrell Brooks. Mr. Brooks, if you don’t know, is responsible for the Waukesha Christmas Parade Attack, which occurred November 21, 2021 in Waukesha, Wisconsin. On October 26, 2022, Mr. Brooks was convicted of six counts of first degree intentional homicide and 70 other counts related to the crimes that occurred on that terrible day.

On what was supposed to be a happy, fun, festive day last year, an eight year old boy died, as well as five members of the “Dancing Grannies” group. Sixty-eight other people were wounded as Brooks drove a red SUV through the crowd, allegedly reaching speeds of up to 30 miles per hour. Two weeks prior to his disastrous actions at the Christmas parade, Brooks was released from jail on a $1000 bond. He had been in jail on a domestic violence charge, and prosecutors later admitted that the amount of his bond was “inappropriately low”.

I remember hearing something about Brooks last year, when the attack occurred. However, because I am in Germany, I don’t always pay attention to things that happen in the United States. Besides, in recent years, there’s been such a depressing overflow of violence from my homeland that I guess I kind of tune it out now. It seems like there have been so many cases of school shootings, violence at public events like marathons, church services, and concerts. Every day, there’s more news about someone’s life being senselessly snuffed out by a violent crime of some sort. So I guess I can see why Brooks’ heinous actions didn’t really reach my attention until now, when I stumbled across his court proceedings on YouTube. I also know that I passed the videos several times before I finally clicked on one. Below is the first video I watched:

While the profanity was not appropriate in court, I’m sure many people agreed wholeheartedly with the sentiment.

I won’t lie. I love a good courtroom outburst, so that’s probably why I clicked. But after I clicked, I was hurtled down a massive rabbit hole. Darrell Brooks was facing very serious charges. And yet, he’s apparently such a narcissist that he felt qualified to defend himself in court. And folks, I gotta say, Darrell Brooks is no attorney. As I watched him try to use words he obviously doesn’t understand in an attempt to look educated, I couldn’t help but have great empathy for the endlessly patient and fair judge in this case, Jennifer Dorow. That woman is heroic on so many levels!

A screenshot of Judge Dorow’s beautiful smile.

I noticed some of the comments on that first YouTube video. One person posted, “Judge’s smile at 3:13 says it all, sorry for everyone that had to deal with this psycho and hope the victims’ families get some peace.” Sure enough, at that mark, we can see Judge Dorow smile. Frankly, to me, she looks positively elated. I’m sure that smile comes from knowing that the case is about done, and she doesn’t have to tolerate the frustrations of dealing with Mr. Brooks anymore. Or maybe she’s just smiling at the jury, who have also patiently listened to and observed Brooks outrageously carrying on in the courtroom, when they could be at home, frosting their bushes.

I have read that a lot of people have been so impressed by this judge that they’ve sent her thank you letters, flowers, edible arrangements and other gifts, including wine. She even got a telegram from one of her many new fans. The gifts are currently being quarantined at the county clerk’s office, as it would not be appropriate for the judge to receive them while Darrell Brooks is waiting for his sentence, which is scheduled to be handed down on November 15th. In fact, according to the article I linked, “ethics rules for judges and state employees generally prohibit acceptance of most gifts.” But still, it’s really something that people were so impressed by this judge that they felt moved to send her thanks.

One of many ugly faces made by Darrell Brooks as he has his day in court.

A few months ago, I got a little crush action going when I watched Judge Timothy Walmsley preside over the court case involving Travis McMichael, his father, Gregory McMichael, and William “Roddy” Bryan in Georgia. He just seemed like such an even keeled person, and I was very impressed with his sensible approach.

I don’t have a crush on Judge Dorow, but I am very, very impressed with her. She somehow managed to maintain her composure as Darrell Brooks talked over her, interrupted her, snarled at her, and accused her of misconduct. I have to admit that it was rare for me to actually finish any of the videos I started watching of Brooks, because listening to him speak pissed me off so much. I’m not generally a brutal person, and I don’t condone violence, but there were some times when I sort of ached for someone to punch Brooks, hard, in the mouth. He really is infuriating.

So disrespectful!

I wasn’t going to watch any more of Brooks trying to play lawyer, but then he made disturbing comments about being forced to wear shackles that were shocking his ankles. I had never heard of that, so I wanted to know more. Judge Dorow made it very plain that the restraints Mr. Brooks wore in court were not shock devices, as she also explained that it’s not in the public’s interest to be able to see them, as that would potentially create security risks for the sheriff’s office. Brooks, of course, loudly and vehemently screamed at the judge that the shackles were shock devices. It’s complete bollocks, of course.

A lengthy explanation about the shackles Brooks wore in court still doesn’t satisfy him as he screams at the judge again.

I’m not sure what’s up with the face mask. I don’t see anyone else wearing them in the courtroom, so I don’t know that they were required. Maybe he had to wear one because he was staying at the jail. Or maybe he saw wearing one as a form of power, since it hides some of his facial expressions. Either way, the mask makes me see Brooks as less human somehow, since it blocks his face and the non-verbal cues that come from one’s facial expressions.

He’s so uncooperative. It looks like this part of the case was proceeding in an empty courtroom, because Brooks was being so disruptive. Judge Dorow speaks of “muting” him, then removes the wall of boxes he put around himself, blocking him from view.

The below video was probably the most frustrating for me to watch, since Darrell Brooks clearly doesn’t know anything about law. Listening to him is a waste of time, because his comments don’t go anywhere, and he constantly raises objections that are pointless, non-applicable, or just plain stupid. And yet, there’s Judge Dorow, gamely plugging along, overruling Mr. Brooks’ objections repeatedly, and never quite making it to her boiling point. I think if I had been the judge in this case, I would have blown my top many times.

This one was especially frustrating… but at least we know that the trial is over and Brooks will soon be where he belongs.

I have never met Darrell Brooks. I don’t know anything about him, other than what I’ve seen in these videos. I know, having watched the videos, he’s not someone I would want to meet. I’m not a psychologist, but to me, it looks pretty certain that he’s some kind of sociopath or malignant narcissist. He doesn’t have any respect for the judge, or anyone else, whatsoever.

I’m sure he’ll appeal. Hopefully, another judge will have to deal with him.

Below is a news piece about this case… and how so many onlookers had the same impressions I did about Judge Dorow. She really is a “freaking saint”. If you’re going to watch any of these videos, that’s the one to see, as it serves as a nice conglomerate of the outrageous behavior Judge Dorow has patiently tolerated from Darrell Brooks throughout these proceedings. Her composure and resolve to keep her cool are extremely commendable.

Imagine being intimate with this man. He has children. He’s probably terrifying when he’s angry and not wearing restraints.

When I listen to Darrell Brooks speak and watch his facial expressions, I can’t help but realize that this is just a “civilized” version of what he must have been like in the free world. Imagine this man, enraged by something or someone, having the freedom to act in a physical way. Obviously, he’s capable, and that’s why he’s going to go to prison. Even with the face mask, we can see the rage in his eyes and furrowed brows, and hear the way he speaks to the judge. I’m sure the fact that she’s a woman is even more infuriating to Brooks, as it’s pretty obvious to me that he doesn’t respect women. And women who are powerful, like Judge Dorow, are especially likely to agitate him. I’m not especially big on prison, but some people really belong there. Darrell Brooks is obviously one of those people. He’s clearly very dangerous and has very poor control over his emotions and impulses. He’s belligerent and obstructive, and sadly, has just enough intelligence to be really infuriating. Like I said, I don’t condone violence, even in prison, but I suspect he’s going to repeatedly get the shit kicked out of him by other inmates. And he will probably really deserve it.

Anyway… much lauding and many kudos to Judge Dorow. She has clearly found her vocation in life. She deserves a vacation and a very happy holiday season for her good work. And while I don’t really want to see or hear Mr. Brooks speak again, I might tune in for his sentencing, as I watch Judge Dorow send his ass to prison for a much deserved terminal stay.

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