This morning, Bill made me aware of a disturbing story on the God page. I don’t follow God anymore, but sometimes if there’s a compelling or funny story, I will venture there manually to catch the buzz. And this morning’s scoop was literally buzzworthy (flies, y’all) and potentially stinky!
It seems that over the past ten years, 59 year old Matthew Guyette of Greenville, Ohio has been suffering the shitty intentions of his neighbor, 70 year old retired high school teacher, Jerry Detrick. Detrick admitted to the dirty deed when he was finally caught in the act of publicly taking a shit on Guyette’s yard at the “asscrack” of dawn… 3:15am on Sunday, May 30th. He’s also repeatedly urinated on Guyette’s lawn.
Guyette commented that he busted his neighbor, thanks to his new dog. He got up in the middle of the night to walk the pooch and literally caught Detrick with his pants down when he happened to glance over the hedge he shares with another neighbor. Again… this has been going on for over ten years!
According to The Smoking Gun, when Guyette confronted Detrick mid squat, the man simply stood up and walked away. Detrick was quickly identified when Guyette provided his description of the dastardly defecator to the police.
Why would Detrick “doo doo” such a thing? It can’t be good for neighborhood relations, right? Well… it turns out that Detrick is a Trump supporter, and Guyette and his husband are Biden supporters. Detrick told the police that was why he’d been on his serial pooping and running spree. He evidently thought he would get sympathy from the cops, who were unimpressed, and cited him for littering. Guyette notes that over 80 percent of the people of Greenville voted for Trump, so maybe Detrick thought the cops would be understanding.
But given that Detrick has been showing his ass for over TEN years and he openly admitted to being the culprit, I tend to think there’s more to the story. My guess is that Detrick may not approve of the gay lifestyle. He’s probably also a little bit crazy.
Detrick lives a couple of blocks from Guyette’s residence and walks past it often to visit his favorite bar (at least he doesn’t drink and drive). Guyette posted on Facebook about busting him, adding that the stealth shitter also has a habit of leaving the napkins he used to clean himself after dropping his deuces. Detrick is not a very neighborly guy, is he? But at least Guyette wasn’t his only victim. According to a Facebook comment Guyette made, Detrick’s targets also included the local museum and some of his other neighbors.
I took a peek at Matthew Guyette’s Facebook page. He seems to be taking this incident with a good sense of humor, which is highly commendable. He has left his post about this Trump supporting stealth shitter public. At this point, over three hundred people have dropped by to offer their thoughts. Some of the comments are hilarious!
I’ll be honest and say that when Bill told me about this, my first reaction was anger. I would be absolutely LIVID if someone did this to me, and I would be pressing full charges– to whatever extent I could. I also would have busted Detrick years ago, because it would have become an obsession for me. It’s the height of disrespect and completely uncalled for behavior. But I will admit that I can laugh about the story, because it is so bizarre. It also reminds me of why I really think a lot of Trump supporters are either crazy or stupid… or just plain disrespectful.
Reading about this reminded me of a story I blogged about from two years ago involving two guys who turned out to be Trumpers. On March 31, 2019, then 50 year old Charles Eugene Ferris, and Christopher Hicks, then 36, two guys in Rogers, Arkansas, were sitting in the backyard drinking beer when they got the bright idea to test out a bullet proof vest Ferris was wearing. Ferris asked Hicks to shoot him, and Hicks obliged. The shot hurt, and that pissed off Ferris, so he had Hicks try on the vest. Then Ferris shot Hicks.
When I read about this incident, I knew instinctively that these two “mental giants” were Trump supporters. There was nothing at all in the article about their politics. But I just KNEW these two supported the orange turd. Handling loaded firearms and experimenting with bullet proof vests, especially while also loaded on alcohol, just isn’t something most liberal types are likely to do. I realized I could be wrong, though. So I went searching for verification, and sure enough, I quickly and easily got it.
Someone who followed my OH Facebook page commented. She is a Trump supporter, but has some basic respect and class. Unfortunately, one of her friends didn’t like that I was sharing my opinions and left me a pretty rude comment. I wrote a lengthy rebuttal, with the serious question why normally decent and normal people would want to be affiliated with guys like Ferris and Hicks… and now Jerry Detrick, who scarily enough, was once a public school teacher. This was my closing paragraph on that piece:
…the point I’m making is that it was obvious to me that these two guys in Arkansas are Trump supporters. It’s clear by their stupid behavior that they are. I could tell without even getting confirmation from a Facebook page, although I did at least take the time to confirm it. If I can so easily tell which political leader a person supports simply based on their asinine behavior, it really says something about that leader, doesn’t it? Do you really want to be lumped in with those people? Think about it.
I emphasize that last sentence this time, because two years later, this theory I have about the correlation of crazy behavior and support for Trump has, yet again, arisen. It’s not about Trump being a “conservative”. He’s not really a conservative. He’s just someone who says and does outrageous things, and emboldens the crazies among us. Why would any reasonable or sane person want to be affiliated with people who shit on their neighbors’ lawns over their political choices? Why would you want to share politics with guys who get drunk, don bullet proof vests, and shoot each other? Guys… I knew these people were Trumpers without even knowing them personally, based ONLY on their ridiculous antics!
In fairness, though, I am also reminded of another story I heard about a few years ago, also involving a former public school employee. Back in 2018, Thomas Tramaglini was the superintendent of Kenilworth Public Schools in New Jersey. But then he got busted for repeatedly leaving piles of shit near Holmdel High School’s track and football field. Johnathan Martin, the cop who busted him was the school’s resource officer, who was on high alert when Tramaglini’s leavings were spotted on a daily basis. Martin was promoted to patrol officer last year.
Meanwhile, Tramaglini’s life has been pretty “shitty” since he was caught dumping and later pleaded guilty to one count of defecating in public. Tramaglini filed a lawsuit against Martin, Police Chief John Mioduszewski, Holmdel Township and other unspecified officers. The suit alleged that Martin unlawfully took a mugshot of the former superintendent and circulated it.
Tramaglini resigned from his job, which paid about $148,000 a year, and was subjected to harassment, as were his children and other family members. As to why he was shitting by the track when he could have used one of the portable toilets about 30 feet from where his crap was found, I don’t know… He claims he suffered from “runner’s diarrhea” and even produced a medical certification from a doctor. But he never offered any proof that he ever sought “help” for his problem until after he was caught on camera with his pants down. So obviously, it wasn’t something that greatly distressed him, even if the piles of excrement might have bothered those who later found it. I’ll admit that I can’t tell who Mr. Tramaglini supports politically… but he’s obviously got some issues with entitlement, hostility, disrespect… and, of course, excrement.
I previously wrote about Mr. Tramaglini on my original blog. That story was married with another one about a school in North Lebanon, Pennsylvania where students were being required to “smile” on demand or else. That school was also in the news because the school’s then Assistant Principal, Benjamin Wenger, along with High School Principal Jennifer Hassler and Middle School Principal Brad Reist, were also accused of throwing around a sex toy during school hours. I don’t know who those fine educators supported politically, either… but their conduct as “educators” is definitely questionable, unprofessional, and perhaps even execrable.
Anyway… I commend Matthew Guyette for not taking this shit lying down… and maintaining a sense of humor and compassion, despite his neighbor’s crappy attitude. Hopefully, now that Jerry Detrick’s dumping habits have been uncovered, he’ll clean up his act and learn how to use a toilet… preferably in private!