humor, music

Some of my friends get me perfectly…

One of my friends from college shared this hilarious video with me, knowing that I would love it…

Someone commented that they’d never heard such filth coming out of Santa’s mouth…

It took some doing to figure out to whom I should credit this video. Looks like it was done by the guy who runs the rekording channel on YouTube. Chris Franklin wrote the lyrics. They are too funny. I think my favorite line is “it spreads faster than a hooker’s legs.”

As I was fucking around on YouTube, I heard him do another song… Check him out. He’s got chops!

Take a breath! Take two!

Just now, a brand new friend shared this with me…

I guess it’s obvious how profane and twisted I am!

Shit. Now I’m feeling inspired to write a song parody. Why not? It’s cloudy and we can’t go anywhere anyway. And music gets me in less trouble than rants do…

We are blessed to have plenty of toilet paper and wine… Bill made homemade ravioli last night. Maybe I’ll write about it on my other blog. Why not? Hope you all enjoy these numbers. If I find any more, I’ll add them to this post.

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music, politics

Eric Schwartz does it again!

Back in the heady days of George W. Bush’s presidency, I was exposed to a wonderful singer-songwriter-guitarist named Eric Schwartz. He wrote and sang a hilarious song called “Keep Your Jesus Off My Penis”…

The sign language interpreter is adorable! If you watch any of the videos in this post, this is the one to see.

I subscribed to Eric’s YouTube channel after I heard this song the first time. I kept with him for awhile, but then he faded from my conscience because life happened and, back then, he didn’t seem to be very prolific. This morning, much to my delight, I saw that he has a new song out. It’s not as hilarious as the one that introduced me to his genius, but it still packs a punch…

I’m not surprised Eric dislikes Donald Trump… I fully support his message with this song.

Music is such a powerful instrument for spreading messages to the masses. Eric pretty much sums up my issues with Trump supporters, especially the ones who claim to be Christians. There is nothing about Donald Trump that champions what Jesus Christ taught. I don’t understand supposed Christians who support Trump’s sleazy politics, his constant lies, and flagrant disregard for everything from the environment to the checks and balances that were intended to prevent tyrants from taking over the country. I love that people like Eric Schwartz turn our collective frustration with U.S. leaders into clever songs with biting commentary. I don’t need to hear a moving speech. Give me well-played original songs with witty lyrics any day!

This one is a bit creepy.

I, myself, even got a little bit musical last night. It was dark, cold, and rainy yesterday, so we didn’t go out and do anything other than the usual chores. I sent Bill out to start my car, because I haven’t driven it in ages and figured the battery could use a charge. Sure enough, it was dead, so he has to go get jumper cables today at good ‘ol AAFES. I went on Facebook and invited song requests. Quite a few people were takers. I was a little surprised by that. So I did a bunch of songs… not that any were as cute and clever as Eric Schwartz’s, but some I’m kind of proud of. Since it’s dark and rainy today too, maybe today will also be musical for me. Too bad I never learned how to play guitar. Maybe it’s time I learned.

Maybe then I could write clever songs like this one…

Bill will be here a week, then he’ll leave again for another week. I hate this time of year. The weather is depressing and all I want to do is hibernate. But at least I have time to listen to songs by Eric Schwartz and the other brilliant musicians who share their original work on YouTube.

Damn… I can relate. I love his band, too.

I think it’s harder to get noticed as a musician than it is as a writer. Lots of people are afraid to give musicians a chance if there’s a choice. Sure, if you hear someone busking on a street corner, you may stop to appreciate it or stick your fingers in your ears… Sticking my fingers in my ears was what I always did when my dad sang church choir solos. A lot of people loved his voice, but not me. Consequently, I’m kind of shy about public performances, even though they make me light up on the rare chances I can do them. I put my stuff on the Internet, so people have a choice. Most people choose not to listen, and I can’t blame them. I feel the same way they do, although there are times when I am pleasantly surprised by someone’s talent. Eric Schwartz is one who never fails to pleasantly surprise me.

He plays keyboards too.

By the way… last night, someone suggested I sing a song by The Ramones. I don’t know many songs by them, but hell… maybe sometime I’ll give it a whirl. I’ve been known to do Led Zeppelin and AC/DC when the mood strikes. I also like to write parodies sometimes… and fiction, although I quit doing that last year thanks to interference from people who think they know what’s in my head.

Anyway… I hope those of you who are still reading my blogs will give Eric Schwartz a couple of views, especially if you’re not a fan of Republican politics. You might just enjoy his biting wit and satirical turns as much as I do.

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