This is kind of a weird post. I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately about the meaning of life and all… Using Boob’s picture again, because he looks so sheepish.
Earlier today, I reposted a blog entry from 2012. I originally wrote it on a Sunday morning, when for some reason, I had the Duggar family on my mind. I remembered how Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar would talk about how children are a “gift from God”, and they would always accept however many children God wanted them to have. On the surface, that seems like a nice plan. If you believe in God, and you think God has a plan for your life, maybe it does make sense to let the good Lord above plan your family. How many parents, when questioned by some busybody about the size of their family, can think of which child they wouldn’t have wanted to have?
But then the practical side of thinking jumps in to remind me that while children can be a blessing, they can also change a person’s life irreparably, sometimes for the worse. Raising children is a time and resource heavy commitment. Many times, things turn out beautifully. And sometimes, disaster strikes, such as it as with the families whose children go on to do terrible things. Recently, I watched a 20/20 special starring Sue Klebold, mother of Dylan Klebold, who was one of the school shooters at Columbine High School in 1999. Watching that video really put a human face on the parents of children who somehow go haywire.
I can’t even imagine what this woman has been through…
My own mom used to tell me about how she hadn’t planned for her children. She certainly wasn’t expecting me, when I showed up eight years after my closest sister, nor did she really want to have a fourth child. I used to be kind of hurt by those comments, and being a sensitive, yet talkative type of child, I would often tell others about it. One time, an aunt told my mom what I said, and my mom was embarrassed. She was angry that I had repeated her words, even though I was a child at the time, and it’s really hurtful to hear your mother say she didn’t want a fourth child. I think hearing that comment repeatedly when I was growing up really screwed me up in some ways.
Of course, now my mom is a different person. I think she really enjoys being on her own. These days, when I call her, she’s happy to hear from me. It’s as if those early years no longer exist. I like my mom. I always have. But she’s a lot easier to deal with at this time of our lives than she was when I was younger and needed her. Although she was always a God fearing woman, I don’t think she necessarily saw her children as “gifts from God”. She was never much of a “hands on” type. In my own experience, she basically left me to my own devices, most of the time. On the other hand, I don’t think she’d necessarily want to send any of us back.
So what does this have to do with the Duggars? Jim Bob Duggar is still apparently proud to call his eldest son Josh his own, even though it looks like Josh is on the way to the slammer. I can’t say I’d be surprised if Josh manages to get away with what he’s accused of doing. However, I also think it’s very likely that Josh will soon have a new address outside of society.
As most readers know, Josh Duggar is now on trial for some truly monstrous crimes. He is charged with receiving and possessing child pornography. These accusations have come from the federal government, and follow some truly sickening and troubling revelations from the past about Josh’s sexual proclivities. Personally, I think the accusations against him are probably true, but we’ll see what comes out as the trial progresses. It’s probably a good thing I live in Germany, where the coverage of this case isn’t everywhere. Instead, we’re just talking about COVID-19 mandates and the new government. It may be different without Mutti around.
Do the Duggars still think of Josh as a “precious gift from God”? Do they still think of Jill Duggar Dillard as a gift from God, even though she’s broken out of the toxic fold? It looks like most of Josh’s brothers and sisters are okay people. Or, at least they don’t have terrible issues with abusing women and children. Too many of them are “pro-life” and “pro-gun”, though, and that combination, to me, is kind of confusing. How is it that a person can be so focused on making babies, only to see them senselessly murdered by some gun toting nut or horribly abused by someone like Josh?
I’ve often wished abortion had been an option for my mom. Maybe she would have been happier if I hadn’t been born, even though I think I turned out okay. She did tell me that even if it had been legal the year I was conceived, she wouldn’t have done it. I think she thinks it’s immoral. I would submit that raising a child you don’t really want is also kind of immoral. Maybe she wanted me more than she realized.
I wanted to have a baby when I was a lot younger. Now, I think maybe it was a good thing I never did. I’ve seen a lot of people whose lives were permanently altered by children. Some people hit the jackpot and ended up with wonderful kids who are bright, talented, kind, and loving. And some people ended up with children who have done really terrible things. I guess, at least, we can’t say Josh has ever killed anyone… that we know of, anyway. There are worse men than him in the world.
I do think it’s interesting that in 2012, when I wrote today’s repost, I was thinking that Josie Duggar was the child who would cost the Duggar family the most. She was born very prematurely and had some significant medical issues. I have no idea if the Duggars have medical insurance, but all of the second hand buying, homemade laundry soap, and coupon clipping in the world won’t make a dent in hospital bills.
Now, I think that Josh is going to be the child who is the most expensive. He’s the reason the Duggars lost their lucrative TV show. He’s running up enormous legal bills. He cost four of his sisters their innocence. And he’s cost the family their reputation, although I recognize that the rest of the family– save for the parents– shouldn’t have to pay for Josh’s significant problems.
And I can’t say that I see Josh as a gift from God. I think if I were a Duggar, Josh Duggar would make me question that particular view. But he was their first.. and as I like to say, first children are sometimes turn out like first pancakes, especially when the griddle isn’t hot enough. Maybe Ma and Pa Duggar would have fared better with him if they’d waited longer to warm up the grill. Nah… they waited three years before making the disaster that is Josh Duggar. Who knew that years down the line, he would doom their family to infamy?
Anyway, if Josh goes to prison, Jim Bob still has his rekindled political career to focus on. Maybe he can make his mark on the world by being “pro-life” and “pro-gun” in Arkansas. Too bad he didn’t retire the gun that hangs between his legs.
Edited to add on December 8, 2021
This lady made a video that I think pretty much sums up my point in the post that begat this one. The Duggars weren’t satisfied with what they had. They pushed for more, and the kids suffered for it.
Michelle and Jim Bob Duggar are called to repentance. Dayum.
I hope everyone had a good Mother’s Day. Mine was spent alone. I was not in a great mood, although it was better last night than it was Saturday night. Fortunately for all of my loved ones and friends, I was alone to enjoy my misery. Well, the dogs were with me, but they don’t mind when I get a bit crabby.
I spent way too much time watching YouTube videos in bed. I saw a bunch done by Katie Joy (Without a Crystal Ball), then took the time to find out why she’s so controversial. People complain that she shoots her mouth off about things, says “defamatory” things and has even been sued for defamation, and she supposedly rips off Reddit threads. All of those things may be true. I still think she’s kind of interesting, although now that I’ve seen some of her work, I think I might find her interesting because of her speculation about the Duggar family. She watches them very closely and notices when things are “up”.
About a month ago, Katie Joy mentioned that the Duggars were acting “weird”. She had several theories as to why they were acting so strange. Think about it. Two sons got married in the span of just a few weeks– Justin Duggar married Claire Spivey and Jedidiah Duggar married Katey Nakatsu. Both weddings were, by Duggar standards, very private. By normal people’s standards, they were just kind of private. Katie Joy was able to live stream Jed’s wedding and report on it as it was happening. Naturally, People Magazine ran wedding announcements and photos. But this was still strange behavior by Duggar standards, and Katie Joy rightfully realized there was something rotten in Tontitown. However, I don’t think any of us had a clue about the seriousness of what was about to go down.
TLC cameras supposedly weren’t around to film the nuptials. That seems ominous to me, since even if they were thinking of canceling the show, one would think TLC would at least film these major events just in case they didn’t. Sounds like maybe a death knell is sounding for Counting On and the rest of the Duggar shows. I think Josh’s perversions have finally driven people to the point of lasting disgust.
Last night, as I was lying in bed about to fall asleep, I happened to see the below photo, which was shared to the Duggar Family News page…
I wonder if Elizabeth Davis is cringing yet.
Back in 2011, when Michelle had just miscarried the “doomed” 20th child, Jubilee Shalom, I kind of “lost” a longtime female friend over the Duggars. People on my Facebook page were discussing Michelle’s miscarriage and one guy, no longer a friend because several years later, he took issue when I later pointed out his misogynistic comments about Natalie Maines, cracked a tasteless quip about “19 kids and no longer counting.” My female friend– still technically a Facebook friend, but she no longer “talks” to me– got upset and shamed everyone for being insensitive to Michelle Duggar’s pain at losing a baby. This friend had publicly expressed that she “loved” and “admired” the Duggar family. Or, at least their public visage.
I was a bit annoyed by my friend’s shaming comments, and I wrote that I thought it was shitty that Michelle Duggar kept having babies, despite having so many young children who still so desperately needed her, and in spite of almost dying during her previous high drama pregnancy with Josie Duggar, who was born VERY prematurely. I thought it was very irresponsible and selfish for her to be having her 20th baby when she still had a medically fragile toddler (Josie) who needed her mother so much, in spite of all the sister-moms who were around to look after her. My “friend” deleted her comments. She didn’t unfriend me, but she doesn’t engage with me anymore.
Over the years, I’ve wondered if my old friend still “loves” the Duggar family so much that she’d ditch a longtime friend for them. Or maybe the Duggars were just an excuse. The truth is, she and I are very different, and we have rather divergent opinions about almost everything– especially politics. It’s a pity, though, because there was a time when we were good friends and had a lot of fun riding horses together.
So this morning, I woke up and checked Facebook. I was actually feeling okay, because Arran let me sleep until almost 5:00am. That’s a rare and beautiful thing, especially when Bill isn’t home. The first thing I saw was a now deleted comment that we should leave Josh alone because he’s getting “help”. Naturally, that comment caused a flood of indignant responses about what a piece of shit Josh is and how he deserves to be abused when he’s in prison. The person who made the inflammatory remark never came back to the discussion. Frankly, based on the deluge of angry and insulting comments she got, I can’t really blame her for not responding. I don’t agree with what she wrote– that Josh should be “left alone” and that he’s getting “help”– but I do think people should try to be more civilized when they interact on the Internet. Piling on someone and being rude isn’t a good way to get them to communicate. In fact, that’s a good way to squelch communication– and it’s hard to learn new things when people aren’t communicating.
Many people were saying Josh Duggar is scum of the earth and ought to be crucified. I understand the sentiment. However, I try to keep in mind that he still has a right to a fair trial. He hasn’t yet been proven guilty beyond a shadow of a doubt. Anyone in Josh’s situation, and anyone who presumably loves and depends on Josh (ie; his soon to be seven innocent children and his long suffering wife) would want for him to have a fair and impartial adjudication. You and I would certainly want a fair trial for ourselves and/or our loved ones. I can’t blame Josh for getting the best lawyers and experts he can afford to defend himself. I’m sure he will pursue every avenue. If I was in his shoes, I would do the same. On the other hand, I don’t have any plans to hang out on the Dark Web.
Moreover, while I definitely don’t think Josh is a good person at all, I also don’t think Josh is the worst person on the planet. I can think of quite a few people who are much, much worse by far. For instance, I think Larry Nassar is a lot worse than Josh is… although given more time, I think Josh could easily approach Larry’s grossness. Larry Nassar sexually abused hundreds of elite female athletes in the name of providing “medical treatment”. To my knowledge, Josh hasn’t yet approached the sheer volume of victims Nassar has. That doesn’t mean he wouldn’t try if he had the opportunity, but he’s not there yet, as far as I know. Also, Josh hasn’t killed anyone, nor have I heard of anyone killing themselves because of Josh’s actions. Nassar, on the other hand, is partially responsible for at least one suicide… maybe even two, if you consider that his former sidekick, John Geddert, recently committed suicide as the law was closing in on him. He’s probably also not as repugnant as Jeffrey Epstein was… at least not yet. Maybe they’re cut from the same cloth. Jeez… as I sit here, I can think of a bunch of really awful men who used to be thought of as okay… Donald Trump, Bill Cosby, O.J. Simpson, Jared Fogle… the list goes on and on. And those people aren’t even mass murderers. If you think about it, Josh is in the company of a whole lot of reprehensible humans with penises.
Found in the files on Josh’s computer was a reportedly horrifying video called “Daisy’s Destruction”. I have not looked up this video, but I have heard people talking about it on YouTube. I also saw someone post the general specifics of what it’s about. Make no mistake about it. Based on the very limited knowledge I have of it, it’s definitely not something decent people want to be viewing. However, while I think anyone who enjoys watching such a video is totally vile, much viler still are the people who produced and distributed it. I don’t want to go into specifics of what’s in the video or the generalities of what it took to make it. Suffice to say that to make this video, some extremely horrible, inhumane, and heartbreaking things happened… things that are just unconscionable. Anyone who enjoys viewing that kind of material is, for sure, extremely sick and depraved. But I don’t think people who view the video are worse than the people who dreamed it up, made it for public consumption, and shamelessly raked in all of the money the sick and depraved are willing to pay for it. I think the people who make and sell this stuff are worse than the people who consume it.
I also disagree with people who think Josh should be abused or killed by other inmates. I certainly don’t condone what Josh has admitted to doing in the past, or what he’s allegedly done more recently. I wouldn’t blame other inmates for wanting to hurt or kill him, simply due to what’s been reported about him. However, it’s not the inmates’ place to exact justice on others. Ideally, people in prison should be focused on paying for their own crimes, rather than punishing others. Moreover, while I personally believe Josh Duggar is probably beyond rehabilitation and he clearly has issues with harming women and girls, I don’t know that for certain. All I know is what I’ve seen and read in the media, what I know from my formal studies, and what I know from personal experience. I suspect I’m right about him, but I don’t know him personally. I’ve only seen the whitewashed version of his life on TV and the more salacious items that have been in the news.
I have always believed Josh Duggar’s parents are, at least in part, to blame for the fact that he’s so fucked up. It’s pretty plain that Josh had problems way before he was an adult. The Duggars’ response was to tell him to repress his sexuality (but offering no real help), avoid all sin, and do hard labor. They did nothing to help the victims of Josh’s abuse, but instead pressured them to forgive and forget and sweep it all under the rug so Jim Bob could get rich and famous on reality TV. I heard them say they were looking to the Lord, but their actions didn’t match their words. That’s pretty far from Christlike behavior, even though I hear them “praising God and Jesus” all the time, and cringe when I hear Michelle’s highly irritating baby voice. Maybe Josh would have still been the person he is if his parents had done more to help him, but at least if they’d tried to get him real help as well as hold him (and him ALONE) accountable for what he did to his sisters and the babysitter, he might have had a chance to become a better person.
I want to share a few interesting TikTok videos I just watched. Someone calling herself “Lawyer Carrie” just brought up a point that I think a lot of people haven’t considered. I hadn’t considered it myself, mainly because it never occurred to me. Before this morning, I had never heard of “glitter bombing“. Check this out…
I have heard of the Dark Web, because Bill got a master’s degree in cybersecurity. It’s a world I don’t want to access, but it’s not illegal to be there.
Josh Duggar is a fraud and a massive hypocrite. He’s definitely got serious issues. Anyone who listens to him is liable to come away with the idea that Josh is a smarmy, fake, narcissistic creep, and that’s not even knowing what he did to his sisters and his alleged issues with receiving and possessing CP. That being said, he’s one person among an ever expanding group of really bad people. He’s probably not the worst of the worst… yet, anyway.
This video is a load of crap that hasn’t aged well. Wonder if the interviewer is eating his words yet.
That being said, I do think it’s possible that Josh told the truth when he said someone “sent” the videos to him. When the Feds came to talk to him, Josh allegedly asked if someone was downloading CP to his computer. It sounds like if he wasn’t himself accessing the images, it’s possible he was threatened by someone and that person carried out their threats. Some people are saying that the fact that he brought that up is damning, but personally, I think if he was really viewing CP, he would be more tight-lipped about it. I definitely think this is a theory that should be thoroughly investigated, if it hasn’t been already. However, I have also read that over 90% of federal charges lead to convictions. So, the chances of Josh getting off are probably pretty small. I do think he’ll get some time in prison.
Could it be the case for Josh? Maybe…
Lawyer Carrie on TikTok has pointed out that they only found three days worth of images on one computer. It does occur to me that if Josh was really addicted and a hard core user, he probably would have a lot more bad stuff– more than just three days’ worth–, and there would be evidence of heavier usage than what has been reported. I also think he certainly could be the type of person who would piss someone off on the Dark Web and they might try to get revenge by “glitter bombing” him. The Dark Web is not known for its fair and law abiding citizens. The very fact that Josh was hanging out there is shady enough. No, it’s not illegal to be on the Dark Web, but many of the people hanging out there are up to no good and a lot of crimes get their start there. It’s possible Josh screwed someone over financially and they got back at him by pinning him with CP. But, like I said… simply hanging around on the Dark Web is suspicious and shady enough. It’s not a place where law abiding people tend to hang out much.
The fact that Josh was on the Dark Web is definitely questionable, and makes me think he’s definitely guilty of something. But… as slimy and revolting as Josh is, I do think there is a chance that someone was getting revenge on him for some reason. That doesn’t mean I think he’s completely innocent, a good person, or that he should be completely exonerated. But I do think that because he’s never been convicted of a crime before, has access to expensive lawyers and computer experts, and there may be a motive for someone to fuck him over, he might not get the decades in prison that a lot of people are hoping he gets. And I wouldn’t blame him for taking his best shot at beating the charges.
I do wonder if any of the people who used to defend the Duggars are eating their words yet. But then, I don’t think they should be too hard on themselves. The Duggars have fooled a whole lot of decent people for years. I’m sure there’s a whole lot of stuff under the surface that could come out, now that the perfect Christian facade is slipping. I feel sorry for the innocent children who are associated with this ugliness… especially Josh’s children, who are probably going to be paying dearly for the rest of their lives for their father’s reputation.
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