true crime, videos, YouTube

YouTube introduces me to another compelling prison v-logger…

The unaltered featured photo comes courtesy of Wikimedia Commons

I have always loved reading and hearing true stories. When I was growing up, I also loved reading fiction. I think I lost my love for reading most fiction when I was an English major in college. It was further eradicated when I lived in Armenia and most of the only reading material available in English was of the trashy romance novel type. I was so desperate to read something in English that I read the bodice rippers, anyway. I found a lot of the romance novels kind of depressing, probably because I didn’t have a love life to speak of in those days.

Nowadays most of my reading is all about biographies, autobiographies, current events, and the like… I like documentaries, too. There are still a couple of fiction authors I enjoy, but I have so many non-fiction books that I stay pretty busy… especially since I tend to fall asleep pretty quickly when I read these days. I need to buy a chair for reading, because I usually try to read in bed and it’s not long before I’m dead to the world.

I think my tendency to fall asleep when I read has also led to me watching more YouTube videos. YouTube has caused me to discover other true stories… many of which would have never been told in days past. YouTube can also offer a new beginning to people who otherwise might not have ever had one.

Take, for instance, Jessica Kent. She’s a popular YouTuber who has a channel all about her experiences in prison. I discovered her via Mama Doctor Jones, an OB-GYN who makes really excellent videos about women’s health issues. Someone asked Dr. Jones to react to Jessica’s video about giving birth when she was incarcerated in an Arkansas prison. I was so impressed by Jessica’s heartbreaking story that I checked out her channel and subscribed. In the old days, Jessica might not have been able to carve out a successful career after being in prison. But now, she has a thriving channel with 992k subscribers. She creates original content that people find compelling. I assume that’s allowed her to live a more law abiding life.

Jessica Kent has carved quite a career out of YouTube…

I write that “I assume”, because I really don’t know. She did make a few videos recently indicating that she’d had some issues lately with her (apparently former) significant other. I don’t want to speculate too much on the details, except to state that I think it’s pretty hard to go straight after an experience like prison. Jessica has a lot of empathy for prisoners, which is totally understandable. She was one herself. But a lot of people who have been incarcerated were incarcerated for good reason.

While many prisoners are basically decent people, the truth is, the majority of them did something that put them behind bars. They don’t always learn their lessons when they’re behind bars, which can make consorting with them risky, even if they seemed to have turned over a new leaf. See my book review on Shannon Moroney’s book about her ex husband, sex offender Jason Staples, for more on that.

Christina Randall is also a popular prison v-logger. She has 1.38 million subscribers, and covers true crime topics as well as her own experiences being incarcerated in Florida. I don’t watch her channel as much, but it looks like lately, she’s been focusing on recent true crime cases in the media, rather than telling her own stories. I know she and Jessica Kent have also collaborated. Personally, I prefer hearing the true stories from the people themselves, which is why I don’t follow Christina’s channel. But obviously, she’s compelling, and she has a lot of dedicated followers. If that keeps her out of prison, I say “more power to her”.

One of Christina’s videos about her own experiences.

Lately, I’ve been watching another channel, this time by a guy named “jumpsuitpablo”, who spent ten years in prison in South Carolina. He’s an up and coming YouTube talent, with 27.1k subscribers, at this writing. I find his content very compelling for a few reasons. First, I think he has a really nice speaking voice. It’s pleasant to listen to. He’s intelligent, and a good storyteller. Secondly, I lived in South Carolina for three years, so I’m interested in his experiences doing time in that state. And thirdly, he covers Alex Murdaugh. I don’t actually care that much about Murdaugh’s case, but that was what initially hooked me to jumpsuitpablo’s channel. I kept getting YouTube suggestions for the channel, based on Murdaugh’s case.

Alex Murdaugh’s case is a reminder that the mighty can fall pretty rapidly. Murdaugh was once a very successful attorney living the high life in South Carolina. Now, he’s a convict, being evaluated before he gets shuffled off to do his time. It so happens that jumpsuitpablo has actual experience being incarcerated in the same prison where Murdaugh is, and he knows people who are still there. So that gives him access to some very interesting content. But jumpsuitpablo also shares his own stories from his days as a prisoner. It’s fascinating stuff.

This is quite a harrowing story.
Yikes!
Then, when you get out, become a v-logger…

I guess in the old days, before we had YouTube, these folks might have written books about their experiences. But it takes a lot of time to write a book, and back before the Internet, it wasn’t so easy to get published… even if you self-published. Nowadays, anyone can write a book, or become a video star, or even a music star. I know some people lament this form of progress, because it makes it harder for people who do things the “old-fashioned” way. But frankly, I’m glad to see people who were once incarcerated making money in a legal way. I also think their experiences matter, and they have stories that ought to be told, and HEARD, by regular folks.

Like many people, I used to assume that the incarcerated were all dangerous, bad people who deserved what they were getting and more. That was an opinion based in ignorance, and perhaps on what I had seen and heard on television or read in books. YouTube videos that star actual convicts put human faces on the prison experience. No, I don’t condone what prisoners have done to get locked up, but I also realize that there but by the grace of God go I. It’s very easy to get arrested and/or locked up in the United States. All you have to do to realize that is to watch one of the many cop videos on YouTube.

I’m sure this guy never thought he’d get busted…

When I watch the cop videos, I tend to vacillate between feeling sorry for the police (because the public can be incredibly disrespectful), to feeling really sorry for the arrestees (because cops can also be incredibly disrespectful). I often yell at the cops, too, because a lot of them genuinely appear to be on power trips and blatantly deny people their civil rights. On the other hand, a lot of people are total assholes and have no respect for the law, or other people’s safety or property. I probably shouldn’t watch as many videos as I do, for the sake of my blood pressure… but they are so compelling! And I have a pretty boring lifestyle, so I tune in and enhance my knowledge of true crime. 😉

I definitely don’t think I could stand to go to prison, but obviously, I probably would adapt. It appears that most people do. Some people adapt better than others do. Some people even become institutionalized, and can’t function outside of prison. We’ll never see any videos from those people.

I’ve seen other prison v-loggers, too, but to me, their content isn’t as interesting or professionally done. Which just goes to show you that it takes talent and skill to make good content. It’s too bad prison is what led some of these folks to their YouTube careers. Maybe under different circumstances, they would have been able to avoid those unfortunate experiences. Obviously, they survived, but there are lingering costs associated with going to prison. I sure wouldn’t do it to boost my own very modest and tiny YouTube channel (with 130 subscribers).

Anyway, if you find prison content interesting, I’d especially recommend watching jumpsuitpablo’s channel. His content is very interesting, and I’d like to see him stay out of prison. I also recommend Jessica Kent and Christina Randall, although I haven’t been keeping up with their channels as much lately. If anything, these folks remind me to stay on the straight and narrow path.

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celebrities, Duggars, healthcare, religion, YouTube

Why is the Internet freaking out over Jessa Seewald’s miscarriage?

This morning, I’ve watched two videos about Jessa Duggar Seewald, and her recent miscarriage at 12 weeks gestation. I wasn’t going to comment on this, but now that I’ve seen the videos, I feel compelled to chime in on this controversy.

Jessa’s video. She really has beautiful children.

Jessa, for those who don’t know, is one of the 19 kids who was on 19 Kids and Counting, a defunct reality show on the TLC network that chronicled the lives of JimBob and Michelle Duggar, and their 19 children. In 2014, Jessa married Ben Seewald, and together they have four adorable children– two boys, and two girls. Ben works as a pastor, and Jessa makes YouTube videos. Recently, she made one about losing her latest pregnancy over the holidays. After she had her miscarriage, she had a dilation and curettage procedure, popularly known as a D&C. This is the same procedure some people have when they have abortions. Miscarriage is, in fact, known in medical parlance as a “spontaneous abortion”.

In the wake of Jessa’s news, a lot of people on the Internet have been freaking out about the fact that she had a D&C. A number of media outlets have been reporting about Jessa’s miscarriage. I’m no longer on Twitter, but I’ve heard that comments there have been particularly brutal, with many pro choice activists figuratively shrieking that Jessa did, in fact, have an abortion.

And yet, in the past, Jessa has publicly compared abortion to a “Baby Holocaust”, implying that people who seek abortion care are Nazis. Naturally, people were outraged by the comparison and haven’t forgotten that she said that. In fairness to Jessa, though, she said it in 2014, a year after her mother, Michelle, also said it at a pro-life rally in Texas. This was before we all knew about Josh Duggar, and his disgusting sex pest proclivities. At the time, the Duggars were still somewhat respected by some people.

Those of you who read my blog regularly probably already know that I am vehemently pro-choice. I think pregnant people should be allowed to have abortions when they need them. It’s not my business why they might want or need to terminate a pregnancy. I’ve got my own uterus, so I don’t need to mind theirs. And while I’m 50 years old and no longer have to worry about unintended pregnancies, I very much believe in the right to choose whether or not to be pregnant. In “parts passing”, I’ve already explained in detail why I am so much in favor of legalized abortions. It mostly has to do with privacy, but I’ve also seen what happens when people have babies they aren’t ready to raise.

I think Jessa’s previous comments about abortion are repugnant. I completely disagree with her assertion that abortion is akin to a Holocaust. I think that statement demonstrates a stunning lack of understanding or compassion toward what people suffered during the real Holocaust. I also think it reveals a complete dearth of common sense or compassion toward those who need abortion care, regardless of the reasons– some of which are very much medical in origin.

That being stated, I don’t agree with the assertion that Jessa had an elective abortion. She had a medical procedure that can be used to effect an abortion, but it can also be used in other circumstances that don’t involve pregnancy. Moreover, she did not elect to end her pregnancy. She had a “spontaneous abortion”– a miscarriage. And when she had the D&C, she was already losing the pregnancy. Since she has a history of bleeding, doctors determined that waiting for the miscarriage to complete at home would not be a medically sound decision. But make no mistake– the pregnancy was ending, and she would not be having that baby.

I completely understand the outrage surrounding the complete right wing craziness in the United States right now. Over the past few days, I’ve heard about people boycotting Hershey’s chocolate because they used a transgender woman to promote Women’s Day. Hypocritical Tennessee Governor Bill Lee has just signed legislation banning drag shows in Tennessee. And of course, we already know what’s happened to a woman’s right to choose abortion in a number of states. There have been a number of frightening after effects of that change in policy. People are rightfully pissed off about the erosion of women’s rights, as well as those of other communities that have historically been marginalized.

But… accusing Jessa Seewald of having had an elective abortion isn’t truthful or useful. She didn’t have an abortion. She had a D&C, which isn’t always abortion related. Her pregnancy was ending before she had the procedure. And regardless of how one might feel about Jessa’s religious and political beliefs, she’s still a human being. I would not wish a miscarriage on anyone. I’ve never experienced one myself, but I can only try to imagine the grief, especially if the pregnancy was a happy development. It’s just plain wrong to use someone’s miscarriage as a weapon against them.

Both Mama Doctor Jones and Fundie Fridays addressed Jessa’s situation this week. Mama Doctor Jones’s video was entirely about Jessa, while Jen’s Fundie Fridays video addressed Jessa as just part of her commentary on recent Duggar news. Both of these ladies expressed views that I wholeheartedly agree with regarding Jessa’s situation, as well as the need for legalized and private abortion care. I would highly recommend watching both of their videos if you want more information about what happened.

I highly recommend watching the whole video… especially the last minute or so. Mama Doctor Jones sums it up beautifully.
A slightly less sympathetic view than Mama Doctor Jones’s, but still one worth considering.

Yes, it’s true that the procedure Jessa had is being denied to other women who want or even need it, thanks to abortion bans. But being mean to Jessa is not going to change her position on the abortion issue. This is a woman who openly compared abortions to the Holocaust. Anyone capable of making that kind of statement is probably not going to be swayed by Internet outrage. Remember, Jessa was raised in a cult, and her beliefs have been shaped by fundamentalist Christianity. She hasn’t been exposed to a lot of different viewpoints, and in fact, her livelihood literally depends upon promoting strong fundie Christian beliefs. If she started talking about abortion rights, her husband would probably lose his job… and her father would probably disown her. He’s already shown that he’s fully capable of shunning any kids who go against him.

I think the best thing to do is have compassion, grace, and understanding. Indeed, that is what Jesus Christ himself would do. I totally get the furor over the loss of abortion rights, but all being mean to Jessa does is promote the us vs. them mentality. I do hope that Jessa’s experience will plant some seeds of wisdom and perspective within her. Sometimes, pregnant women do need to be able to terminate a pregnancy. They should be able to make that decision without any input from non-involved people, and do what is best for themselves.

Right now, it’s true that women are being refused the healthcare that Jessa was privileged enough to access, and that is a point worth mentioning. But we should do it in a way that reflects kindness, decency, and compassion, not vitriol and outrage. Let’s just keep championing the importance of having the right to choose and healthcare privacy.

So ends today’s sermon… Now to put on some clothes and go out into the world.

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Military, modern problems, true crime, Virginia

Mass shootings in the United States have become almost banal…

The featured photo was on Facebook last night. There was a time when I would have found it funny, but I have to admit that I was actually a little triggered seeing it… Given all of the gun violence these days, it’s hard for me to laugh at jokes involving weapons, even if the actual joke is about men peeing and missing the toilet. But at the same time, I no longer feel “shock” when I read or hear another story about someone dying due to another person’s hatred, rage, and inability to control their violent impulses.

Yesterday morning, I was reading about the terrible mass shooting incident at Club Q in Colorado Springs, Colorado. There were many people at the club, there to have a good time watching a drag show. Suddenly, 22 year old Anderson Lee Aldrich burst into the venue and started shooting, eventually killing five people and wounding at least 19 others. He was tackled by Richard Fierro, a man who spent fifteen years as an Army officer and went on four combat tours to Iraq and Afghanistan. Mr. Fierro left the service in 2013, just a few years before he would have been eligible for retirement. I don’t know the circumstances of why he left the military. My guess is that the repeated war zone deployments had a lot to do with it.

On Saturday, November 19th, 45 year old Mr. Fierro had gone to Club Q with his wife, daughter, and his daughter’s boyfriend, who would sadly perish in the chaos that erupted that night. The family was having a good time watching Fierro’s daughter’s friends perform in a drag show, when Aldrich ruined everyone’s evening with his AR-15. Without a single thought, Fierro leapt out of his seat and charged toward the hulking young man, said to weigh at least 300 pounds and wearing body armor. The combat veteran tackled the gunman, throwing him to the ground as the AR-15 clattered out of his reach. Aldrich pulled out a pistol, which Fierro immediately relieved him of and began beating the shit out of Aldrich with the gun until he was bloody. Another man grabbed the AR-15, while a drag queen stomped on the man with her high heels.

As the wife and the daughter of men who went to war, I have seen what time in a literal war zone can do to a person’s psyche. Fierro went into action because of his training, and because he spent a long time in combat, training himself to go on autopilot when violence erupts. He didn’t think. He simply reacted to the indoctrination that he had to kill or be killed. This is an instinct that never really leaves a person. I saw it in my father, who went to Vietnam and came home with post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). My husband, Bill, also spent time in Iraq during the war. Fortunately, he wasn’t involved in any war zone violence; he just had to work with a malignant narcissist, which was certainly triggering enough. But there were still some lingering effects from his time downrange. War changes people.

In this case, it was a lucky thing that Mr. Fierro had been to war and had the reflexes and will to take action. He is a genuine hero. However, I know that this incident will traumatize him. He’s not at home enjoying his hero status. I know that all he wanted to do was go out with his family, and have a good time. He never should have had to use those sharply honed war zone skills again. He did enough for his country, having earned two Bronze Stars. And now, he’s going to have to live with the trauma of what happened at the Q Club, where people had just wanted to dance and have a good time. I fear that he’s never going to feel safe again… not that he necessarily did before this tragic incident occurred. I pray that he’s able to access adequate mental health services. I’m sure he’s going to need them.

Bill and I talked about Mr. Fierro over breakfast yesterday, not knowing that today, November 23, 2022, we’d be hearing about another incident. This time, it happened at a Walmart in Chesapeake, Virginia. I happen to know Chesapeake, because I grew up about an hour away from there. I have friends who live there now. This morning, my friend Mary Beth posted on Facebook about a shooting in her town… and then I saw the news.

Not to be outdone by Anderson Lee Aldrich, a man believed to be the store manager at a Walmart in Chesapeake, opened fire in the store and killed six people and injured more before killing himself. The man who did this has not yet been named, as, at this writing, the crime happened only a few hours ago. It does appear that, at this point, the man acted alone. Naturally, there are a lot of “thoughts and prayers”, which do fuck all to stop the violence. I guess it sounds nice to offer up prayers… but what good are prayers when someone suddenly loses their parent, child, or friend to gun violence?

Leo Kosinski, a spokesman with the Chesapeake Police Department, said “I mean it’s sad, you know we’re a couple days before the Thanksgiving holiday.” As if it wouldn’t be just as sad in the middle of September or March? Okay, I guess a mass shooting does cast a sad pall on the holiday, especially for those who lost loved ones in these horrific attacks. Still, I find that statement kind of shocking in its banality. I think a lot of us are just numb to the violence. I haven’t set foot in the United States in 8 years. I haven’t seen most of my family in the time I’ve been away. You’d think I’d miss being “home”, but home is becoming less recognizable by the year, as more people go off the rails and kill perfect strangers with high powered weapons.

Meanwhile, there’s a whole contingent of people who are hellbent on forcing women to gestate, no matter what. And there’s no shortage of internet based idiots who want to argue– even with board certified OB-GYNs like Mama Doctor Jones– about what constitutes abortion. I ran into one of those idiots last night. She was relentlessly arguing with people about this subject… shaming Mama Doctor Jones for correctly referring to treatment for an ectopic pregnancy as an abortion. That is PRECISELY what it is, by the way. Abortion is not a dirty word. But these folks refuse to understand that, and they want to pass barbaric laws that will KILL women. Or force them to birth babies they aren’t ready to raise… which will lead to a childhood potentially full of poverty and abuse, as well as escalating violence from gun toting right wing nuts. Below is what one idiot posted to Mama Doctor Jones’ Facebook post about treating ectopic pregnancies. She was taking on all comers, berating them for pointing out her lunacy.

Abortion is directly related to the uterus. Literally. Once you started with that lie that treatment for ectopic pregnancy is abortion in order to minimize actual induced abortions, I stopped watching. Do better.

Reading these kinds of moronic comments enrages me… but still, even as angry as I get at people who want to deny freedom of choice to women and spread LIES, I don’t wish for them to be blown away by the gunfire from an AR-15. How is it that the people who claim to value the lives of the unborn so much, are so unwilling to do a fucking thing about the gun toting wackjobs? And they want to send people like my father, my husband, and Richard Fierro into war zones, so that they come back traumatized to the point at which they willingly hurl themselves into violence?

I haven’t even addressed the recent gun violence at the University of Virginia, where three football players were murdered by a former football player who opened fire in a garage. Yeah, I saw the headlines and the photographs of three smiling young Black men, wearing their orange and blue striped neckties. But again… I feel so numb. Because there have been SO MANY shootings. A person in the United States can’t even go to the damned grocery store nowadays without having to worry about being shot! And yet, some folks want to bring more innocent souls into the world, with no plan for supporting them, nurturing them, and protecting them from crazed lunatics with guns, invading churches, movie theaters, nightclubs, schools, and grocery stores.

When did our society become so incredibly hateful and violent? More importantly, WHY are people like this? It’s just so sad. People just seem to hate each other so much now. I kind of wonder if it’s because of social media, to be honest. It’s like we can’t stand to be so exposed to people who are different than we are… and that somehow translates to feeling like murder is the answer.

Anyway… I think I’ll take care of some chores so that we can enjoy Thanksgiving, such as it is celebrated among Americans in Germany.

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Duggars, narcissists, politicians, politics, royals, YouTube

The “red mist”, and family ties that bind… and GAG!

Yesterday was an interesting day. I watched the election results roll in, gratified to see that a lot of people made their opinions regarding women’s rights quite clear. Yes, it’s true that Greg Abbott, Marjorie Taylor Greene, and Ron DeSantis won their races, but on the whole, the projected “red wave” turned out to be more like a red misting. Honestly, I don’t understand the lack of situational awareness and common sense some extreme right wingers have.

They thought they’d win because of the current high inflation and the cost of living situation. But why didn’t they consider that when people are having trouble paying their own bills, the LAST thing they’d want to be is pregnant?! Besides the fact that the anti-abortion laws are an obvious affront to privacy and bodily autonomy, having a baby is an expensive and potentially dangerous proposition for most women. Obviously, more people, than the Republicans realized, were mightily pissed off at the intrusion into their private healthcare and family planning decisions, but I’ll bet some of them realized that forcing people to have babies will make life even more expensive.

I wish Texas had gone blue, but I knew it wasn’t going to happen. Now, it’s time for some repercussions. I suspect some healthcare providers will leave Texas and go somewhere they can practice without draconian laws that punish them for doing their jobs. I suspect a lot of very bright women will leave the state for places where they can make private decisions about their healthcare, family planning, and their own bodily autonomy. I suspect some companies will decide not to operate in Texas, or move out of the state, so that their employees don’t have to deal with Abbott’s disastrous laws. It’s hard to attract good talent when the living conditions in a state are unhealthy or oppressive. The anti abortion laws in Texas are very oppressive, and they are going to kill women.

I do think that eventually, the abortion laws in Texas will have to be relaxed somewhat. But unfortunately, that won’t happen until the public is more outraged, and realizes exactly what they’ve wrought when they force people to have babies they aren’t ready for and/or don’t want. And it will take some deaths, too, when women who are denied timely care during miscarriages or other healthcare crises die or get much sicker… again, both propositions that will ultimately cost more on many levels, financially or otherwise. Sicker patients cost more to treat, and take up more spots in overburdened hospitals. They require more care, and take longer to go back to work. Dead mothers aren’t around to take care of their babies or other children. Eventually, I hope some people will understand these truths. I hope it happens before a lot of people actually find out firsthand. But God forbid someone actually exercise some common sense, right? They’ll get accused of spreading misinformation or cheering for “murdering babies”.

I’ll tell you what. I certainly don’t cheer for abortion, but I think early abortions are preferable to the horrors of babies growing up in violent, abusive, neglectful, alcoholic homes… And I think abortion is less traumatic and cruel than the reality of what too many of today’s children experience, sitting in classrooms or church services, terrified as gun toting lunatics storm through and randomly murder anyone who happens to be in their way or looks at them funny. At least abortion “victims” don’t know what’s coming, and don’t fear death or suffering the way already born victims do.

Anyway… I don’t mean to rant about this again. I’m just glad to see that I’m not the only one who sees why safe access to abortion is very important. I’m glad to know that the silent majority realizes that the pro-birth movement is only a good thing when there aren’t any societal ills to worry about. And Americans know that we have a lot of societal ills to fix before we start requiring all babies to be born. A few days ago, Mama Doctor Jones shared the below video on her YouTube channel… The elections are over, but I still think this is a good video. Hope you’ll watch…

These fools need to be voted out of public office.

So now, what’s up with today’s title? It was inspired as I watched Katie Joy’s video about Jinger Vuolo’s new book, Becoming Free Indeed: My Story of Disentangling Faith from Fear, about escaping Bill Gothard’s IBLP cult. Katie Joy says the Duggar parents are “terrified” that Jinger will expose their secrets and hinder their chances of getting back on TV. I think that’s entirely likely, but Jim Bob and Michelle had to know that one day, their children would be adults. I know they hoped the children would all stay under Jim Bob’s authority, and they did all they could to influence them to make those “choices”, uninformed as they might be. But come on… nineteen children… there’s bound to be some rebels in that group. And of course, there will be at least one “truth teller”, who isn’t going to stay silent about what went on, and still goes on, in that family.

I doubt Jinger’s book will be a super revealing “tell all”, but it’s probably going to be revealing enough to get her shunned by her family for awhile. As for whether or not I’ll be reading it… at this point, I don’t know. I don’t have a burning desire to read a book written by someone who escapes one cult, only to enter another. And while I know Jinger used a ghostwriter, I’m not altogether sure her book is one that’s going to excite me much. I did try to watch her video about it, but aside from liking her outfit, I didn’t find her delivery very compelling. I was reminded of when she was younger, and on the show. She was always the one who smiled, gave two thumbs up, and seemed “happy”, even if it was an act. In her latest video, she didn’t seem like the same person. Her eyes were kind of dead to me. Maybe she’s happier now, but I wasn’t convinced. But I’ve been wrong before. Maybe I’m wrong again. Anyway, if you want to see her video, you can easily find it on YouTube, at least at this writing.

I do think that Jinger should have a voice. She should be free to speak her truth. As a “freedom loving” Republican, her dad should embrace his children’s rights to express themselves. That is one of the top Constitutional rights all Americans are guaranteed. But I guess Republicans only care about the Constitution when it promotes their agendas.

The other book that’s about to come out is Prince Harry’s. His book, Spare, reportedly worries his family. The British Royal Family also has a lot of secrets they’d rather keep, and they worry that Harry’s insights will damage the family’s reputation. There’s been a lot of talk about what will happen when the book is published. Many people think King Charles III will strip Meghan and Harry of their titles, and ostracize them forever. If that happens, I will be sad– mainly about the ostracism, not so much the titles. I feel like Harry and Meghan should not use their titles, if they are going to be living in the United States and not working as royals. But… I also think that if this is the path they’ve chosen, they should have the right to express themselves. That doesn’t mean I don’t think they should have to deal with the consequences of their actions. It just means that they have the right to their own thoughts and expression, as everyone does. The British Royals aren’t wrong to be angry, but neither is Harry.

Will I read Harry’s book? I don’t know. I am a little curious about it… but I have a long list of books to be read, and I feel like some of Harry’s behavior has been pretty bad. I don’t like Meghan Markle. I think she’s a narcissist. For that reason, I feel a little sorry for Harry, because he’s caught in a trap. But I’ve also seen the toxic way narcissists affect their victims and make them unlikeable and unattractive. That’s part of the design. When narcissists get their victims to alienate other people, they prevent them from escaping their clutches. Harry used to be very well liked by people around the world. Now he’s pissed off a lot of people, which means that he has fewer places to go for help and comfort as he gets further stuck in the relationship… and as Meghan continues to devalue him until he’s no longer himself. I know some people don’t see this and will disagree with me. And again, I could be wrong. But I’ve seen this many times… and I’m married to a man who was once married to a narcissist. The signs and symptoms are pretty clear to me, even as I also acknowledge that what I see is only what’s in the media. Who knows what goes on behind closed doors?

Well… it’s going to be a busy day. I’ve got to go get the laundry, walk the dogs, practice guitar, vacuum, and take Arran in for his fifth chemo appointment. After today, he’s going to be more than halfway through his nine week protocol before the chemo appointments are less frequent. He continues to amaze us with his resilience. Yesterday, when I walked him, he demanded to go the long way. A month ago, he could barely manage a short walk, and didn’t want to eat the tempting canned food. Now, he scarfs down kibble, jumps up on the bed, and shows us love. So, I’m going to quit blogging now…

Have a good Thursday. If you’re American, I hope the elections where you are went somewhat the way you hoped they would…

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healthcare, law, politicians, politics, poor judgment

Lindsey Graham proposes a federal 15 week abortion ban… so much for states’ rights!

A few months ago, the Supreme Court overturned Roe v. Wade, much to the delight of conservatives. Finally, the abortion issue was going to be settled by the states! And those in red states, like Texas, Mississippi, Alabama, and Arkansas could finally look forward to not allowing abortions for ANY reason. It was one more tool for males to control females… or, those who are able to give birth.

But then, usually red state Kansas had an election, and voters there turned out en masse to protect the human right for the already born to have an abortion. Suddenly, Republicans realized they’d royally fucked up with their overreaching plan to eliminate the right for people to choose for themselves whether or not to be pregnant and give birth. Besides that, there were many awful stories from women who needed to access abortions for legitimate healthcare reasons and were being denied. Some women’s doctors were sending them home to get sicker when their patients were miscarrying, because the doctors didn’t want to be arrested or sued. And some physicians were even calling lawyers before offering standard treatments.

The most troubling and awful story of all, though, came just days after the overturn caused the state of Ohio to ban abortions. A ten year old CHILD was raped by her stepfather and forced to go to neighboring Indiana to get a very necessary abortion. At first, conservative pundits scoffed at the story, thinking it was fake news put out for political reasons. But, soon enough, it became clear that the story wasn’t fabricated. Sadly, the attorneys general in Ohio and Indiana were too narcissistic to admit that policies against allowing abortions were going to ruin or potentially end people’s lives. Instead of examining bad policies, they vowed to go after the female physician who provided healthcare to the ten year old who was pregnant through no fault of her own.

Savvy Republicans have finally also started to notice that people are pissed off enough about this egregious affront against the already born, that those who usually vote third party or Republican are voting for Democrats who have vowed to protect abortion rights. Crazy Trump supported candidates are winning their primaries, but losing general elections– see Sarah Palin’s recent disastrous run in Alaska. And so, Republicans who used to have anti-choice language on their Web sites are silently scrubbing them of any evidence that they are against allowing pregnant people the right to choose. They KNOW that abortion is one of those bipartisan issues, and they are finding out that their little stunt in overturning Roe v. Wade is backfiring spectacularly. And… they are now finding out, way too late, that allowing Trump to be the Republican candidate in 2016 has completely ruined their political party. It’s now been taken over by extremist MAGA asshats whose policies don’t work for most rank and file Americans.

South Carolina’s Senator Lindsey Graham, a man who is not married and never fathered any children, has decided to address this abortion fiasco by proposing a federal abortion ban. In the past, Graham had championed legislation that would outlaw abortions after 20 weeks. Now, he wants a FEDERAL abortion ban at 15 weeks. On the surface, this may seem okay to some people, since most abortions happen well before the proposed 15 week limit. At least it’s not a total ban, right? However, this bill does nothing to address the unreasonable and dangerous abortion bans that are currently law in many red states across the nation. What Graham’s legislation would do is make it federal law that abortions aren’t allowed after 15 weeks, except in certain cases, EVEN in states where abortion is currently allowed. So much for letting the states decide, eh? According to Slate magazine:

Unfortunately, many genetic and physical defects can only be detected after the 15th week of pregnancy. As The 19th reported in August, the earliest point when doctors can detect anomalies is between 15 and 22 weeks, when scans show fetal organ structures. Certain abnormalities detected at this stage, like Trisomy 18 and anencephaly, render fetuses “incompatible with life,” meaning they will die during birth or shortly thereafter. At most, if carried to term, these children will live just for hours or days in immense pain. And continuing the pregnancy often puts the patient at heightened risk of medical complications.

The lack of an exception for fetal anomalies in Graham’s bill is intentional. For years, the anti-abortion movement has sought to outlaw abortions due to fetal “disability.” Before the Supreme Court overturned Roe v. Wade, at least nine states had passed these bans. Three states also gagged doctors from even raising the possibility of termination with patients after diagnosing fetal abnormalities.

What really pisses me off about this plan is that, yet again, conservatives are pushing a narrative that late term abortions are rampant and done for convenience. That simply isn’t true. First of all, later term abortions are rare. Secondly, I won’t say there aren’t people out there who want a second or third trimester abortion because they’ve changed their minds about having a baby. There might be one or two people out there in the world who actually are that cruel and crazy. What I will say is that the vast majority of people who need later term abortions are folks who desperately wanted their babies, but found themselves in devastating medical situations that forced them to make a terrible and heartbreaking choice. Nothing about having a late term abortion is fun or convenient. Any legislation that addresses the so called “wanton sluts” who slaughter their almost viable babies in utero, just because they’re murderous, is just a bullshit conservative narrative.

No one who is in that situation– where either the mother or the developing fetus is desperately ill and facing death due to pregnancy– should have to explain to anyone else why they are choosing abortion. It is NO ONE else’s business. And no, we don’t need Lindsey Graham to ride in on a white horse and come up with an extremist federal abortion ban, especially since he is rumored to prefer the company of other men over women. I don’t understand why so many people are focused on abortion, when there are so many other problems in the world that affect people who have already been born. Why not focus much more attention on agendas like inflation, healthcare access, public safety, and international relations? You know– things that affect everybody?

Why don’t lawmakers listen to actual physicians about this issue? Mama Doctor Jones tweeted this just this morning:

Because people are pointing out medical emergencies that necessitate abortions– and YES, treatment for ectopic pregnancy is ABORTION– some “pro life” people are getting confused. Abortion is not a dirty word. Sometimes, it even happens naturally.

Another fair point by Mama Doctor Jones.

Not that I am upset that a lot of Republicans are facing uphill battles in their upcoming elections this year, but some of them need to realize that most people aren’t completely stupid. Taking away other people’s rights to choose, especially when planned or unplanned pregnancy is a condition you’ll never have to face, is just a bad idea. This summer, we’ve already seen the terrible unintended aftereffects of abortion bans. It’s only going to get worse. I think a lot of people who have given serious thought to this issue, for themselves, loved ones, or just people in general, have realized that this is an issue that politicians simply need to stay out of. Especially when they are Lindsey Graham. I don’t think he did his party any favors with this proposed federal legislation. It’s not going to pass, and it makes him look like an uninformed jackass. I’m glad to see that some people are finally seeing the light and voting accordingly. Sadly, some people are changing their minds, because they have been personally affected by the abortion bans. And some of those folks are people who were once vehemently “pro life”, but learned firsthand why being able to access abortion HEALTHCARE is essential for their own well-being.

I think it might be time for Mr. Graham to retire. Maybe his fellow Republicans will do what they can to convince Graham to find his next passion in life.

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