Tag Archives: misogynists

Alabama, healthcare, law, obits, politicians, politics

Why in the HELL are women staying in Alabama?

The featured photo is a public domain image of the Alabama state flag.

Don’t answer that. I know moving isn’t so easy for most people. It costs money to move. It requires the ability to travel, and the time off work to be able to make the move. It just galls me about the latest news about the abortion ban in Alabama, where Attorney General Steve Marshall has said that “he has the right to prosecute people” who aid and abet women who travel out of state for the purpose of getting abortion care.

Make no mistake about it. Abortion bans will hurt poor people the most, as they don’t have the money to go where abortion is legal. So when abortion is made illegal in almost all cases, that means these poor women are forced to stay pregnant, even if they don’t have the ability to provide for a baby. People with money will be able to travel without help from someone else, so they can go somewhere else for private, compassionate, respectful medical care. But poor women are TRAPPED.

I know a lot of people would say something along the lines of the women should have thought about the abortion bans before they had unprotected sex (what a romantic thought). However, it’s not really that simple… as a lot of women have sex because they’ve been pressured, cajoled, or even coerced by a male partner, many of whom won’t wear a condom. Many of the same women can’t afford birth control for themselves.

Or the women are victims of rape or incest, or they have medical problems or economic issues that make abortion the best decision for them. WHY IN THE HELL IS IT ANYONE ELSE’S BUSINESS if they travel to get an abortion, or who pays for the travel? Aren’t Republicans the ones who scream the most about medical freedom?

Alabama is not a good place to be a young, poor woman…

I don’t know about you, but I think it’s incredibly creepy and gross that so many conservative white men are so interested in whether or not a woman is pregnant. Especially given how these same disgusting MEN don’t want to do fuck all to hold the MEN who get them pregnant accountable! And they don’t want to pay for any programs that will make pregnancy healthier and more affordable, and parenthood easier for these women.

Listen… I don’t cheer for abortion. I was the poster child for NOT having premarital sex. I actually waited for marriage before my first time. But the vast majority of people don’t do that, and WON’T consider doing it. We don’t have enough resources for the people who have already been born! And we have far too many people in jail, already… although not enough of them are MAGA Rethuglicans.

I have been trying not to write too much about the insane situation going on with US politics over the past ten years or so… I find it very scary and kind of unreal. But these people in power have clearly forgotten that the United States is supposed to be the “land of the free”. These disgusting invasions of privacy into the personal healthcare decisions of pregnant women are not what America is supposed to be about.

I don’t have to worry about ever needing an abortion, but I know there are so many young women who will find themselves in need… and not just because they were “careless”, but because they could die without one. We’ve just got to get the politicians out of our wombs. Otherwise, things are going to get much worse for anyone who isn’t wealthy enough to travel in secret. These assholes don’t care about the women or the babies who will be born into poverty and potentially abusive situations. They only care about money and power, and they are flexing their muscles against people who are least able to fight back. It’s absolutely SICKENING.

I’m glad to see that Mr. Marshall is rightfully being sued by the non-profit organizations that want to help women who need abortions and deserve privacy. I hope he gets his ass handed to him. I would encourage women to get the hell out of Alabama and move somewhere safer, where they aren’t regarded as second class citizens.

In other news…

I just learned that Jimmy Buffett, the great master of laid back beach music celebrating the Caribbean and Florida Keys, has passed away. I was not as big of a fan of his music as a lot of my friends were/are, but I do have an appreciation for his persona. And I have many great memories of listening to his music, especially when I was in college.

Rest in peace, Jimmy.

Alas, I will never have the chance to witness Parrothead mania at one of his concerts. But I still enjoy his live albums, and the festive mood they always bring… and I’m gratified to know that even though he spent a lot of time in Alabama, Mississippi, and of course, Florida, Mr. Buffett was not a Republican.

May he rest in eternal peace…

I also heard that Mohammed Al Fayed, father of Dodi Fayed– Princess Diana’s late boyfriend– has also passed away. He was 94 years old.

I hope he is now at peace… He died the day before the 26th anniversary of Diana’s and Dodi’s deaths in 1997.

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condescending twatbags, slut shamers, stupid people

Repost: WTF did I just read?

Sorry for the second repost, but I referenced Roosh V. in the first repost and I figure I might as well repost this article about him from December 30, 2018. Tellingly enough, the post that inspired this rant is now gone. Oh well… I’m sure Roosh is just a big ol’ troll, and I don’t take him seriously at all. Nevertheless, I did mention him in the earlier repost, so here’s what I was referring to for history’s sake. Happy reading, anyway.

It’s a dark morning here in the central-western Germany, the last Sunday of 2018.  I woke up at about 6:00am, as usual, because my dog, Zane, was whining to go outside and have his breakfast.  Once I woke up, I couldn’t get back to sleep.  I started reading Facebook and noticed a link to a blog post that was shared in the Duggar Family News: Life is not pickles and hairspray group.

I don’t know how I missed this, but there’s an apparently popular blogger out there, name of Roosh V, who writes all kinds of inflammatory shit about how he thinks the world should operate.  I haven’t taken the time to read a lot of his posts.  I probably should read more of them before I comment too much, although the first post I read was a doozy.  Before I even started reading the post, which was published in September 2015, I was confronted by this…

Um…  “bad girls”?  Wow.  What kind of women is this man meeting?

I’m going to try to confine my comments about Roosh V’s blog strictly to what I’ve read so far.  For all I know, he’s not as sexist and backward as he seems.  I am myself the victim of people who make judgments of me based on just one or two controversial postings I’ve made.  I don’t like hypocrisy.  On the other hand, I’m not sure I want to read too much more of Roosh’s blog, mainly because what I have read is very offensive.

The post I read is entitled “Women Must Have Their Behavior And Decisions Controlled By Men”.  Roosh V observes that it’s only been within the last hundred years or so that women have been allowed to make decisions regarding their education, religion, life goals, and family plans.  He reminds his readers that until recently, women were expected to be under the care of a male guardian, or at least constrained by “tribe, family, church, law, or stiff cultural precepts.”  

Since women have been allowed more freedom, they have, in Roosh V’s opinion, made “poor choices” that have negatively affected society.  Roosh V writes that women are not as rational as men are, and they make decisions that are not in their best interests.  He admires German philosopher Arthur Shopenhauer, who wrote an essay called “On Women“.  According to Roosh V, Shopenhauer compares women to “overgrown children”, as evidenced by their consistently “impulsive” and “illogical” behavior.

As I was reading Roosh V’s post, I couldn’t help but notice how dispassionate his writing is.  The tone seems rather matter-of-fact, which sort of gives it a dangerous air of legitimacy.  Some of what he writes, on the surface, makes sense.  I even agree with a few of his more basic ideas, like encouraging people to travel more and interact with people who aren’t from the United States.  I think that’s actually a good idea.  But then I read more and see that he’s actually very xenophobic and sexist, although I haven’t yet seen too much evidence of racism.  I don’t really care to spend much time searching his writings to determine if he’s racist.

I think if Roosh V had written a more emotional screed, it would be easier to simply laugh at the nonsense conveyed in this post.  I don’t know what kind of women Roosh V has surrounded himself with, but clearly he hasn’t had much experience with diverse women.  Are there “impulsive”, “immature”, “unwise”, “overgrown children” women out there?  Yes, I think there definitely are.  But I have also seen many men who could be described in the same way.

Roosh V explains that left to their own devices, women make bad choices.  Have a look at his reasoning.

I could take the time to refute each of these claims.  Most of them don’t apply to me, personally.  I had a lot of freedom to choose when I was growing up.  I apparently made good choices, as evidenced by the privileged life I lead.  But even if I hadn’t made good choices, I might still be privileged.  Or, I could have made good choices and still been dealt “shitty cards”.  I think much of life is a crapshoot.

As I mentioned before, I didn’t read a lot of Roosh V’s blog, although he does apparently believe that heterosexual American men should seek foreign women (I had a link, but it’s dead now).  He thinks they’re “sweeter” and “more pleasing”, and likely to be thinner and more attractive.  I can tell Roosh V doesn’t get out much, nor does he really listen to women from other countries.  They may seem “sweeter” and more pleasing, but trust me, a lot of them have their ways of getting what they want.  They just go about it in a less straightforward and more manipulative manner.  I think Roosh V is foolish for apparently taking them at face value.  

I did read Roosh V’s “About Me” page, on which he writes that he shares Donald Trump’s birthday.  He also writes that his “important work” has been covered in many countries and he’s been targeted by “social justice” groups who want him silenced.  

For the record, I don’t agree with trying to silence people like Roosh V.  I clearly disagree with his opinions about women, but I support his right to have and express them without threats of violence.  While the content of his blog appears to be offensive to many people and counter to most modern thinking, they are basically his thoughts and opinions.  I think he has the right to communicate them, even if I think they’re mostly ludicrous.  On the other hand, it’s scary how many people secretly think the way Roosh V does.  Since Trump was elected, these people have become emboldened.  I can see why so many people are afraid to allow Roosh V’s more troubling ideas to go unchallenged.

But man… he does have some nerve, doesn’t he?  Look at this.

f you’re female, he expects you to send him a picture of yourself, so he can be sure you’re not a “troll”.  I wonder how he means that.  Is he referring to an Internet troublemaker or a very ugly person?  Before the Internet, trolls were defined as a derelict, homeless, or poor person, who would be considered dirty, unkempt, and probably unattractive.  The first time I heard of a “troll” was when I first heard the story “Three Billy Goats Gruff“.

I also notice that on his blog, Roosh V commented on the post I referenced in today’s post, assuring his readers that what he’s written is, in no way, satire.  He means every word.  And evidently, most of what matters to Roosh V is getting laid by a sexy woman who isn’t a “slut”.  How tragic.  What’s even sadder is that this guy is evidently making a living off of his ideas.  It could be that making money is all that’s behind his inflammatory postings.  The fact that it gets any positive regard is very troubling and sad.  I wonder if he’s like this simply because he’s a narcissist or because someone really hurt him.  I’m sure I’ll never know.  

Edited to add:  As of 2016, Roosh was still living in his mother’s basement.  That may be where some of his misogyny comes from.

Edited to add in 2023: He is half Iranian and half Armenian… so I don’t know. Maybe he’s just a troll. Maybe he really believes this shit he spews. Looks like he’s changed his contact form to one that is less contentious, and he claims he no longer gives pickup advice to men. Who knows? And really, who cares?

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Duggars, holidays, mental health, religion, sex, silliness

Repost: I’m grateful for orgasms…

I am reposting this article I wrote for my original blog back on November 22, 2013. It’s not that I don’t have another topic in mind for today. I just saw this in my Facebook memories and realized that yes, nine years later, I am STILL very grateful for orgasms. And I just wanted to spread the news.

As it’s November and the month of Thanksgiving, there have been a number of Facebook posts recently about gratitude.  Many people post something they are grateful for every day in November.  In the spirit of gratitude, I too have been posting things I am thankful for.  I try to keep my thanks upbeat and light-hearted, though.  I figure there are enough schmaltzy posts about being grateful for good health and happiness or a supportive family.  I like to give other things their due.

So I am grateful for odd things like clean underwear, modern plumbing, and Jagger’s swagger.  And yesterday, I was grateful for orgasms.  I posted that thought and was amazed by how many “likes” it got.  Some people thought it was funny.  Some thought it was shocking.  Some people, who know me, thought it was typical.  But yes, a lot of people apparently appreciate the ability to have an orgasm.  And you know, it’s something that many of us probably take for granted.  I’m aware that a lot of people thought my post on Facebook was funny, but when you think about it, the ability to have and enjoy an orgasm is really a much more serious subject than meets the eye.

Back in the late 1990s, I took Prozac for awhile.  It wasn’t the best drug for me and pretty much killed my ability to have an orgasm, not that I had a sex life at the time.  I just remember that even when I was in the mood for a little self abuse, it took forever.  It was very frustrating.  I remember thinking of Kurt Vonnegut’s short story, “Welcome To The Monkey House“, a story about overpopulation and indecency and how people of the future were ordered to take a drug that took all pleasure out of sex.  In the story, a druggist had taken his family to the zoo and was appalled when they saw monkeys masturbating.  He came up with “ethical birth control”,  a drug which didn’t actually render anyone sterile, but just made sex unappealing.  Because the world was overpopulated, everyone was required to take the druggist’s birth control pill. 

The story was also about how people were encouraged to visit “ethical suicide parlors”, where beautiful, tall, virginal women would help people voluntarily kill themselves as an effort to keep the world population of 17 billion people stable.  There was a group of rebels who refused to take the birth control and therefore were able to enjoy sex.  And indeed, they did enjoy it frequently.  One of the characters kidnaps a “suicide hostess” who is very much in favor of the laws.  The characters force the woman to allow the birth control to wear off… which, of course, gives her the ability to know what she had been missing.

I have always liked the story, but after taking Prozac, it became very profound to me.  It’s been years since I read it, but I do remember Vonnegut describing what the ethical birth control did to people and how it made them feel… kind of numb in the sexual regions.  And that’s how Prozac made me feel, too.

But at least I had the ability to stop taking the drug.  I eventually switched to Wellbutrin, which was a much better antidepressant for me.  My nether regions came back to life and my depression finally lifted.  I was able to make decisions.  Later that year, I met Bill online and the rest is history.  You might say Wellbutrin actually helped me finally get a sex life, though it took a few years.

I am very grateful not to have been raised in a belief system that thinks of sex as a dirty thing.  It’s bad enough that we have a number of religions that discourage masturbation and subject members to humiliating interviews about their “habits” and refer to masturbation as “self abuse”.  There are also belief systems that promote the idea that enjoying sex is a sin and that it should only be done for the purpose of procreation. 

There are a number of religions that forbid members from admiring others, even to the point of forcing young men to look away when a pretty woman walks by or worse, forcing young women to wear shapeless garments that obscure their figures and veils that cover their hair and face.  This is all done in the name of avoiding lust or, heaven forbid, immorality caused by an orgasm.  An early episode of the fundamentalist Christian Duggar family’s reality show featured someone shouting “Nike!” when a pretty but “inappropriately dressed” young woman walked by.  It was a code to get the boys to lower their eyes, lest they be “defrauded”– that is, driven to lust by the tempting appearance of a beautiful woman.  Can’t have those young men having boners, can we?  Not until their wedding nights to women who are hand-picked by daddy… and may or may not be all that attractive or interesting. (ETA in 2022– oh, how innocent we were about the Duggar family in 2013!)

There are also a lot of women who, unfortunately, can’t have orgasms because they have been subjected to female circumcision.  Female circumcision is a horrible misogynistic custom practiced in certain countries around the world.  It’s considered a rite of passage in some places, perhaps even celebrated to some extent before a poor girl between the ages of birth and puberty is forcibly held down as her genitals are brutally mutilated by other women or even the local male barber, who may be a local health practitioner.  It involves removing part or all of the clitoris and sewing up the labia, which makes the eventual enjoyment of sex very difficult.  This procedure can be done with or without anesthesia.  It can cause significant health problems and gynecological difficulties.  It can also cause death.

Women who have had their clitorises amputated can’t experience orgasms.  They may or may not know what they are missing, which seems like a small problem in the grand scheme of things.  Just the idea of trying to recover from such a brutal operation, as routine for them as having wisdom teeth extracted is for many Americans, is hard to fathom.  It really is food for thought if you happen to be lucky enough to be a woman living in a place where female genital mutilation is not common.

So yes, during this season of Thanksgiving, I am very grateful for orgasms… the ability to have them at will, and for the sweet man who still inspires me to have them.  Orgasms are one of life’s most wonderful gifts.  May you enjoy your orgasms as much as I do mine…

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healthcare, music, narcissists, politicians

Some people have to experience things personally to understand…

Well, today was the day we were long awaiting, but has already turned out to be disappointing. No, I don’t just mean because it’s Election Day in the United States. That is probably going to be quite a shitshow, because it seems that the United States is firmly polarized as to which direction people want our government to go. It really is distressing to see how many people are so divided over concepts like a woman’s right to make private healthcare decisions and the economy. It’s also sad to see how many truly ignorant, unkind, and unempathic people there are in the United States. We have lots of “nice” people there… but it’s really nothing but a show, isn’t it? MAGA idiots have no empathy for anyone, nor are they long on intelligence or insight.

I’m really starting to dislike them.

Over the past few days, I’ve read several heartbreaking stories from women in Texas who needed to terminate their pregnancies, not because they were careless, but because of catastrophic things going wrong. In the two most recent cases I read about, one four months pregnant woman was advised to terminate because her developing baby boy’s kidneys had failed to develop, and upon further testing it was discovered that he had other fatal conditions that were slowly killing him inside her womb. In that case, the mother ended up flying to New York for an abortion, because doctors in Texas were not allowed to help her in that way without risking legal ramifications.

In the other case, a woman was diagnosed with an incompetent cervix and would inevitably lose the baby girl she had long anticipated. Prior to 2021, her doctors in Texas could have helped her before she became seriously ill with the sepsis that almost killed her, and forced her to spend several days in the ICU. But thanks to Greg Abbott’s barbaric anti abortion law, she had to wait until she was “sick enough” for help. She almost died, and she may never be able to conceive again, due to scarring left by the infections. She has to undergo surgeries and other procedures to repair the damage wrought by willfully incompetent medical care in Texas. How is this happening in 2022? I hope she sues the ever loving fuck out of the hospital and the state for medical malpractice. I hope she sues Greg Abbott, too.

Try to point out these cases to the MAGA morons, though, and you’ll read and hear nothing but bullshit rhetoric about how abortion is “murder”. They pull fake statistics out of their asses, and talk about babies being “dismembered”. They say that 95% of pregnancies don’t involve these kind of catastrophic situations. And, amazingly, these folks– most of whom are MEN– say that the women must be lying, because the law allows medical professionals to help women who need abortions to save their lives. While that may technically be true, I have read multiple stories of pregnant women experiencing complications who were told to wait until they got very sick, even though the physicians know damned well what will happen to them. It’s obvious malpractice. I think the only way this will change is if women die, and lawsuits happen… particularly if the women are young, thin, beautiful, socially prominent, and middle or upper class. Only then can we hope to vote out misogynistic bastards like Greg Abbott and his ilk. Abbott and the rest of the MAGA crowd don’t care about women.

Last night, I tried to explain this to one man who was writing about women “murdering” their babies, and he obviously couldn’t deal with the edification. My guess is that he’s a very narrow minded person with a tiny dick who can’t stand a woman confronting his views. So, after I set him straight again, I told him I hoped none of the female loved ones in his life ever need life saving medical care in Texas when they’re pregnant. Then I wished him a “good one”.

Naturally, because he’s a misogynistic MAGA male, he responded to me, even though I made it clear I was done with the conversation. I didn’t read his response, because he’s made it abundantly obvious what kind of a horrible, ignorant person he is. I know I sound angry in this paragraph, but my initial comment to him was not written in anger. I was sincerely trying to point out the fact that all women of childbearing age are at risk in Texas, because of these laws. It’s not just women who got pregnant and don’t want to be. It’s also women who desperately want their babies, but will suffer health consequences if they don’t terminate. At the time I made my comment, I hoped that he at least cares about the women of childbearing age in his family. But, I guess he doesn’t. Maybe he just needs this issue to affect his loved ones personally, before the significance of completely banning abortion will be clear to him. Maybe one of his female loved ones needs a bonafide brush with death, or severe illness, before the truth about how dangerous these bans are finally knocks him in the head. And I hope he’s the one who has to pay the medical bills, too.

I am still a Texas voter. Bill and I sent our ballots weeks ago. We both voted straight blue. I know we aren’t the only ones, but I fear that Texas is full of stupid MAGA creeps who love Trump more than they do the women in their lives. And they aren’t bright enough to understand that the economy isn’t completely controlled by the president, nor is inflation an issue that only affects Americans. They also want to conflate abortion with COVID vaccines. The sheer stupidity of it really makes me sick. There was a time not so long ago that the two main parties in the United States weren’t THAT different. At least the candidates were, on the surface, basically decent and respectable. But Donald Trump has ruined the Republican Party. I only hope that his influence causes them to eat each other alive.

Anyway… that’s about all I want to say about the election. I truly am mostly worried about women’s rights to make private healthcare decisions and their ability to access timely abortions whenever they want or need them. I think it’s very important on many levels. I wouldn’t want to bring a baby into the world as it is today. Fortunately, it’s not an issue for me anymore. I won’t be having any babies. I always wanted kids, but now I thank God my family line will die with me. And the more this dystopian version of the United States, and the world, persists, the more I hope I can peace out of here sooner, rather than later. In fact, that’s one of the main reasons I avoid seeing doctors myself.

Now, onto the reason why today is already disappointing. We were supposed to see James Taylor perform tonight. Bill and I have second row seats. Unfortunately, yesterday afternoon, last night’s and tonight’s shows were postponed, because someone in the band got COVID. This concert was originally supposed to happen in February 2022, but that show was also postponed due to COVID– that time, because the illness as a whole was too prevalent. This time, it’s because someone in the band is sick. Bill just got over COVID himself, so I can see why this happened. It still sucks. I’m not as upset about it as some people are, though. I think a lot of people are just totally over COVID and everything that goes with it, even though people are still getting sick. If we still lived in Stuttgart, we would have seen James. That show, which happened on Saturday night, did go on as planned.

It’s probably just as well that the show won’t go on tonight, because we didn’t get much sleep last night. Arran kept getting up, wanting food, needing to pee, and drinking water. He got up three times early this morning. I know Bill is going to be really tired this evening, so it’s probably better that we’ll be home this evening. Hopefully, James won’t reschedule the concert for when we’re in France next week. I doubt that will happen, though, since his shows next week are in Scandinavia. I can’t see him bringing his band and all that goes with it down here for shows in Zurich and Frankfurt for a couple of days next week. The funny thing is, now Arran is curled up in bed, sleeping. Why he can suddenly sleep after we’re up is a mystery. We do love him, and this is a temporary thing… Soon enough, we’ll be missing him. Bill will be especially heartbroken.

Anyway… I hold out some hope that more people will vote for decency than money. Because if they vote for money, they’ll find out that once those people are in power, their money will soon no longer be their money. MAGA leaders don’t want to see ordinary people with any money. They like to keep as many regular people down as possible. Not allowing women access to abortions or birth control is one way of keeping them down. Frankly, I think it would serve these male MAGA assholes right if women just stopped having sex with them. They should just be forced to exclusively masturbate from now on.

Sorry… that’s crass, but I’m tired and feeling a bit pessimistic. Hopefully, things will improve as the day wears on… but I ain’t gonna hold my breath.

This shit always pisses me off. Take the “someone else’s body” out of the mother and see how long it lasts without Mom’s help…
Truth! Republicans only care about babies who are like them.

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condescending twatbags, language, modern problems

“Using that word to describe the woman in this article says a lot about you… and none of it is good.”

Last night, I read a post on God’s Facebook page that is very timely, as kids all across America head back to school. The article was derived from a lively Reddit thread, where poster BlueCarrot002 asked if she was the “asshole” for getting personalized stationery for her daughter.

I must admit, as a childless child of the 70s and 80s, this trend of parents being asked to buy extra supplies for classrooms is a strange idea to me. In my day, everybody brought their own supplies to school. And parents would put their child’s name on their stuff, so it wouldn’t get “borrowed” or redistributed. I’m sure it sucked back then for kids whose parents didn’t have a lot of money. But, if you think about it, we all knew whose parents had money, and whose didn’t. Hell, I used to be jealous of my classmates whose parents bought them Trapper Keepers for every subject, while I had cheap plastic binders with shitty plastic rings. Or they had those cool erasable pens, while I had some cheesy ballpoint pen my dad got from some business. My mom wasn’t one to pander to my desires for fancy school supplies, and we would usually shop for that stuff at AAFES. And AAFES, at least in the 80s, was not a high end store.

This was THE status symbol, when I was in the 4th grade.

Unfortunately, life isn’t fair. Some kids are more athletic than others are. Some are more attractive or musically talented or funny. Some kids are academic geniuses. And some have parents who have money, and can buy them pencils with dinosaurs on them, personalized stationery, or lefty scissors. Or they have parents who are willing to deal with the child’s sensory issues by getting them notebooks with plastic spirals instead of metal ones. Some people prefer to write with certain types of pens and pencils. If that helps them succeed in doing their work, what’s the big deal? Part of growing up is learning to accept that life isn’t fair, and doing the best you can with what you have.

I don’t remember this ad, but we liked our Paper Mates, too.

I can understand the reasons teachers might have for asking parents to contribute supplies. I also understand why they would want the parents to get things that are generic. However, based on God’s article, it doesn’t sound like the teacher specified that the supplies should be the cheapest available. She was likely fine with genuine Crayola crayons over the generic ones that are found at the Dollar Tree. It sounds like the mom in this instance simply wanted to provide the best available supplies for her child. I don’t blame her for that.

What really got my hackles up, though, was the fact that the teacher sent home what the Redditor describes as a “very passive aggressive note” inviting her to come in for a “talking to” with the teacher. Now, it could be that the teacher’s note wasn’t actually passive aggressive. Maybe it was a friendly note. But since the actual note isn’t provided to Redditors, I will just assume the mom’s assessment of the note’s tone is correct.

I don’t blame the mom for refusing the teacher’s request. I would do the same thing.

Generally speaking, I am very pro-teacher. I think they are underpaid and disrespected. I know they have a tough job, and they literally put their lives on the line working in education these days. I still think it would grind my gears to have a teacher dictate to me that I must buy extra supplies for the classroom, to cover the kids who don’t have what they need, and then tell me that I can’t provide the school supplies that work best for my own child. And I would not take kindly to a “request” to come in for a discussion about my kid’s perfectly good school supplies, especially after I contributed the “generic” extra supplies that were requested. In fact, I would probably end up complaining to a higher power. My response to the teacher’s “request” (which sounds more like a demand) would likely be a resounding “NO.” However… It does seem strange to me that the mom would buy “personalized stationery”. In my day, we all just used college ruled loose leaf paper.

No more chalkboards!

Most of the people on God’s page were all about the mom providing personalized supplies for her child. I see on Reddit, the commenters are offering good reasons why the policy of redistributing supplies is potentially traumatic, as well as unfair. One person wrote about how they were going through tough financial straits and sent their child with used supplies from their older siblings. The teacher sent the used supplies back, explaining that they weren’t appropriate. Why not? The used supplies work as well as brand new ones do. And then the poor kid was humiliated in front of their peers.

Others wrote about how they were asked to buy tons of supplies every year that never got used, or were items that should last for years, like scissors, protractors, rulers and compasses. Specifically, one poster wrote “those things will last for years, if you take care of them.” Exactly… and part of the experience of being in school should be teaching children to take care of their things, and maintain possession of their own stuff. So yeah, if I were the mom in this scenario, I would be raising some hell.

A pretty good representation of what it was like for us in the 80s.

I read some of the Facebook comments… and then I had to stop. I must be turning into an old lady now, because one comment literally made me cringe. A man from Minnesota (I checked to make sure he wasn’t a Brit or living in Britain), wrote something along the lines of, “That woman is just a cunt. She just wants to show off how much money she has. Fuck her!”

Wow. I’m not sure what prompted this guy– name of Ryan– to leave such a misogynistic and completely inappropriate response to that article. However, against my better judgment, I felt compelled to respond to him with what I think is a gentle rebuke.

I wrote, “Ryan, using that word to describe the woman in this article says a lot about you… and none of it is good.”

I fully expected Ryan to come back and call ME a cunt. Usually, that type of person has no qualms about spewing their nastiness on anyone in the strike zone. I did pause before I commented, because I don’t want to be called a cunt. Especially after I’ve had a beer or two, as was the case last night. But then I realized that I can always block Ryan if he lobs verbal abuse at me. Lately, I’ve been blocking people I haven’t even engaged with, simply because I can easily tell that they aren’t people with whom I wish to interact.

After I commented to Ryan, I had to sit and contemplate for a few minutes. I must be getting old. I have often stated, and I do actually believe, that all words are useful sometimes. I do think there are even some times when the word “cunt” is appropriate. However, in the United States, that’s generally a term that is saved for the end of an argument. Sure, if you’re a Brit, you might use it to describe a silly fool, or something. But that article was written for and mostly read by Americans, and to Americans, the word “cunt” is among the worst of the worst insults, especially to women. We would all be up in arms if someone casually dropped the n bomb on social media. So why is it okay for Ryan to call some mother he doesn’t know a “cunt”, simply because he has unresolved issues regarding women? I mean, I know I’m assuming, but why else would he go there so early?

Anyway… I was surprised at myself, because after I read Ryan’s comment, it turned me off of the comment page. I had to click off of it. I shared God’s post on my own page, and a few friends who are teachers chimed in. Most seemed to think the teacher’s policy of redistributing school supplies is ridiculous. I mean, I guess some teachers pass out and collect the supplies at the beginning and end of each session. I still think there’s value in teaching children that they have to keep up with their own stuff, and that labeling things, especially when you’re working in a group, is a smart policy.

Count me among those who also think that if a stranger’s behavior seems wrong or unfair, it’s better not to call them a name that connotes so much hatred for a group of people. The fact that Ryan felt perfectly fine in referring to a concerned mother as a “cunt” who is “showing off” her money, tells me that he has some serious issues with women, and probably people with money, too. It’s not a good look, as the orange turd would say.

Reading this story makes me glad I don’t have children.

Bonus video… this one is pretty funny!

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