communication, musings

Reposts, random messages, and reasons why…

Actually… some messages are useful and some are entertaining.

Regular readers may have noticed that lately, I’ve been reposting a lot of old book reviews and articles from my original Blogspot version of The Overeducated Housewife, which I discontinued in 2019. Those who also follow my travel adventures might remember that last year, I spent several months updating old posts from Blogger. The travel blog wasn’t so huge that I couldn’t migrate it to WordPress. Unfortunately, doing so led to massive formatting problems. I spent a lot of time updating and reformatting posts that were years old. That process is mostly finished now, save for the odd hiccup. I did have to edit a couple of old posts yesterday, which I only noticed because someone hit them on Statcounter.

I was not able to migrate the Blogspot version of this blog to WordPress. I think it’s because the file was simply too large. I started my blog in March 2010, so that was a lot of material to move. The system just flat refused to do it for me. I’m actually kind of glad, too. Some of it was stuff that doesn’t need to be reposted… non-sensical drivel I posted while bored or uninspired, or posts about time sensitive issues that aren’t relevant now. There were a few other posts that I didn’t repost because I wrote them when I was angry and they are potentially hurtful to others.

After spending months reformatting the travel blog, I decided I didn’t want to have to do that with the original OH blog. That thing had over 3000 posts over a span of almost nine years! By contrast, the travel blog had maybe a third as many. Reformatting is very tedious and thankless work. I think it’s better to just repost the stuff that I think might be interesting.

Some people might wonder why I would repost anything, especially book reviews that are very old. It’s mainly because I’ve discovered that people get nostalgic and look for information about things that may no longer be covered online. I’ve found myself listed in bibliographies, often by Internet handles. I get a kick out of that. But really, the book reviews of titles that are now out of print can be valuable to some users. In some cases, what I (or others) have written in book reviews may be all the information that can be found of books that have gone out of print. Book reviews are pretty evergreen and, as you’ll see below, some of the better articles, especially about true crime, are legitimately useful to readers. My angry rants about very personal or insignificant issues, or people no longer in my life, are much less so. đŸ˜‰

I also like to preserve my own thoughts and memories, especially when there’s a news story involved. For example, on my travel blog, I reposted an article I wrote several years ago about a trip to the Eastern Shore that I took with my parents in the early 80s. On the way home, we stopped in Chincoteague, and I ended up visiting a water slide that was owned by a guy who, years later, made the news for being a sex offender who castrated himself while he was in jail. That true crime case is now many years old, but I guarantee there are people out there who remember it and want to read about it. I could have put it on this blog, but when it comes down to it, that story is ultimately a travel tale, and the travel blog needs some love. I do mostly try to keep the mood light on that blog, but not every travel story is delightful. I like to keep things real, if I can.

In the wake of all of the reposts I’ve been doing, I’ve been getting some strange comments and messages from people. Sometimes, I get communications through the contact form. I mostly appreciate the ones that aren’t spam, since most people who contact me are respectful. Sometimes the spam messages are hilarious, like the one I got today. Check this out…

Um… I wasn’t aware that I had any “drug addict criminals” to send anywhere…

Sometimes, I’m left scratching my head as to why someone would contact me about something. The other day, I got a message from a very decorated academic. I looked him up on LinkedIn, per his suggestion. He invited me to contact him if I ever wanted to know about Title IX and suicide on college campuses. I was puzzled, since I don’t think I’ve ever written about that subject. I consulted Statcounter to see which article the guy had accessed me through, looking for a clue as to why he’d written to me. The article he hit had nothing to do with the topic he was proposing. It was something I’d written about an advice column about divorce. But maybe the guy thought I could cover that subject or would be interested in it? I’m not sure, because he didn’t explain.

I probably would enjoy talking to this man. Maybe I should try interviewing willing subjects. I mostly write about stuff in my head, but two heads are better than one, right?

I got another recent communication from someone who wants to know more about a true crime story I wrote about years ago and had reposted. I didn’t actually know that much about the crime itself; I just happen to know someone who knows the perpetrator because they grew up in the same town. In fact, my friend had once brought him to our college and I actually met the guy. But at the time that I met him, I didn’t know he had killed someone, and I am not from the small town where the murder happened. I just know someone who knows him. Somehow, the commenter thought I knew more than I do, so she was hoping to glean insight from me. I ended up directing her to my friend, who is more in the know. I thought our exchange was over until this morning, when I got this message…

I have never done a podcast. Maybe someday I will do one, but at this writing, that is not in my bag of tricks.

I might be good at podcasts. Once upon a time, I did radio, and I was relatively good at it. I’ve been told I have a good voice for the airwaves, although I don’t like listening to it myself. Maybe someday I’ll try it, just for fun. We’ll see if my ego can take it if no one wants to listen to me.

One thing I would like to mention to those who do send me a message– bear in mind that unless you explicitly tell me, I won’t necessarily know what you’re referring to when you make a comment on the contact form. Those messages aren’t linked to any specific posts, so unless you are clear about which one you’re referencing, I am left to guess. Sometimes, it’s obvious, but other times it’s not. The message from the academic was a head scratcher. The one below was easier to figure out, but still not 100 percent obvious.

This guy was referencing a repost about strange crimes that happened in the small town where I went to college. But I had to clarify it, because it wasn’t necessarily plain.

The WordPress version of my blog is about 2.5 years old now. I’m glad I changed formats from Google Blogspot. I’d been wanting to do it for awhile, since the Blogspot format feels kind of limited and dated. I hesitated for a long time because I was enjoying a pretty good presence on Blogspot. When I discovered that someone was deliberately stirring up trouble for me offline, I decided that it was finally time to move the blog somewhere else and use a platform that would allow me more control over my content. WordPress allows me to password protect certain posts, so that invited readers can access them, but the general public can’t. On Blogspot, I could either make posts open to everyone or make them open to just me. Or, I could make the blog open only to invited readers, which I didn’t really want to do. Not every interested reader wants to be a member of an invite only blog.

I know Blogspot has been revamped a lot since 2019, and maybe what I’ve observed about its shortcomings is no longer true. I do keep my Dungeon of the Past blog on Blogspot, but I seldom update that blog and may discontinue it once my AdSense finally hits $100. I’m getting close.

It was painful to move this blog. Moving from Blogspot meant losing the somewhat robust readership I had, as well as earnings from Google AdSense and Amazon. The money wasn’t a necessity, but it was a nice perk. I would like to be able to earn some money on my own, you know. It’s a point of pride… even if all I earn in a year is enough to buy me a six pack of beer. I’m lucky enough to have a husband who supports me in all ways. He certainly doesn’t have to do that, but it’s nice for me that he does, given our lifestyle.

Since I moved the blog, it’s steadily been getting more readers. I have found that, by and large, I like the people reading now more than I did a lot of the readers of my original blog. People who are reading now tend to actually care more about the content. I don’t get nearly as many rude or abusive comments on this blog. Of course, I also moderate comments here, while for the longest time, I didn’t do that on Blogspot. I’ve found that moderating comments cuts down on hostile drivebys. I require people to identify themselves, so they must really want to say something to me if they comment. When I didn’t moderate, people would be more willing to comment, but many of the comments were mean spirited. I have feelings because I’m a person, too. Also, comment moderation cuts down on spam, although as you can see from the first screenshot, I still get spammers via the contact form! I still would like to know where Wilton gets the idea that I have drug addict criminals to send to his rehab. How strange!

Anyway… I do have a few current events in my mind that I might write some fresh content about today. Or I might repost more stuff from the past. I hope those of you who are annoyed with the reposts will continue to have some patience. People are interested in some of that old content, and sometimes I get inspired to make fresh content based on the comments I get on the throwback stuff. This post, for example, is one of those that wouldn’t have been written without reposts. Some might find it a boring read… but I know I have at least one regular reader who was amused by Wilton’s offer to host my drug addict criminals. You see? People are interested in all kinds of stuff. Luckily, so am I.

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politicians, politics

Oh no… Is Bernie Sanders a pervert, too?

Last night, I happened to notice a Snopes article shared by one of my Trump loving relatives. The headline blared– Bernie Sanders’ 1972 Essay on Rape. My relative posted it without comment. He’s one of my less vocal family members, at least on social media. However, I’ve known him my whole life and I know what he thinks of extreme liberalism, so I pretty much understand what his intent was when he (or his wife, since they share an account) posted this link.

I have mentioned more than once that I didn’t always care about politics. In fact, it was probably true in 2015 that I wasn’t really paying attention to the political arena. Back then, it was inconceivable to me that we’d have Donald Trump as our dear leader. But apparently, back in 2015, when Bernie Sanders was running for the Democratic nomination, an old essay of his surfaced on the liberal Web site, Mother Jones. It was written for a long defunct alternative newspaper called Vermont Freeman in February 1972, when I was still in utero. Back then, Bernie was still a young man and it looks like maybe he was trying to make his mark on the world by writing a somewhat bizarre essay on gender roles and sexual fantasies.

The Mother Jones article is a good read, and I recommend that anyone who is legitimately concerned about Bernie’s 48 year old “rape essay” read it and gain some perspective on this. Yes, it’s weird that Bernie opens his article with these paragraphs:

A man goes home and masturbates his typical fantasy. A woman on her knees, a woman tied up, a woman abused.

A woman enjoys intercourse with her man — as she fantasizes being raped by 3 men simultaneously.

The man and woman get dressed up on Sunday — and go to Church, or maybe to their “revolutionary” political meeting.

https://www.vox.com/2015/5/28/8682503/bernie-sanders-rape-fantasy

But– the fact is, some women (and men) do have bizarre sex fantasies. Some women even fantasize about being raped, even if the reality of rape is absolutely horrible and nothing they would ever actually want to happen to them. All you have to do to realize the truth about this is take a look around the darker corners of the Internet, or check out the sales of books like 50 Shades of Grey or 9 1/2 Weeks.

In fact, a revolutionary book about women’s sexual fantasies was published in 1973, just one year after Sanders dared to suggest that some women fantasize about rape. My Secret Garden, by Nancy Friday, was so successful that it spawned several sequels, including Forbidden Flowers, Men in Love (about men’s sexual fantasies), and Women on Top. I have actually read all of those books, having discovered My Secret Garden at a Waldenbooks when I was 17 years old. The books were comprised of sexual fantasies submitted to Nancy Friday by anonymous men and women. Friday compiled the essays, then wrote introductions and explanations between each one. And judging by how crazily well the books sold for many years, a lot of people identified or, at least were very interested.

When I first saw the headline about Bernie Sanders’ “bizarre” sex essay that suggested that a woman fantasized about being raped by three men, the first thing I thought of was My Secret Garden. That book came out at a time when sex was becoming a lot less taboo. It was before the conservative 1980s– before AIDS became a universal terror that reminded people that freely having sex with many partners can lead to devastating consequences. I clearly remember reading several sexual fantasies submitted by women who were fascinated by rape. I’m sure that not a single one of those women would actually want to be raped. It was just a concept in their heads that intrigued them.

I also figure that Bernie Sanders was simply trying to do what most writers try to do. He was trying to get people to read his work about gender roles. His method was to surprise them with something shocking and potentially distasteful, and he succeeded.

It’s true that most people’s first reactions to Bernie Sanders’ essay would likely be horror and disapproval. Most people have closed minds about topics regarding sexual assault and rape, just as they do about taboo topics like pedophilia. There is a difference between a pedophile– who is attracted to children, but may or may not have ever acted on the attraction– and a child sexual molester– who may or may not be attracted to children, but acts on abusing them. It’s not often that I encounter someone who can have a discussion about a topic like pedophilia with an open mind and rationality. Many people think that admitted pedophiles, whether or not they’ve ever acted on their deviant attraction to children, should simply be taken out and shot, rather than given compassion and real help for what must be a horrifying problem.

And yet, strangely enough, a lot of the people who publicly express horror and disgust toward sexual abuse of women and children don’t mind voting for a man who has openly admitted to sexually abusing women and has actually been accused of raping at least two– one of whom was just 13 years old at the time. I guess they choose to overlook inconvenient facts– particularly when it means more money in their paychecks. It’s much easier to be outraged about topics like rape and sexual assault when one’s livelihood isn’t at stake.

I will admit that I don’t know a lot about Bernie Sanders, other than his age– 78– and that he’s well known for radical, idealistic ideas that upset a lot of conservatives. Bernie Sanders just won the New Hampshire primaries ahead of Pete Buttigieg. Scores of people are “feelin’ the Bern”, while a lot of other people think Trump is “making America great again”. I guess some conservative folks are legitimately worried that Bernie could actually win the White House and things will be “worse” for them than they were during the Obama era. I think a lot of white people– particularly those from rural areas who have felt disenfranchised and shamed for being who and what they are– are afraid that a potential President Bernie Sanders will land them at the bottom of the heap. And so, I can understand why my relative saw fit to share this old news about Bernie’s foray into alternative journalism.

I’m not sure I approve of Bernie Sanders’ attempts to be edgy in his writing for a long defunct alternative newspaper in notoriously liberal Vermont. However, I would much rather have a president who has written clumsy, provocative essays about taboo subjects like sexual assault and rape fantasies, than have a president who has actually carried them out. And, as I pointed out above, many Americans have already shown that they don’t even care about the sexual abuse of women, when it either doesn’t personally affect them or someone they love, or it involves someone famous and charismatic.

Look at how long it’s taken for Bill Cosby to finally be punished for what he did to dozens of women over the years. Look how long Jeffrey Epstein got away with raping, abusing, and sexually trafficking young girls before he was finally dealt with by law enforcement. Look at the fact that our current president was actually caught bragging about “grabbing women by the pussy” before he was even elected! People still voted for Trump, even though he was undeniably guilty of making those misogynistic statements in what he called “locker room talk”. I think it’s disingenuous for Republicans to be upset about Bernie Sanders’ 48 year old comments about rape and sexual fantasies for a long defunct alternative newspaper. Moreover, I’m sure that most politicians are dirty to some extent. Being involved in some kind of sex scandal seems to be required for any of them to move beyond the most basic political offices, but maybe I’m just being cynical.

So… count me among those who say “big whoop” about Bernie Sanders’ so-called “shocking” rape essay, published before I was even born. In the grand scheme of things, I don’t think it’s a big deal. As far as I know so far, Mr. Sanders hasn’t actually abused anyone sexually himself, although I did read that some women claimed that they experienced sexual harassment during his 2016 campaign. However, I haven’t read that Mr. Sanders was, himself, the perpetrator of that harassment. Donald Trump, on the other hand, has been accused of some extremely vile sexual conduct which I have, more than once, written about in this blog. I will take Bernie Sanders’ declaration that some women fantasize about rape (which is a verified fact) any day over Donald Trump boasting about his ability to harass women at will because he’s a “star”.

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