Happy Tuesday morning to all. Yesterday, Bill, who has been feeling under the weather, finally took a COVID test to see if he was infected with the virus. Some people who were TDY with him in Bavaria had gotten positive results. Sure enough, he’s got the bug, so he’s working from home today. I told him days ago that he shouldn’t go in to work, because he’d be spreading his germs. Did he listen to me? Naw. Oh well… guess my MPH degree didn’t help this time. 😉 Fortunately, he’s not very sick. He just has the pesky head cold version of COVID. So far, I’m not feeling sick, either, but then I had COVID a few months ago. Maybe my immune system is working. I’m glad we didn’t go out and do anything over the weekend.
I keep watching the news about the upcoming elections. There are some truly vile candidates running for office, which is worrisome for those of us who long for leaders who are respectable. However, even though I don’t like the MAGA candidates at all, I still firmly believe that people should be allowed to vote for whomever they wish. That’s part of being in a free society. I don’t like it when people try to tell me who I should vote for, so I try not to do it to anyone else. Yes, I express disdain people like Donald Trump, and I don’t understand the appeal of having him, or people who “lead” like him, back in office. But I still believe that people should be allowed to vote freely, even if I disagree with their choices. I feel that way because I want the same privilege for myself.
I was dismayed to hear about people in Arizona lurking around drop boxes, watching people dropping off ballots, taking pictures of them and their license plates, and in some cases, actually confronting them. This morning, Bill told me about an video on CNN about a woman in Arizona who was hanging out near a drop box and confronted two armed men. The woman in the story appeared to be on the liberal side of the divide, but there have also been some from the more conservative side, some of whom are bringing their guns with them. I said, “Eventually, someone is going to get hurt or killed for meddling in other people’s attempts to cast ballots.”
As I’ve mentioned more than once, things have changed a lot in my lifetime. I’ve been around for 50 years now, and I’ve never seen or heard of this kind of foolishness surrounding elections prior to the Trump era. People have lost faith in the voting system, and some of them are taking it upon themselves to interfere with the process. There’s actually a significant population that believes our elections are fraudulent, simply because Trump didn’t win in 2020. They can’t fathom why he wasn’t chosen over Joe Biden. I just don’t get it, though. To me, it’s very EASY to see why Trump didn’t win. I may not think Joe Biden is the most exciting or dynamic person to lead the country, but it’s least he’s a basically decent person.
Donald Trump has a history of corruption that runs for miles, and he’s a proponent for violence and disorder. He’s flat out expressed admiration for autocrats; he’s had many failed businesses and marriages; and he refuses to play fairly, even with our allies. Moreover, he doesn’t care about other people; he only cares about money and power, and he says and does embarrassing things that make the United States look like a Banana Republic. To me, this is very obvious. In my opinion, Trump doesn’t have any traits that good leaders possess. All he has is superficial charisma, which he uses to wind up people who are motivated by the same things that motivate him. But they don’t seem to understand that he doesn’t give a shit about them, and neither do his acolytes. Once those people get in power, they will proceed in screwing over everyone.
Still… I realize that these are just my opinions. I understand that other people feel differently. They think Trump is awesome, and they will vote for candidates who support him, like Kari Lake, who has said that she will only accept the results of her run for governor if she is declared the winner. I say, it is certainly their right, as Americans, to vote as they see fit without interference. All I want is the same opportunity. Fortunately, I voted absentee, which is still okay if you live abroad. I doubt the candidates I voted for will win, but at least I tried. And no one brandished a gun in my presence when I voted, because I did it in the privacy of my own home, in a country where far fewer people own weapons.
I still like to hope that there are still reasonable people in the United States. Even if they don’t like liberal policies, I would hope they would make a choice for sanity. I, for one, am not a big fan of extreme liberalism. Politically, I would describe myself as deep purple. But I am NOT ever voting for MAGA Republican extremists. They are dangerous, and they are turning my homeland into a place I don’t recognize. I know I’m not alone in feeling this way. I long for the day when it seemed like the government was run by adults with a sense of decorum. Maybe those days are gone forever. Once again, I find myself glad that I never had kids.
The drop boxes are a good thing for people who can’t make it to polling locations. These are folks who don’t have access to transportation, sick, elderly, or disabled people, or maybe those who have to work when the polls are open. They are Americans, too, and they deserve the right to vote, just as much as someone more privileged does. For all of the complaining conservatives do about people getting “free stuff” and grifting taxpayer dollars, they don’t seem to understand that their “dear leader” is the biggest grifter of all. And people who are stuck in poverty are not inherently criminals or “stupid”. It’s not a crime to be poor, and someone who has the misfortune of being impoverished doesn’t necessarily “deserve” that fate. Drop boxes help make elections more fair, because they allow more people access. But conservatives are afraid that people who make less money– some of whom are non-whites– won’t vote for their candidates. They’re afraid that straight, white people will be less powerful, and less relevant. So they bring their guns to the drop boxes and meddle in other people’s voting.
When I read about these people with their guns, voluntarily taking it upon themselves to “oversee” the drop boxes, all I can think is that eventually, someone is going to get hurt. Someone is going to end up in prison because they have been misguided into believing in conspiracy theories. Some families are going to be forever changed, in a multitude of negative ways, because of that misguided belief.
I like to hope that some of the people who believe that the elections are rigged are, overall, decent folks. But then someone gets hurt or killed or even just psychologically traumatized, and it ends up in the news. It’s just ludicrous.
Anyway, our votes are on their way to Texas. I wish us all luck.
Sigh… It’s not even 8:00am, and I’m already feeling a bit irritable, mainly because my nose was all clogged last night and I evidently slept with my mouth open. I was parched when I got up, and had a bit of a headache. It’s just another day of COVID… which hasn’t made me very sick, but has definitely been a real pain in the ass to deal with. Adding to my frustrations are the horrors of the world today.
Codify reproductive rights and that will take care of contraceptives. Those men in black robes need to be shut down. I shouldn’t have to fight for this again at 76 !
Shockingly, she received laugh reactions and a shitty response from another woman, who stupidly wrote this:
So I’m sure you need birth control or an abortion at your age.
Seriously? This clueless bitch doesn’t think that older women might want to engage in the fight to bodily autonomy, just because they aren’t going to be affected by pregnancy or necessarily need birth control anymore? At least one person commented to that effect. But then I saw a comment from a man named Scott:
or you could use your time productively and promote not becoming pregnant in the first place. But that is never a thought is it?
Wow… does Scott have any fucking idea of what he’s writing about? Does he know how many of his fellow men pressure women to have sex with them? Does he realize that a lot of men can’t be bothered to use condoms? Even fewer of them will consider having a vasectomy. I have no issues with men who don’t want vasectomies, by the way. If you’ve read this blog, you know why I feel that way. But I do think that if you’re going to have the nerve to mansplain to women about personal responsibility and pregnancy, you really should walk the walk. Somehow, I doubt Scott does.
A woman addressed Scott with this comment:
do you have any clue how many people choose to have babies and who end up aborting a fetus because of miscarriage, the inviability if the fetus or other pregnancy complications?
Apparently not because anyone who did wouldn’t be thinking about every abortion being a problem. When pregnant women die because of a medical emergency that was preventable I guess that means you’re not as prolife as you think you are.
Scott came back with this ignorant comment:
the life of the mother should always trump the life of the baby.
This is not what most abortions are about though, and you know it.
First off… Scott doesn’t know what other people know, and what they don’t know. Secondly, while the life of the mother *should* always “trump” the life of the developing fetus, the sad fact is, that DOESN’T always happen. Especially right now!
Last night, I read a sad and disturbing news story on NPR about a Texas woman named Elizabeth Weller, who very much wanted her baby girl to be born. But Weller’s waters broke at 18 weeks gestation, which meant the pregnancy wasn’t going to be viable. It was May 2022, a month before Roe v Wade was overturned. Texas still has that shitty law from last year, which pretty much bans all abortions and has had a chilling effect on the treatments physicians are willing to give to pregnant people. This lady went to see her doctor, who told her that she could either terminate the pregnancy, or go into the hospital and try to carry the pregnancy until the 24th week of gestation, when developing fetuses start becoming viable.
Weller and her husband decided that it would be best to terminate the pregnancy, even though they really wanted the baby. They knew that even in the unlikely event that she was able to maintain the pregnancy until the 24th week, the baby would likely be born with serious birth defects. But when Weller’s OB-GYN tried to arrange the procedure, she ran into significant obstacles. Doctors would not help Elizabeth Weller as long as her fetus still had a heartbeat. They told her she’d have to wait for the fetus to die in utero. In other words, she’d have to get really sick and put her health on the line before they would take action. So much for the life of the mother, eh?
This is not the first time I’ve read a story like this. I’ve seen stories like Elizabeth Weller’s from several different states. I’ve also seen many smug, self-righteous, arrogant comments from people like Scott, stating that if a woman’s life was in danger, the doctors would help her. What Scott doesn’t seem to realize is that right now, doctors are afraid of being arrested or sued for giving women abortions, even when an abortion is clearly medically indicated. Elizabeth Weller was forced to go home and wait until she had a high fever and was passing discharge from her vagina that smelled bad enough to make her retch. This is not good medical care, people. It’s torture. It’s cruel and nonsensical to treat women this way. This should not be happening. Moreover, nobody should have to justify or explain why they want or need an abortion! Especially to sanctimonious dickheads like Scott!
Scott continued his mansplaining, though, with this comment:
men have no say in getting you pregnant, only you do.
Seriously, Scott? Where the fuck have you been?! Tell that to the disgusting male RAPIST who impregnated a ten year old CHILD!!!
I wish it was only men who were making these ignorant comments, but there are plenty of old biddies weighing in, too. A woman named Kaye keeps commenting on Klobuchar’s post that abortions are not contraceptives. Duh, Kaye. This post wasn’t about abortion, it’s about making sure that women have access to contraceptives. There are politicians and judges who are considering taking away those rights. That’s what Amy Klobuchar is posting about.
I don’t think people like Scott and Kaye have really considered what taking away reproductive rights will do to our society. I can think of quite a few consequences just off the top of my head. Here’s a list:
Health care costs will go up, because women will have to wait until they get very sick to get abortion care. That will mean more needlessly complicated and costlier interventions.
Fewer people will want to be OB-GYNs, because they will be too constrained by uninvolved parties in delivering care, and they will have to pay even higher malpractice premiums than they already do. OB-GYNs have among the highest malpractice insurance premiums already.
There will be more children with special needs, and more children in the foster care system.
There will be more child abuse, because people will be having babies they aren’t prepared to parent, and they won’t necessarily want to give them up for adoption.
There will be more poverty, because children are expensive to raise.
There will be less privacy, because some folks will feel the need to intervene in other people’s personal business.
More men will be accused of rape, and that will mean more of them will go to prison.
More women will be accused of “murder”, and that will mean more of them will go to prison.
Some women will stop having sex with men voluntarily, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing. In fact, I hope no woman lets Scott have sex with her, given his caveman attitude.
There could be an uptick in domestic violence and divorce, as women won’t want to risk getting pregnant. Men will be sexually frustrated, which might cause them to drink more alcohol and engage in violent behaviors. There could be more drunk driving, and we all know what that leads to.
There may be an uptick in mental health disorders like anxiety and depression. Some people may even turn to suicide, if a situation seems desperate enough.
Women will be less healthy. Some will die.
I’m sure if I felt like it, I could sit here and think of even more consequences to this ridiculous idea that women shouldn’t be allowed to control their own healthcare decisions. Politicians are already talking about trying to restrict potentially pregnant people from leaving their states to access abortion care. It’s absolutely SICKENING that they’re talking about this. I grew up hearing about how lucky I was to be an American, because we’re so “free”. Tell me, what is so “free” about passing laws that punish pregnant people for making decisions about their own bodies? Why in the world should someone like Greg Abbott, current governor of Texas, have any say whatsoever in decisions a woman makes regarding her own reproduction? The United States is turning into a police state, especially for WOMEN!!!!
I, for one, am glad that the 76 year old woman on Amy Klobuchar’s Facebook page is willing to speak up for other women. She’s old enough to remember when women had far fewer rights than we have now. She remembers what it was like to be a woman of childbearing age who had no right to terminate a pregnancy. In those days, people had more privacy, though, because there was no Internet. Nowadays, the Internet can trip up a person, as creepy social media sites collect information about users. Oppressive jerks like Scott want to put women behind bars, simply because they think they should have a say in what another person does with their own body!
I’ve said it before. I’m so tired of thinking and writing about abortion. It’s not something I will have to face. However, this issue is a slippery slope. No, it doesn’t directly affect me anymore, but who’s to say that the next invasion of privacy and intrusion into healthcare practices won’t affect me? Has Scott considered that this issue is just the tip of the iceberg? He’s very naive if he doesn’t realize that the powers-that-be will eventually be coming after freedoms that are important to him. Many of those folks truly believe that they have different rights and privileges than the rest of us have. I am reminded of Martin Niemöller, who wrote a very famous poem about the dangers of looking the other way:
As I close today’s rant, I want to share this July 25th video by Rachel Maddow, which shows how it’s later than we think. We’ve got idiots like Marjorie Taylor Greene talking about turning the United States into a “Christian Nation”. Listen to Rachel’s talk about former 50s era politician Gerald L.K. Smith, and his “America First” party. Listen to what Mr. Smith said back in the day, and compare it to what Marjorie Taylor Greene is saying now. It’s scary as hell. Mr. Smith was a racist, Nazi sympathizer, and anti Semite, and he wanted to be president. Smith died in 1976, but there are lots of other people just like him who are in politics now. They want to be in charge. Abortion rights and access to contraception are just the beginning of what they want to take away from rank and file citizens.
So, you see, this issue isn’t just about abortion. And we should all fight against ignorant people like Scott and Kaye, and do our best to defeat people who want to take away our freedoms and rights to privacy. I have seen some very scary ignorance regarding pregnancy and abortion from people like Scott and Kaye. There will be real consequences if we don’t reverse this trend now.
Now to move on to guitar practice, before I have a stroke.
Those were Bill’s words to me at about 5:00am, as he kissed me goodbye today. He had to drive to Stuttgart again for an overnight business trip. We did a COVID-19 test yesterday, since I’m sick again. It was negative. Bill is feeling alright so far. I don’t know what this bug is. For all I know, my body is catching all the stuff it avoided for the past few years. My sore throat is mostly better now, but I have a stuffy, slightly runny nose, and there’s coughing and occasional sneezing. It’s basically a case of the sniffles.
It’s really hot here in Germany, which makes me glad we have two portable air conditioners. On the other hand, energy prices are going up, so that may mean I’ll regret making myself comfortable when we get the bill. I didn’t walk the dogs yesterday, because it was so hot, and because I’m sick and don’t want to share it with anyone. Of course, Bill is probably going to share it with his friends in Stuttgart, anyway.
It’s crazy that before June, I couldn’t remember the last time I was sick with a cold. Now, I’ve had two bouts within a month. They’re probably both COVID, but the test isn’t showing that… and I’m not going to keep testing until I get a positive result, unless I’m not getting better. People tell me to keep testing, but why would I want to do that? It’s not like it’s fun, or anything. I may try to do a short walk with the boys today, since they love their walks and the fresh air might do me some good. I don’t usually run into people when we take walks, anyway. And it will give me a chance to see the brand new toilet facility that was erected in our village. 😉
On the bright side, if this is COVID, I’m definitely not super ill. It’s really more of a nuisance than anything else. I don’t feel well, but I’m not deathly ill or even moderately sick. I’m just kind of miserable, and it’s made worse by the heat, and the fact that Bill had to go away again. But he was kind enough to leave me coffee in the jug and a couple of fresh German doughnuts.
Last night, as I was reading more about the state of things in the United States, I commented to Bill that I’m starting to hate men. Then I added, I don’t hate all men… just the ones that have no compassion and espouse misogyny. I’ve been so angry about this Supreme Court decision regarding abortion, and I know it’s only the beginning. I started listing things we should do… like avoiding spending money in states that don’t value women’s healthcare. That means no trips to places like godforsaken Texas, even though I am technically a resident. I hope there’s a mass exodus of smart people from those places. I hope the women there REFUSE to do anything sexual with men, unless they’ve either had a vasectomy, or they are in a loving relationship in which a pregnancy would be welcome. I hope women start suing the hell out of doctors who refuse to give them appropriate medical care when they need an abortion for genuine medical reasons. I hope the men who knock up women start getting sued for child and pregnancy support before the babies are born. I want this decision to be PAINFUL… especially for the men who think it’s a good thing that women are now worth less than their unborn fetuses are. And I hope the Supreme Court Justices who made this decision never see another peaceful day in their miserable lifetimes.
But then I looked at Bill, who is such a kind and loving man, and was actually hurt by a woman who took advantage of being female. I realize that I don’t really hate men. I’m just angry, and I feel helpless. What I really want is fairness and privacy for everybody. And I want things to be less surreal and… horrible. I think another season of The Handmaid’s Tale is about to come out. I’m not sure if I can bear to watch it now, because it’s too close to reality.
It probably doesn’t help matters that I’ve been reading a book about Roe v. Wade. The book is really long, and it’s been slow going trying to get through it, because I fall asleep after a few pages, not because it’s a dull book, but because I literally can’t keep my eyes open. I don’t typically sleep seven or eight hours straight, and I often need a nap in the afternoons, especially if I try to read. It may be time to use Audible, at least until I can get a new contact lens prescription. Last night, I couldn’t even read the instructions on the insert that came with the COVID test. Getting older sucks… except for the fact that I know I’ll never be forced to give birth.
I always recommend Rachel Maddow’s show, because she’s sharp and savvy, and she has a quick wit. But if you are as angry about the overturning of Roe v. Wade as I am, I encourage you to watch from 13:45 and see what’s already happening to women, not even ONE MONTH after the ruling was overturned. And then, if you’re still curious about who will be harmed by these new laws springing up, have a look at this unlocked article from The New York Times about what happens to children who are forced to stay pregnant. It’s definitely not a pretty sight. Ten year olds are not physiologically prepared to have babies. Their bodies simply aren’t ready. These are people who still need booster seats in the car, for God’s sake!
So yeah… I am sick, hot, tired, and ANGRY. And fed up… I feel a little like Mommie Dearest… although, I’m obviously not as happy as she is in this scene. I just wish I was “raging mad” with the flu, so I wouldn’t even have to listen.
But since Bill isn’t here, and I’m in no shape to do musical stuff, maybe I’ll get started on that satire that’s been rattling around in my head. Especially since now, there’s no “minder” around to make sure I don’t offend anyone.
Sorry about this super long post. I have a lot on my unusually clear mind this week. 😉
The week is grinding on, and I’ve been doing my best to stay occupied as I eagerly wait for Friday, when Bill returns from Stuttgart. As much as I complain when Bill is out of town, I have to admit it’s not all bad. For one thing, it gives me a chance to catch up on shows like My Feet Are Killing Me. I binged a few more episodes of that show last night. Thankfully, none of them gave me nightmares, although some of the issues people present with on that show are heartbreaking. I imagine the pain I’m in when I wear shoes that don’t fit well, knowing that when I take them off, the pain will go away. The people on that show have to deal with excruciating, unrelenting pain. It must be so rewarding for the podiatrists when they see their patients walk with less agony and/or better looking feet.
In some ways, I find My Feet Are Killing Me a less annoying show than Dr. Pimple Popper, because there are several doctors. “Dr. Brad” gets on my nerves, though, because he comes off a bit like a frat boy to me. And, maybe I’m a cranky old broad, but I don’t like it when doctors introduce themselves with their surnames, but call their patients by their first names. I’d blame it on living in Germany for almost 8 years, but I didn’t like it in the States, either. However, I would be preferred to be called by my first name than some cutesy pet name like “hon” or “sweetie”. If I’m going to be paying you out the ass for healthcare, you can call me Ms. or Mrs. And get offa my lawn, while you’re at it.
I’ve also been teetotaling while Bill is away. I usually try not to drink alcohol when he’s not home. There are a few reasons why I do this. The main one is to give my poor old body a break. Another reason is that in case of an emergency, I don’t want to be under the influence of booze. If I had to take one of the dogs to the vet, or had some kind of medical or other emergent issue, I wouldn’t want to be the slightest bit bombed. And finally, I like to remind myself that there are other ways to spend my time. It’s also comforting to know that I can still choose not to drink, given my family’s alcoholic history and my own enjoyment of the “sauce”. 😉
Watching videos of people in the United States getting busted for DWI is one way to remind myself of how things can quickly spin out of control after a drink or two. Germany is stricter about drinking and driving than the US is. The blood alcohol limit is .05 here, and if you get busted, they can and will force you to give a blood sample. There’s also a 500 euro fine for a first offense, and other penalties I won’t get into with this post. I almost never drive, but if I am alone, I might need to go somewhere, and I’d rather not go by bus. At least here, there are a lot of options for those who need a ride. We don’t have train station in our town, but we do have plenty of buses and taxis. However, anywhere I’d go would probably require me to drive, because I’d most likely be taking my dogs.
I spent a good portion of yesterday watching footage of people being arrested. Most of the videos were entertaining enough, but there was one guy who really gave me pause. This guy was a real character– memorable in EVERY way. After watching him interact with the cops incidents in both Vermilion and Lorain, Ohio, all I could do is feel sorry for this man’s family… especially his wife and kids. In fact, his stepson even commented on one of the videos, confirming to everyone that stepdad is a real jackass most of the time, with a few exceptions. Behold, Dorsey Fields…
The video below was actually from an earlier incident in a neighboring town. It happened maybe a month before the above video footage was taken. In the below video, Mr. Fields was busted for impersonating a police officer. As he was being arrested, he protested the officers scratching his 2004 model car. That beard, too… It’s too much.
As I was watching Dorsey Fields in action, I couldn’t help but think he was naturally entertaining. Under different circumstances, maybe he could have been a character actor. He has a good voice for acting or speaking– it’s clear, distinctive, and doesn’t have a strong accent. He has personality, although it’s not a very pleasant personality, based on these videos. He’s also often hilarious, whether or not he means to be. Throughout his many rants in these videos, I can see glimmers of a gentler person… maybe when he’s totally sober and medicated, he’s even a very nice or otherwise redeemed person. According to his stepchild’s comment, Fields is bipolar. This was posted about 14 months ago or so.
Izzy (2 months ago):This is my step dad, I currently live with him and he acts like this everyday. I just recently turned 18 but ever since I was 11 we always fought. I have no remorse for him. After everything he’s done to degrade me, make me feel like shit and emotionally manipulate our family this is deserved and i’m glad people are seeing how much of an asshole he is.He also knows about the video but refuses to watch it, I read the comments to him but he still doesn’t think he’s a total asshole. Also he doesn’t own any businesses, my mom owns two restaurants that he didn’t contribute to. He isn’t a CEO of anything either and the car isn’t his. He is bipolar but I don’t think that excuses him being an asshole since he’s pretty much always been like this. I hope this video and these comments help him realize he needs serious help.
EDIT: Thank you for all the positive comments, support, and advice. I wasn’t expecting a lot of sympathy, but regardless I deeply appreciate it!! I genuinely hope his mental health, attitude, and behavior improves. Honestly sometimes he’s a cool dude and we have a lot of memories together, but most of the times he’s a total POS which sucks. Hopefully one day we’ll see his positive side more.
Poor Izzy. Wonder what his or her mom sees in Dorsey. She sounds like a very ambitious, hard working person, and she deserves better treatment than what this guy obviously delivers. I have to admit, though, these videos were the highlight of a hot afternoon. Which brings me to my next topic, and the subject of this post. I’ll bet most guys like Dorsey Fields aren’t very nice to their women. Strong women scare weak men. It’s obvious to me, especially in the comment sections of news articles about abortion. I’ll bet ol’ Dorsey is a Republican, too, and he comes from a state that strongly wants to deny women the right to terminate their pregnancies. Honestly, I think the existence of guys like Dorsey Field are one of the main reasons the ability to get abortions should absolutely remain legal.
Last night, I was reading an article in the Washington Post about how Democrats are working to come up with ways to get around Republican oppression regarding women’s health and access to abortions. On Rachel Maddow’s show, I heard about pro choice groups creating bulletproof vans that provide abortion services and can be driven to borders near anti-choice states. I think it’s sad that such a personal procedure might have to be done clandestinely in a motor vehicle, just so people can maintain control over their own reproduction. On the other hand, bravo to those who are not taking this shit lying down and FIGHTING BACK against zealots who want to force women to be pregnant when they don’t want to be.
Oh, but the comments from some of the men are so very telling. On the article I read last night, there was a really nasty character named Max who was leaving disgusting, insulting, and downright racist comments toward an atheist woman from Tunisia who argued for choice. He wasn’t the only one making vile comments to her; there were at least two other guys who were being overbearing, rude, and MEAN to this brave woman who dared to express an opinion. I got so disgusted by Max’s comments that I blocked him, even though I didn’t engage him. I also reported him for racist hate speech. I know I’m not the only one.
I wish Max’s vile commentary against pro-choice women was an anomaly in the wake of the reversal of Roe v Wade, but it isn’t. Every day, I read more insulting comments from MEN who claim to be pro-life and lament about “murdering” babies. But they have no thought whatsoever for the horrible, dehumanizing, demeaning, and cruel comments they deliver to living, breathing, former fetuses. Most of these men also expect women to find them attractive enough to fuck. George Carlin once famously asked his fans if they’d ever noticed that people against abortion are people they wouldn’t want to fuck in the first place. I’m here to tell you, I find most pro-life men utterly repulsive, not because they claim to be against abortion, but because they are usually just mean spirited, insufferable, uncaring dickheads.
Take, for instance, this op-ed that appears in The New York Times today. The piece is called “Please Laugh About My Abortion With Me.” Lots of men are commenting. Most probably didn’t bother to read the article, written by Alison Leiby, who does stand up comedy and has had an abortion. She has a comedy show called “Oh God, a Show About Abortion.”, which she performed the evening of June 24, 2022, which was the day Roe v Wade was overturned and millions of American women lost significant rights to their privacy and bodily autonomy. One wouldn’t think this would be a subject we should laugh about, regardless of how one stands on the abortion issue. Leiby has actually been performing this routine for a few years, having found that writing jokes helped her process the experience of having an abortion.
I’m a big fan of turning trauma into something creative. I do it all the time on my blog. Not everyone enjoys what I do. That’s to be expected, of course. But it is one way of taking back my power, and maintaining my mental health. For example, a few years ago, when our former landlady was driving me batshit crazy, I was writing short stories about her. I figured that was better than doing something violent. Her former tenant, who has since committed suicide, sent me a very shaming private message, mocking me for calling what I do “creative”. That’s the thing about creativity, though. It’s very subjective, and it doesn’t have to be “good” or “popular” to be healing. You don’t have to like someone else’s creative pursuits. Other people might like it and be helped, or even healed by it. The beauty of creative pursuits is that reactions often vary, and as long as the work means something to the creator, it’s worth doing on some level. I thought Alison Leiby’s article on joking about abortion was outstanding. Sadly, a lot of people will comment on it without reading, simply because their minds are firmly closed.
Maybe if the former tenant had been more open to good old fashioned venting in a blog, or turning her trauma into some other form of creativity, she might still be alive today. And it’s not that I don’t empathize with her, either. I’ve felt suicidal many times in my life. I think if I didn’t have a creative spirit fighting to get out, I might have one day done the ultimate anti-life thing, like she did. In fact, when I was suffering from debilitating depression and anxiety in the late 1990s, I studied voice. It helped me stay afloat when I saw no other reason to stay on this shitty planet, where an anti-choice total stranger once told me I should be forced to give birth, as they also called me a fat, murderous, “CUNT”. No lie– someone actually said that to me– and no, I have never been pregnant or needed an abortion. He said it because I’m a woman with an opinion he didn’t like. Why would I want to birth a baby in a world in which my child could possibly come into contact with a hateful, disgusting, rage-filled, disrespectful moron like him? He can’t even restrain himself from calling a perfect stranger a “CUNT”, and he thinks innocent babies should be brought into a world where he is on the loose, ready to hurt them with his vile misogynistic views?
Why is it that the most disgusting, reprehensible, sexist, racist, power hungry men are usually the ones who insist on making women stay pregnant, as they shame the women for getting pregnant and insist that it was a 50/50 decision. You can’t tell these guys that women often give in to men who want sex… or they are FORCED to have sex. And the ones who want to get birth control or even have sterilization procedures, often have to deal with doctors who don’t want to fulfill their requests.
So there I was last night, reading the comments about women’s rights to abortion care in the news. I was bewildered by men who were passionately railing against women who “murder” their babies, yet had no trouble totally trying to destroy and dehumanize the women who disagreed with them. These were already born people– folks who were once fetuses themselves, whom these guys claim they care so much about today. All I can do is imagine these angry, horrible, hateful men cursing out a beautiful baby girl, calling her a slut or a murderer or any other vile name… who someday might be knocked up by one of their grandsons, and might fervently wish to end the pregnancy for whatever reason, that is absolutely none of their business. As long as it’s HER body, it must be HER choice. That’s the way it WILL ultimately be, no matter how much yelling, threatening and cursing these guys do. It would so serve them right if many more women of childbearing age simply stopped having sex with any man who doesn’t embrace her absolute divine right to control her own body.
Anyway… I really liked Alison Leiby’s op-ed. I think people should read it, so this link will take you to her unlocked article. Like George Carlin before her, Alison Leiby has figured out that we really can joke about anything. Sometimes telling jokes can be very healing. Sometimes reading and writing profane rants is healing. Sometimes singing– even if it’s terrible singing– is healing. Dancing can be a wonderful way to relieve stress and make something constructive out of something damaging, as is practicing any form of art, no matter what it is. Yes, you can laugh about abortion if you want to, and it won’t send you straight to Hell. Just open your mind and use it for thinking, instead of judging.
There’s no need to be scared, weak and misogynistic men of the USA. This isn’t your fight; it belongs to women, because women are strong enough to fight for their rights. And in spite of what so many scared, hateful, horrible anti-choice men think, strong women WILL prevail in this fight. I hope some of the women who are married to belligerent drunks who drive while intoxicated will also have the courage to leave… and maybe embrace masturbation or celibacy, while they’re at it.
Every day, I read another distressing headline about the craziness going on in the United States. At the top of today’s crazy headlines is the new law that went into effect in Texas yesterday. In their neverending quest to deny women the right to determine whether or not they want to be pregnant, lawmakers in Texas crafted a law that seems to have come straight out of East Germany in the 1970s.
At this writing, it is now illegal for a woman to get an abortion in Texas if she is more than six weeks pregnant. Most people don’t even know if they are pregnant at that point. This law basically outlaws abortion, since most abortions are done after six weeks gestation. What makes this new law even more sinister, though, is that it encourages neighbors to inform on each other. The Supreme Court, stacked with Trump era justices, has declined to intervene on this barbaric new law. The vote was 5 to 4, with Chief Justice John Roberts siding with the liberal justices.
The law is unique, in that it puts enforcement on the population and is difficult to challenge in court. According to The New York Times:
Usually, a lawsuit seeking to block a law because it is unconstitutional would name state officials as defendants. However, the Texas law, which makes no exceptions for pregnancies resulting from incest or rape, bars state officials from enforcing it and instead deputizes private individuals to sue anyone who performs the procedure or “aids and abets” it.
So basically, if your right wing nutjob neighbor Bubba gets wind that you’re pregnant and you get an abortion, Bubba can sue your doctor, the facility that performed the abortion, and anyone else who “aided and abetted” your abortion. I guess that means if you took an Uber or your mom gave you money for an airline ticket, your driver and your mom could be sued for “aiding and abetting” your abortion. Maybe Bubba could sue the airline that transported you to a distant city for the procedure… even if it was in another state.
Interestingly enough, Bubba can’t sue you for having a procedure. He can only sue anyone involved in your getting the procedure. However, Bubba can sue, even if the procedure isn’t done in Texas, as long as the person having the abortion is a Texas resident. So, Texas ladies, you’d better keep your personal life private.
Again from the article:
The patient may not be sued, but doctors, staff members at clinics, counselors, people who help pay for the procedure, and even an Uber driver taking a patient to an abortion clinic are all potential defendants. Plaintiffs, who do not need to live in Texas, have any connection to the abortion or show any injury from it, are entitled to $10,000 and their legal fees recovered if they win. Prevailing defendants are not entitled to legal fees.
Naturally, a lot of people are pissed off about this new legislation. I am pretty pissed off about it myself, although it’s not going to affect me personally. As I have mentioned many times in this blog, I am 100% pro-choice. It’s not because I cheer for people having abortions. I personally find abortion sickening. It’s because it’s simply no one else’s business what kind of medical care someone else gets.
There are times when an abortion is indicated for medical reasons. I don’t think anyone– especially someone not personally involved in the pregnancy– has ANY right to insert themselves in someone else’s private medical business. Moreover, given that we don’t do fuck all to help people who might choose abortion, nor do we do much once those babies are born, I think this law is especially wrong-headed and cruel.
I am still a Texas voter, even though I live in Germany. This shit just makes me more determined to vote straight blue from now on… not that it will do any good. Makes me wonder, though, if people will get desperate enough to get violent about having abortions.
Texas is a famously gun friendly state, especially now that Texans can openly carry weapons without a permit or any training. What if Bubba decides to sue someone because of their choice to have an abortion and gets shot in the head for meddling in someone’s private medical affairs? I’d like to think that’s an unlikely scenario, but given how absolutely crazy things are in the United States right now, I could actually see it happening. People are unhinged, and this kind of interference can lead to desperate and tragic consequences.
I worry about the developing fetuses that may suffer needless pain because there’s something congenitally wrong with them that would make being born cruel. I am concerned about twelve year old girls who have barely reached puberty being forced to give birth. I am concerned about 49 year old women who have chronic diseases having to continue pregnancies that put them at risk. I worry about the teenager who got pregnant by her brother or her uncle or her father… or her abusive boyfriend. I could go on, but I think you get the point.
Edited to add, Rachel Maddow points out why this new law is so chilling and disgusting on so many levels!
I know some people think abortion is always wrong. To those people, I say “don’t have an abortion” if you think they’re morally wrong. You have no right to dictate another person’s medical care, especially if you’re not going to be around to help deal with the consequences.
What especially pisses me off, though, is that I haven’t heard of any legislation that makes medical care less expensive and more accessible for all of these women. I haven’t heard of any legislation that makes the men who got the women pregnant in these situations more accountable for their parts in the unintended pregnancies. Where are the laws that support the pregnant people who are going to be forced to give birth? Haven’t seen any, yet… but I have seen a lot of people slut shaming and putting it entirely on women to be sure they are doing everything to prevent unintended pregnancies.
Once again, the Trump era has delivered another disaster to the United States in the form of forced birthing and neighbors reporting on each other, as they might if they were in East Germany and under the watchful eyes of the Stasi. It’s creepy and sickening, and it makes me glad I don’t have a daughter who might be affected by this intrusion. But the people who are going to suffer the most are the poor, who won’t be able to simply move out of Texas and take care of this private business on their own. Hmmm… one can only hope those souls, who will be born into poverty or other difficult situations, will grow up and vote for Democrats.
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