condescending twatbags, slut shamers, stupid people

Repost: WTF did I just read?

Sorry for the second repost, but I referenced Roosh V. in the first repost and I figure I might as well repost this article about him from December 30, 2018. Tellingly enough, the post that inspired this rant is now gone. Oh well… I’m sure Roosh is just a big ol’ troll, and I don’t take him seriously at all. Nevertheless, I did mention him in the earlier repost, so here’s what I was referring to for history’s sake. Happy reading, anyway.

It’s a dark morning here in the central-western Germany, the last Sunday of 2018.  I woke up at about 6:00am, as usual, because my dog, Zane, was whining to go outside and have his breakfast.  Once I woke up, I couldn’t get back to sleep.  I started reading Facebook and noticed a link to a blog post that was shared in the Duggar Family News: Life is not pickles and hairspray group.

I don’t know how I missed this, but there’s an apparently popular blogger out there, name of Roosh V, who writes all kinds of inflammatory shit about how he thinks the world should operate.  I haven’t taken the time to read a lot of his posts.  I probably should read more of them before I comment too much, although the first post I read was a doozy.  Before I even started reading the post, which was published in September 2015, I was confronted by this…

Um…  “bad girls”?  Wow.  What kind of women is this man meeting?

I’m going to try to confine my comments about Roosh V’s blog strictly to what I’ve read so far.  For all I know, he’s not as sexist and backward as he seems.  I am myself the victim of people who make judgments of me based on just one or two controversial postings I’ve made.  I don’t like hypocrisy.  On the other hand, I’m not sure I want to read too much more of Roosh’s blog, mainly because what I have read is very offensive.

The post I read is entitled “Women Must Have Their Behavior And Decisions Controlled By Men”.  Roosh V observes that it’s only been within the last hundred years or so that women have been allowed to make decisions regarding their education, religion, life goals, and family plans.  He reminds his readers that until recently, women were expected to be under the care of a male guardian, or at least constrained by “tribe, family, church, law, or stiff cultural precepts.”  

Since women have been allowed more freedom, they have, in Roosh V’s opinion, made “poor choices” that have negatively affected society.  Roosh V writes that women are not as rational as men are, and they make decisions that are not in their best interests.  He admires German philosopher Arthur Shopenhauer, who wrote an essay called “On Women“.  According to Roosh V, Shopenhauer compares women to “overgrown children”, as evidenced by their consistently “impulsive” and “illogical” behavior.

As I was reading Roosh V’s post, I couldn’t help but notice how dispassionate his writing is.  The tone seems rather matter-of-fact, which sort of gives it a dangerous air of legitimacy.  Some of what he writes, on the surface, makes sense.  I even agree with a few of his more basic ideas, like encouraging people to travel more and interact with people who aren’t from the United States.  I think that’s actually a good idea.  But then I read more and see that he’s actually very xenophobic and sexist, although I haven’t yet seen too much evidence of racism.  I don’t really care to spend much time searching his writings to determine if he’s racist.

I think if Roosh V had written a more emotional screed, it would be easier to simply laugh at the nonsense conveyed in this post.  I don’t know what kind of women Roosh V has surrounded himself with, but clearly he hasn’t had much experience with diverse women.  Are there “impulsive”, “immature”, “unwise”, “overgrown children” women out there?  Yes, I think there definitely are.  But I have also seen many men who could be described in the same way.

Roosh V explains that left to their own devices, women make bad choices.  Have a look at his reasoning.

I could take the time to refute each of these claims.  Most of them don’t apply to me, personally.  I had a lot of freedom to choose when I was growing up.  I apparently made good choices, as evidenced by the privileged life I lead.  But even if I hadn’t made good choices, I might still be privileged.  Or, I could have made good choices and still been dealt “shitty cards”.  I think much of life is a crapshoot.

As I mentioned before, I didn’t read a lot of Roosh V’s blog, although he does apparently believe that heterosexual American men should seek foreign women (I had a link, but it’s dead now).  He thinks they’re “sweeter” and “more pleasing”, and likely to be thinner and more attractive.  I can tell Roosh V doesn’t get out much, nor does he really listen to women from other countries.  They may seem “sweeter” and more pleasing, but trust me, a lot of them have their ways of getting what they want.  They just go about it in a less straightforward and more manipulative manner.  I think Roosh V is foolish for apparently taking them at face value.  

I did read Roosh V’s “About Me” page, on which he writes that he shares Donald Trump’s birthday.  He also writes that his “important work” has been covered in many countries and he’s been targeted by “social justice” groups who want him silenced.  

For the record, I don’t agree with trying to silence people like Roosh V.  I clearly disagree with his opinions about women, but I support his right to have and express them without threats of violence.  While the content of his blog appears to be offensive to many people and counter to most modern thinking, they are basically his thoughts and opinions.  I think he has the right to communicate them, even if I think they’re mostly ludicrous.  On the other hand, it’s scary how many people secretly think the way Roosh V does.  Since Trump was elected, these people have become emboldened.  I can see why so many people are afraid to allow Roosh V’s more troubling ideas to go unchallenged.

But man… he does have some nerve, doesn’t he?  Look at this.

f you’re female, he expects you to send him a picture of yourself, so he can be sure you’re not a “troll”.  I wonder how he means that.  Is he referring to an Internet troublemaker or a very ugly person?  Before the Internet, trolls were defined as a derelict, homeless, or poor person, who would be considered dirty, unkempt, and probably unattractive.  The first time I heard of a “troll” was when I first heard the story “Three Billy Goats Gruff“.

I also notice that on his blog, Roosh V commented on the post I referenced in today’s post, assuring his readers that what he’s written is, in no way, satire.  He means every word.  And evidently, most of what matters to Roosh V is getting laid by a sexy woman who isn’t a “slut”.  How tragic.  What’s even sadder is that this guy is evidently making a living off of his ideas.  It could be that making money is all that’s behind his inflammatory postings.  The fact that it gets any positive regard is very troubling and sad.  I wonder if he’s like this simply because he’s a narcissist or because someone really hurt him.  I’m sure I’ll never know.  

Edited to add:  As of 2016, Roosh was still living in his mother’s basement.  That may be where some of his misogyny comes from.

Edited to add in 2023: He is half Iranian and half Armenian… so I don’t know. Maybe he’s just a troll. Maybe he really believes this shit he spews. Looks like he’s changed his contact form to one that is less contentious, and he claims he no longer gives pickup advice to men. Who knows? And really, who cares?

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complaints, Military, rants, stupid people

Repost: Slow down there, Dependa…

Hi folks. Happy President’s Day. I am still trying to come up with today’s fresh topic, so here’s a repost from December 31, 2018. It’s a little dated, as Trump was still president when I posted it… However, the basic idea is still valid, as a lot of insecure people still have derogatory opinions about people who aren’t like they are. I posted fresh content on the travel blog, and maybe later, I will do so here, too. I just need to come up with something.

Last night, I was reading the comments on an article posted by the Army Times (I had linked it, but the link doesn’t work now) about retired General Stanley McChrystal, who warns about Trump’s plans to cut troops in Afghanistan.  I honestly don’t know why I read the article, since this isn’t really a topic that interests me.  I think I read it because I recognized McChrystal’s name.  But anyway, as usual, I ignored the little voice in my head that always tells me to avoid reading the comments on news articles posted on Facebook, particularly by military types.

It’s no secret that a lot of military folks are die hard Republicans, even though the military lifestyle is a study in socialism.  The government provides servicemembers with all sorts of benefits, ranging from housing to medical to educational.  And yet, many military people are typically politically conservative.  While there are many military servicemembers who are intelligent and thoughtful, and they vote for people over political parties, there are a lot of others who are doggedly persistent in voting for parties over people.  Consequently, we end up with immoral and incompetent morons like Donald Trump as our president.

Adding insult to injury is the pervasive stupidity and sexism among some servicemembers.  I see comment after comment, typically by insecure men, demeaning people whose opinions don’t line up with their world views.  More than one male laments how the Army Times is becoming “liberal”, simply because like most other legitimate news sources, it doesn’t heap praise on Donald Trump or his cronies.  And if one points out some of Trump’s many shortcomings, the insults fly with wild abandon, particularly if the other commenter is female.

One comment that I frequently see on publications such as the Army Times is, “Have you served?”  It seems that according to some Facebook users, one must have signed up for the military to make a  comment about any topic regarding the military.  It doesn’t matter if one has been around military people from birth.  A person’s experiences working with the military, being married to the military, or having been raised by the military means nothing to these lunkheads.  Time after time, I see these uninformed folks bringing up the “oath” they recited to protect and defend the Constitution.

I bet a lot of servicemembers would be very surprised that I, as a returned Peace Corps Volunteer, took the very same oath on August 22, 1995 that they did when they joined the service.  Thirty of my American colleagues were with me that day, as I swore “to support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic.”  Servicemembers are not the only ones who take that oath, nor are they they only ones who serve their country.

So what’s bringing on today’s rant?  As I was reading people’s thoughts on General McChrystal’s comments regarding Trump’s leadership, I noticed an intelligent and coherent comment made by a brave woman, who wasn’t quick to dismiss McChrystal’s warnings.  The man she was engaging immediately responded with, “Slow down there, Dependa!”  I almost wish she’d responded with, “Speed up there, Numbnuts.”

For those who have not read my previous rants about the term “dependa”, and don’t know what it means, allow me to offer a quick explanation.  “Dependa” is short for “dependapotamus”.  It’s in reference to the term “dependent”, which is government-ese for the spouse and children of someone who is serving or has served in the military and receives benefits.  There is a pervasive and specific stereotype of woman this term refers to.  It’s generally a very uneducated woman who’s fat, ugly, and willing to put out for marriage to a military guy who will give her his benefits.  She typically spends all his money, pops out babies, doesn’t have a job or go to school, and thinks her “job” is being a “proud military wife”, to the point of wearing t-shirts and putting “proud Army wife” bumper stickers on her SUV.

I have been around military folks my entire life.  In truth, I haven’t run into too many people who fit the “dependa” stereotype, save for Bill’s ex wife.  Last night, I read this very disrespectful article about the so-called “dependa” phenomenon.  It kind of pissed me off, but at the same time, I have to admit Bill’s ex does fit the description quite well, at least when they first got married.  And Bill, bless his heart, did fall for her bullshit, in part, because he was lonely.  It’s true that I despise Bill’s ex wife, but if I’m honest and objective, she was a high school dropout; she has five kids by three men– all three of whom were once in the military; she did drain Bill’s bank account; and she was very interested in his benefits.  But never mind that…  I’m sure there must be others like Ex, since this is such a pervasive insult among military types. 

What makes me sad, though, are the people who automatically label any spouse or family member a “dependa”.  It doesn’t matter who she is (and it’s almost always a she).  She could have a full time job and make more money than her husband does.  She’s still a “dependa” in the eyes of some of these boneheads.  She could have never had children, wear a size four dress, and be working on her Ph.D.  She’s still a “dependa”, if she’s married to a guy in the military.  And as a dependa, her comments are irrelevant and easily dismissed.  Actually, a woman with education seems to be even more offensive to some of these folks.  They complain about uneducated, unemployed women who act like leeches, but God forbid you go beyond a simple bachelor’s degree.  Then, you don’t know your place and need to be knocked down a peg or two.

Anyway, I noticed that the guy who wrote “Slow down there, Dependa” must have been threatened by the intelligent remarks made by the woman he was addressing.  I think if you must immediately insult a stranger in a retort to them, you must not be very sure of your own standing.  To the woman’s credit, she defended her decidedly “not dependa” status, clarifying that she has a degree and earns as much money as her husband does.  And she called him an “ass” for insulting her with that degrading label.

I would have included their exchange in this post, but by the time I went back to find it, it had disappeared.  I wonder why.  I haven’t noticed the Army Times deleting offensive comments, so maybe the guy who wrote “Slow down there, Dependa” felt badly for writing it.  He should feel bad about that.  Are there any women in his life that he loves?  Would he want them to be called “dependa” or some other derogatory name, simply because of where her spouse works?

Some people probably think of me as a “dependa”, although I’m not uneducated and have never had children.  I suppose it’s less offensive to me to be called that by people who’ve met me or even know me online.  In fairness, I do sponge off of my husband, although I don’t spend his money on Coach bags or abuse the Tricare system. 

But this was an exchange between two strangers.  The guy who immediately tossed out the “dependa” insult didn’t even pretend to take the woman’s comments seriously.  He simply made those comments because she’s female and married to someone in the military.  And, it was very obvious to me that she way outpaced him in the intelligence department.  That’s probably why he felt he had to insult her.  He clearly couldn’t hold a candle to her mental acuity and couldn’t stand the idea that she’s obviously smarter than he is. 

This is certainly not the only time I’ve written about this subject.  Unfortunately, I’ve read a lot of sexist, demeaning, insulting, and downright nasty comments from men who lack the ability to be civilized on social media.  It won’t change.  I shouldn’t read comments on the Army Times… but on the positive side, at least this kept me from reading more blog posts by Roosh V.

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