Yesterday, I wrote a piece about a disturbing revelation in Kristi Noem’s upcoming memoir, No Going Back: The Truth on What’s Wrong with Politics and How We Move America Forward. By now, you’ve probably already heard about it. For those who haven’t, here’s a very quick synopsis.

Noem, who is the current 52 year old Governor of South Dakota, shared a story in her upcoming book about how she decided to use a gun to “put down” her fourteen month old German wirehair pointer puppy, Cricket, and a billy goat who was “disgusting, musky, rancid” and “loved to chase” Noem’s children, knock them down, and ruin their clothes. The story was apparently meant to demonstrate to everyone that Noem isn’t afraid to undertake difficult, unpleasant, messy jobs. She was raised on a ranch, and had parents who taught her to be “tough”. Apparently, she also learned to be cruel and never developed any common sense.

It’s hard to fathom that Noem is so out of touch with the American public that she thought her story about gunning down her pets would go over well. Where was she when the story about Mitt Romney’s dog, Seamus, was made public back in 2012? Kristi and I are about six months apart in age. I remember 2012 pretty well.

People were outraged that Romney reportedly made his dog, Seamus, ride in a carrier on top of his car back in 1983. That story, in 2012, was almost 30 years old. It still really pissed off people to hear about it. And here’s Noem in 2024, writing about how, sometime around 2004 or so, she couldn’t muster the good sense and compassion to deal with her “troublesome” animals better than to dispatch them with a gun. She really thought people would think her story was appropriate and a signal of strength in leadership?

Based on what I’ve seen online, Kristi Noem is getting dragged relentlessly by the public. People are pissed, and rightfully so. I think it’s especially bad for Kristi, because she’s a woman. But she’s not only a woman. She’s a mother and a grandmother. Many people think women are supposed to be more compassionate, nurturing, and kind, and they’re supposed to protect children at all costs.

Kristi Noem has tried to project that protective image of the unborn, sharing her negative opinions of abortion and championing strict bans on abortion access, as she insults women by assuming that those who request abortion care are simply lacking the “best information”. Noem has said that she views abortion as “tragic”… but she clearly doesn’t see already born, sentient, thinking, feeling animals as anything more than objects to be used and violently executed on a whim.

Yesterday, as I was writing my post and creating my parody song based on her story about killing her animals, I came across another disturbing tale from the recent past. I’m surprised it wasn’t more sensational when it happened in 2023. Although her comments reportedly did go viral last year, they didn’t reach the level of notoriety that her recent story about Cricket, the dog, has.

It turns out that Kristi Noem really loves her guns and wants to share them… even with her toddler aged granddaughter.

In April 2023, Kristi Noem told an audience at a National Rifle Association (NRA) lobbying leadership forum in Indiana that her then two-year-old granddaughter already owns two guns. At the time, Noem had two grandchildren, Addie and Branch. Addie was two years old, and Branch was still an infant. As she spoke to the gun enthusiast gathering, Noem said:

“Now Addie, who you know – soon will need them, I wanna reassure you, she already has a shotgun and she already has a rifle and she’s got a little pony named Sparkles too. So the girl is set up,”

Gov. Kristi Noem (R-SD), addressing the NRA-ILA Leadership Forum, says her nearly 2-year-old granddaughter “already has a shotgun, and she already has a rifle.” pic.twitter.com/d7V4Kslmo3

— The Recount (@therecount) April 14, 2023

What… the… actual… FUCK?!

Has Kristi Noem not heard about the many small children who have been shot and killed when they’ve gotten their hands on their parents’ weapons? Has she not read about the children who have accidentally wounded or killed their parents or siblings when they’ve played with guns?

What in the hell does a two-year-old child need with a shotgun or a rifle? Even if Addie “owns guns”, and they’re locked up somewhere safe, why in the hell would a politician brag about such a thing to a crowd? It’s just another example of Noem’s poor judgment and borderline psychopathy. Two-year-olds should be focused on learning the very basic things that very small children learn. Guns should not be a part of their world at that age. They have their whole lives to learn about guns. Sadly, a lot of them will learn about them in school.

That’s just my opinion, of course…

I grew up in a rural community. When I was a kid, Gloucester, Virginia was still very country. During my fifth grade year, in the early 80s, my entire class took a hunter safety course. That was because there were (and likely still are) so many guns in the community. A whole lot of kids hunted and fished. Our community determined that ten year olds should learn the basics about how to handle weapons safely. But I was ten at the time, and my family didn’t own weapons.

I know South Dakota is a very rural state with lots of rugged wilderness, farms, and ranches. But surely they have access to the Internet, right? Haven’t they heard about children dying when they’ve mishandled guns?

Didn’t they hear about the six year old child who brought a gun to school last year and shot a teacher? Do they know that the child’s mother has been sentenced to 21 months in prison for allowing her child to access the weapon that permanently changed his teacher, Abby Zwerner’s, life? Abby Zwerner, by the way, is the niece of an old friend of mine from high school. So, even though I’m long removed from school, and don’t have children of my own, in a way, I’ve been personally touched by what happened to her in Newport News, Virginia last year, as she was simply trying to earn a living and teach small children how to function in today’s world.

Kristi Noem’s granddaughter, Addie, is now presumably three years old. I’m sure she’s had a chance to see and touch her guns. I hope she’s still enjoying Sparkles, the pony. But I especially hope Sparkles never does anything to piss off Kristi Noem. Otherwise, the cute little pony could be meeting the same fate as Cricket, the puppy, and the unnamed billy goat who served as Noem’s target practice on that fateful day twenty years ago.

Here’s a Facebook post about Addie and Sparkles, who was a birthday gift for the one year old child…

I think Kristi Noem’s comments about protecting life are quite disingenuous. I’m disgusted by her love affair with weapons, which only reveals that she really doesn’t respect life much at all. But I’m horrified that she thinks it’s a good thing that her toddler aged granddaughter is being indoctrinated to be as gun crazy as she is. I don’t know about other Americans, but I am so tired of hearing and reading about children being killed by guns… especially when they’re in a place that should be a safe place of learning for them.

I hope she continues to be dragged for what she did to those animals… and I hope people also realize that for all her talk about the “sanctity of life” and the protection of the unborn starting at fertilization, she really doesn’t give a damn about anything but money, power, and prestige. I don’t cheer for abortions myself, but I am much less horrified about them than I am about children being seriously injured or dying because they’ve encountered guns– whether due to a school shooting, or because they have a parent or grandparent with an “ammosexual” attitude akin to Kristi Noem’s.

And… based on what we’ve seen of Trump lately, nodding off during his criminal trial in New York, I would definitely not want Noem as VP. I don’t want that crazed gun nut running the country if Trump keels over, as he certainly will one day.